In-flight service

Dialogue

Soft music fills the cabin of the four-engined jetliner. The public address system suddenly crackles into life. An air hostess begins the passenger departure briefing, followed by demonstrations to show passengers how to use the emergency oxygen equipment and the lifejackets that are under every seat. After take-off, the “No Smoking” and “Fasten Seatbelt” signs go off. Two air hostesses begin to take orders for drinks.

Passenger: All that business about emergency oxygen masks and lifejackets makes me feel a little nervous.

Mr. Marshall: It’s your first flight, then?

Passenger: Yes – is it that obvious?

Mr. Marshall: Not really, but all airlines have to go through the routine of explaining how to put on a lifejacket and what to do if the emergency oxygen masks drop down from those units above our heads.

Passenger: Is there a mask for everyone?

Mr. Marshall: Oh, yes, of course. I’ve never ever heard of them being used, though.

Passenger: Why would we ever need to use them?

Mr. Marshall: The atmosphere inside the aircraft is pressurized at a level between five and seven thousand feet. Yet we are flying at 35,000 feet. If for any reason the pressurization failed, we should need oxygen masks.

Passenger: That’s interesting. I didn’t know that. How long would you have to keep the masks on?

Mr. Marshall: Not for long. The captain would take the aircraft down to an altitude where the need for pressurization doesn’t exist.

Air hostess: We are serving drinks now, sir. Would you like to order something?

Mr. Marshall: A gin and tonic with some ice, please.

Passenger: Same for me, please.

Air hostess: Certainly, sir. In a little while we’ll be selling cigarettes and spirits.

Passenger: I haven’t flown before. Are the drinks free?

Air hostess: No, I’m sorry to say. Only first-class passengers get everything free, but then they do pay almost twice as much for their air tickets.

Passenger: What about the cigarettes and spirits you said you’d be selling later?

Air hostess: They cost about the same as in the airport duty-free shop.

Passenger: Why do you sell them in the aircraft if we can buy them at the airport?

Air hostess: It is just a little extra service on the part of the airline, really. Sometimes passengers don’t get the chance to buy things in the duty-free shop because they’re late checking in. Excuse me, I’ll get your drinks.

Mr. Marshall: Did you get your duty-free liquor allowance before you boarded?

Passenger: No, I didn’t think…

Air hostess: Excuse me, gentlemen, your drinks. I’ve opened the cans of tonic water for you. Would you like me to pour?

Mr. Marshall: Don’t bother, we’ll do it, thank you.

Passenger: Mmm. This is just what I needed. Cheers.

Mr. Marshall: Cheers. Feeling a little happier now, are you?

Passenger: Oh, yes. In fact, if I couldn’t see that we’re flying above the clouds, I’d believe we were still on the ground.

Mr. Marshall: It’s usually like this, although once or twice I’ve had a bumpy flight. They switch on the “Seatbelt” signs and ask you to strap yourself in. It’s just a precaution.

Passenger: What makes a flight bumpy?

Mr. Marshall: Sometimes it’s just stormy weather. Then occasionally it’s what they call CAT – clear air turbulence.

Passenger: Ah, here comes the hostess with the trolley.

Air hostess: Would you like to purchase something, sir?

Passenger: Two hundred cigarettes and a bottle of Scotch, please.

Air hostess: Yes, sir. Any particular brand of cigarettes?

Passenger: No, so long as they’re king-size tipped.

Air hostess: I am sorry, sir, but we haven’t any full-size bottles of Scotch. Would two half-bottles do?

Passenger: Yes, that’s fine.

Mr. Marshall: Nothing for me, thank you. When is lunch being served?

Air hostess: In about half an hour, sir.

Passenger: That’s good. I’m feeling hungry already.

Mr. Marshall: Lost that nervousness, then?

Passenger: Yes, I feel quite at home now. They do look after you well.

Дата добавления: 2015-11-16