Science Friction. 1. A student in science class wrote, The universe is a giant orgasm. At the end of the student's essay

1. A student in science class wrote, "The universe is a giant orgasm. " At the end of the student's essay, the teacher riposted, "Your answer gives new meaning to the Big Bang Theory. "

2. All animals were here before mankind. The animals lived peacefully until mankind came along and made roads, houses, hotels, and condoms.

3. Sir Isaac Newton invented gravity.

4. Galileo showed that the earth was round and not vice versa. He dropped his balls to prove gravity.

5. Marie and Perrier Curie shared the Noble Prize.

6. Marie Curie did her research at the Sore Buns Insti­tute in France.

7. Mushrooms always grow in damp places and so they look like umbrellas.

8. Dinosaurs became extinct after the flood because they were too big to get into the ark.

9. Parallel lines never meet unless you bend one or both of them.

10. Algebra was the wife of Euclid.

11. A circle is a figure with no corners and only one side.

12. A right angle is 90 degrees Farenhight.

13. Water is composed of two gins, Oxygin and Hydrogin. Oxygin is pure gin. Hydrogin is gin and water.

14. As the rain forests in the Amazon are shrinking, so are the Indians.

15. The union of the egg and sperm is called deception.

16. Human beings share a need for food, shelter, and sex with lower animals.

17. The safest sex is absence.

18. On a date, a boy tries to show how masculine he is. On this point, a girl can help greatly.

19. Teenage suicide is a problem because approximately 400,000 teenagers attempt to commit suicide and only 7,000 succeed.

Finally, here are some science daffynitions concocted by our students, who are well on their way to becoming the scientists of tomorrow:

- Aorta: a man who makes long speeches.

- Equator: a managerie lion running around the Earth through Africa.

Дата добавления: 2015-07-19