Infidelity internationally

In Japan it’s called “going off the path” and in Israel it’s “eating to the side” (Druckerman, 2007). But regardless of differences in lingo, the suffering that ensues from sexual betrayal is similar around the globe.

Wall Street Journal reporter Pamela Druckerman interviewed people in 10 different countries, gauging their infidelity attitudes and behaviors. She discovered vast cultural differences, and some similarities. For example, in Japan, intricate rules of discretion guide how one cheats; whereas in Finland, people are more open in discussing and engaging in adultery. In Russia, Druckerman was struck by its sheer prevalence.

One marital therapist told her, “Affairs should be obligatory, because they make for stronger marriages,” and an issue of Russian Cosmopolitan provided instructional tips to women for how to hide their betrayals from their partners.

Druckerman’s observations mirror scientific research. A study of nonmarital sex involving 24 nations and 33,000 respondents found that the top three countries in infidelity acceptance were Russia, Bulgaria, and the Czech Republic

(Widmer, Treas, & Newcomb, 1998). The most infidelity intolerant? The Philippines, Ireland, and the United States.

Despite cultural differences, however, Druckerman notes at least three betrayal universals (Corner, 2007). First, across cultures, people who cheat prefer partners who also are seriously involved, making the risks “evenly shared.”

Second, cheaters typically describe themselves as “not the cheating type.” And finally, regardless of cultural attitudes or prevalence, sexual betrayal almost always causes intense emotional pain and relationship distress. When asked the lessons learned from her study, Druckerman described, “I still very much believe in monogamy as the ideal, but I have become more realistic— or fatalistic—about it. I now think it could easily happen to me. And, if it does, I won’t automatically assume my relationship is over.”

• What lessons have you learned from your culture regarding the ethics of infidelity? How have these lessons shaped your beliefs? Your relationship behaviors?

• If a partner cheated on you, would you assume that your involvement was over, or would you try to repair and rebuild your relationship? What impact would your cultural values have upon your decision?

Film: On Golden Pond

The loons are back again on Golden Pond and so are Norman Thayer, a retired professor, and Ethel who have had a summer cottage there since early in their marriage. This summer their daughter Chelsea -- whom they haven't seen for years -- feels she must be there for Norman's birthday. She and her fiance are on their way to Europe the next day but will be back in a couple of weeks to pick up the fiance's son. When she returns Chelsea is married and her stepson has the relationship with her father that she always wanted. Will father and daughter be able to communicate at last?

Please read the assignment carefully and write a good paragraph in response to each of the questions, referring to at least ONE concept in each of the paragraphs.

1. How do different kinds of Aristotelian love manifest themselves in relationships shown in the film?

2. How do the characters define “love” and “romance”? What barriers exist between them because of these definitions?

3. What influences on romantic attraction exist in the film?

4. How do the characters work to maintain their relationships?

5. What lessons can the younger generation and the older generation teach each other as shown in the film?

Дата добавления: 2015-10-30