Collaborating in conflict

This exercise helps you use collaboration to manage a conflict.

➊ The next time you are in a conflict, openly discuss the situation, emphasizing that it’s an understandable clash between goals rather than people.

➋ Highlight common interests and long-term goals.

➌ Create several solutions for resolving the conflict that are satisfactory to both of you.

➍ Combine the best elements of these ideas into a single, workable solution.

➎ Evaluate the solution you’ve collaboratively created, ensuring that it’s fair and ethical.

CREATING BETTER CONFLICT RESOLUTION

This exercise helps you to create better conflict resolutions.

➊ When a conflict arises in a close relationship, manage your negative emotions.

➋ Before communicating with your partner, call to mind the long-term relational consequences of your various communication choices.

➌ Employ a collaborative approach, and avoid kitchen-sinking.

➍ As you negotiate solutions, keep your original goals in mind but remain flexible about how they can be attained.

➎ Revisit relationship rules or agreements that might have triggered the conflict, and consider redefining them in ways that prevent future disputes.

WORKING EFFECTIVELY THROUGH CONFLICT ONLINE

This exercise helps you effectively work through conflict online.

➊ Wait before responding to a message or post that provokes you.

➋ Reread and reassess the message.

➌ Consider all of the factors that may have caused the other person to communicate this way.

➍ Discuss the situation offline with someone you trust.

➎ Craft a competent response that begins and ends with supportive statements, uses “I” language, expresses empathy, and emphasizes mutuality rather than just your own perspective and goals.

VII. Extra Credit: Quiz

Take one of these quizzes and write a one-page reflection on your results referring to at least THREE concepts in the chapter (10 points).

Quiz 1: High or Low Power Distance

Read each statement. Place a check mark next to the statements with which you agree. Then follow the instructions for interpreting your score.

——— There are few things worse than a person who doesn’t feel gratitude and respect for his or her parents.

——— What this country needs most is a few courageous, tireless, and devoted leaders in whom the people can put their faith.

——— In times of doubt, people should trust our country’s leaders to do what’s right.

——— Obedience and respect for authority are the most important values children should learn.

——— What young people need most is strict discipline, rugged determination, and the willingness to sacrifice for family and country.

——— Every person should have complete faith in some supernatural power whose decisions he or she obeys without question.

——— Young people sometimes get rebellious ideas, but as they grow up they ought to get over these ideas and settle down.

Scoring: If your total score is 5–7, you’re likely a high authoritarian; a score of 3–4 suggests you’re a moderate authoritarian; 0–2 indicates you’re a low authoritarian.

Quiz 2: Conflict Approach

Read through the statements, placing a check mark next to each statement with which you agree.

Дата добавления: 2015-10-30