Сurious and funny stories about the Beatles

- What's the title of the record and who's it by? - It's called "My Bonny" and it's by the Beatles. - Let's see. B, double E... - No. Beatles, spelt B - E - A - T - L - E - S. - That's an odd way to spell it. Oh, I see. BEAT-les.

NARRATORS:

John Lennon Paul McCartney The Beatles George Harrison Ringo Starr Astrid Kirchherr – Beatles' friend George Martin – Beatles' producer Michael McCartney – Paul's younger brother Alistair Taylor – managers of Peter Brown – the Beatles

I

For the first official meeting with their manager Brian Epstein John, George and Pete Best arrived at the appointed time*. But there was no sign of Paul. After half an hour, during which Brian was trying to contain his temper**, he asked George to phone Paul's home and find out what was wrong. It turned out that Paul was in the bath. "This is disgraceful***," said Brian angrily. "He's going to be very late." "But very clean," George added.

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*назначенное время

**сдержался

***зд. возмутительно

II

JOHN: In the beginning it was a constant fight between Brian [Epstein] and Paul on the one side and me and George on the other.

Brian put us in neat* suits and shirts, and Paul liked that. I didn't. I tried to get George to rebel** with me: "Look, we don't need these suits. Let's chuck*** them out of the window." I used to have my tie loose, with the top button of my shirt undone****, but Paul always came up to me and put it straight.

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*аккуратные

**бунтовать

*** швырять

****зд. расстёгнутая (пуговица)

III

Before they started their first recording session with George Martin, he explained to them what he was trying to do. "Let me know if there's anything you don't like," he said.

"Well, for a start", said George Harrison, "I don't like your tie." This was a half-serious joke and George Martin didn't like it. He had on, in fact, a brand* new tie, which he was proud of. It was black with red horses on and came from Liberty's. But everyone laughed and the session proceeded**.

___________

*фирменный

**продолжилась

IV

George Martin found a song he was sure was going to be a hit. It was called "How Do You Do It". He sent it to the Beatles who didn't like it. George Martin said he did. He was the boss. He wanted them to record it. So they had to. They still said they didn't like it and didn't want to record it.

GEORGE MARTIN: "I told them they were turning down a hit*. But they produced the better song, 'Please Please Me', which knocked me out**. "

George Martin was so delighted*** with the recording session that when it was done he announced over the intercom**** from the control booth*****, "Gentlemen, you've just recorded your first Number One". But he was right about "How Do You Do It". He gave the song to another Liverpool group, who made it Number One.

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*отказываются от хита

**нокаутировала меня

***восхищен

****селекторная связь

*****операторская

V

PAUL: One of my sixties memories is about a fan in the street. I jumped out of the taxi, ran up to her and pulled her jacket off. I said, "That's my jacket!" because we'd had a burglary* and it was like one of mine. But it actually wasn't mine, there were a lot of them in the shop and she'd bought one. She said, "It's the wrong size, it's mine." So "Oh, God, I'm sorry, I'm sorry!" Put her down.

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*кража со взломом

VI

There was a legend that jelly-babies* were the Beatles' fa­vourite sweets. And people all over the world threw millions of them on stage. Twice during their show in Sydney Paul McCartney stopped singing and asked the audience:"Please, don't throw those sweets at us. They get in our eyes." Each time his request was greeted by screams and another shower of sweets.

JOHN: " It's ridiculous**. They even throw miniature koala bears and gift wrapped packages while we are going round on the revolving stage. We haven't a chance to get out of the way."

In Chicago a purple and yellow stuffed animal, a red rubber ball and a skipping rope*** were thrown on the stage. But jelly-babies were the worst.

GEORGE HARRISON: "It was terrible, they hurt. They don't have soft jelly-babies in America but hard jelly-beans like bullets. Some newspapers had dug out**** the old joke which we'd forgotten about, when John once said I'd eaten all his jelly-babies. Every­where we went I got them thrown at me."

RINGO: "It's all right for you lot. You can jump aside, but I'm stuck at the drums and can't move, so they all seem to hit me."

To make matters worse during the concert at Washington Colise­um Ringo was on a revolving platform, so the whole audience could see him. It took half an hour for him to recover from his dizziness*****.

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*леденцы

**Это нелепо.

***скакалка

****выкопали

*****головокружение

VII

Touring was dangerous sometimes, but they never thought about it. One bitterly cold January night they had to drive from London to Liverpool without a windscreen, which had shattered*, they tried to keep the warmth by laying on top of one another in the back seat of their van. During their show in Stockholm, Sweden, Paul received a mild electric shock from an unearthed micro - phone**. Once they flew from Liverpool to London with a window open. In Texas their plane caught fire and scared everyone. There was a woman in the United States who had predicted*** President Kennedy's death. She said the plane the Beatles were travelling on would crash. Some of other passengers refused to go on that plane.

RINGO: "We were a bit worried when our death was predicted on a plane in the States. That wasn't nice. Now a lot of people think we were saying a prayer. What we did actually – we drank."

Unfortunately that American astrologer was nearly right: the airplane crashed in April 1966, but without the Beatles on its board.

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* разбилось вдребезги

** незаземленный микрофон

***предсказала

VIII

ALISTAIR TAYLOR: I was in the office that morning when the telephone rang. It was Brian. He was in a total panic. Did I know that John and Paul were due to collect* an Ivor Novello award at the Savoy Hotel at lunchtime? Yes, of course, I did. So what? The problem was that Brian had forgotten to tell them the date, time or place! They were due to be at the Savoy at twelve-thirty for the formal presentation.I glanced at my watch.Eleven o'clock. "They'll never make it, Brian". I knew that John was at Weybridge so I ought to contact him first, as he would have further to travel. I took a deep breath and dialled his number.I don't think I can put into writing what John said when he realized that I was seriously expecting him to drop everything and come up to London within two hours.I didn't blame him. To be dragged out of bed and told you're expected in front of the cameras at lunchtime must be fairly traumatic.

That left only Paul. I knew he had been out late last night. Would he be awake? Oh, please, let him be in, and awake and in a reasonable frame of mind**. At last the receiver was lifted, a very sleepy and none-too-pleased Paul came on the line. In my best diplomatic style I told him the story. There was a very long silence at the other end, until I thought he must have put the phone down. Then came the answer: "OK, be round in a cab to pick me up in ten minutes' time." Good old Paul! I raced off to the taxi-rank*** and arrived at Wimpole Street in about a quarter of an hour. As I dashed up to the top step,the door opened and there was Paul, washed, shaved, and groomed****, in a freshly pressed suit and clutching in his hand a piece of toast! His expression seemed to say, "What's the panic? Have I ever let you down?" And I knew that he'd been asleep not twenty minutes before!

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*должны были получить

** был в состоянии соображать

*** стоянка такси

****тщательно одетый

IX

ALISTAIR TAYLOR: We were all at Abbey Road and the boys were recording, as usual. It was ten o'clock and they were really fed up* because it wasn't going right. There was something missing**, but no one knew what they needed. Suddenly Paul came up with a good idea. "Do you know what we need? We need a bank*** of saxes just there and again there." He hummed the tune, showing where the saxes were to go. "Yes, you could be right**** ", said George Martin.

The next step was to find musicians who would agree to work so late at night. While Mal was ringing round to agents who knew all the session men in the music business,we went to a little canteen with a coffee vending machine in the corner. Some time later the musicians started to arrive. And as Paul and I walked out of the canteen,the door opened and in walked the man whose face any jazz fan like me could recognize blindfold in a coal cellar, one of the most famous saxophonists in the world - Ronnie Scott, saxophone case in hand! In all my fantasies I never imagined that he would play as a session man for the Beatles!

His face meant nothing to Paul, who just stared at him without much interest. Before I could say anything, Paul asked, "Are you a sax player?" Ronnie Scott just grinned and replied, "Well, some people say I am," and walked on down the corridor! In horror I turned to Paul and whispered, "Paul, do you know who you've just been talking to?" "Yeah, he's a sax player." "It's Ronnie Scott!" Paul's face was a study in surprise*****. "You're joking! Oh no!" At once Paul went racing off to catch Ronnie Scott and offer his apologies for not recognizing him. They were soon talking like old friends, so I left them to it and went back to the door to greet any other saxophonists who was still arriving.

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*им это надоело

**чего-то не хватало

***зд. группа

****Возможно, ты прав.

*****Лицо Пола выражало крайнее изумление.

X

ALISTAIR TAYLOR: The stars were shining down from a frosty clear sky as Paul and I walked out of Abbey Road studios at 3 a.m.

We were tired and looking forward to a Scotch and Coke at Paul's house in Cavendish Avenue. Following us at a respectful distance* were two fans; they didn't approach us, being happy just to follow Paul.

High up on a wall at the corner of Cavendish Avenue is an ancient lamp like an old gaslight. Paul stopped here, the dim rays** of the lamp showing his ankle-length brown tweed coat and his acoustic guitar. "I've just written a new song. Would you like to hear it?"

And he gently took his guitar and, standing in the pale cone of light, sang very quietly, a song about blackbird with a broken wing. It seemed, Paul's plaintive*** boyish voice was the only sound in London. Several yards away the two fans stood, still silent, quite happy. Paul sang the song once, beautifully, in that chilly street and then he slung the guitar across the shoulder and casually broke the spell****.

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*на почтительном расстоянии

** тусклый свет

*** жалобный

****небрежно разрушил чары

XI

Paul, Mal Evans and the cameraman Aubrey Dewar left for Nice * to film "Fool On The Hill" on 30 October, 1967. Paul forgot to take a passport or any money but still managed to get through customs **.

PETER BROWN: "One day I received a phone call on the Beatles' private line.It was Paul and it sounded like long distance.'Where are you?'I asked him. 'I'm in Nice, France,' Paul told me, 'with a camera crew. We found the perfect hill, but we haven't brought the right lenses ***. Could you send them to us, along with some money?' 'Nice? Perfect hill? What are you talking about? How can you be in France? I have your passport.' Paul explained that he wanted to include a scene of him sitting on a picturesque ****hill and singing a song he had written in Magical Mystery Tour. The song was called ' The Fool On The Hill '. He took off for France without telling anybody and bluffed *****his way past the English authorities ******* at Heathrow, saying his passport was waiting for him in France.

PAUL: "I told them, 'You know who I am so why do you need to see a photograph of me in a passport?'"

In Nice he told the French officials the passport was arriving later by messenger, and they agreed to allow the celebrated visi­tor into the country.

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*Ницца

**таможенный досмотр

***линзы

****живописный

*****обманул

******authorities = officials – власти

XII

John Lennon's ' Strawberry Fields ' was one of the more complicated songs, in a technical sense. They did the usual basic tracks, then John played it at home and decided it wasn't what he wanted.

GEORGE MARTIN: "He wanted it as a gentle dreaming song. He asked if I could do for him a new line-up with the strings *. So I wrote a new score and we recorded that. But he didn't like it. It still wasn't right. What he wanted was the first half from the early recording, plus the second half of the new recording. Would I put them together for him? I said it was impossible. They were in different keys and different tempos."

Later George Martin noticed that if he sped up ** the slower tempo recording by five per cent *** it would bring it to the same

tempo and in the same key as the other one. So he was able to join both together, without too much trouble.

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*по новому выстроить струнные

**ускорит

***на пять процентов

XIII

Paul wanted George Martin to find the best musician to play the French horn solo in his song 'For No One'. George Martin booked Alan Civil, one of the Britain's top player to take part in the recording session. Paul hummed the melody that he wanted the French horn to play and George Martin wrote out the score. When it was finished, George pointed out to Paul * that the high note went just beyoned the top of the horn's range and showed him the reference book ** used for orchestral writing which showed the top notes of orchestral instruments. George Martin said, "But you know, these good players, they can play above the range."

PAUL: "Alan Civil said,'George?' and looked at us both.'George, you've writtena D.' George and I just looked at him, held our nerve *** and said 'Yes?' He gave us a crafty **** look and said, 'Okay'. So it worked. We did the same trick on ' Penny Lane ' with David Mason on the piccolo trumpet, and he almost never for­gave ***** me for it because the only thing people ever asked him to do after that was high trumpet stuff."

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*обратил внимание Пола

**справочник

***сдержали волнение

****хитрый

*****так и не простил

XIV

Once the Beatles were in the studio and there was Mary Hopkins, a young folk singer from Wales. She had a beautiful voice and she was a very graceful and modest person. She was playing the ordinary acoustic guitar which she always used and everybody was listening to her with pleasure.

While George thought that no one else was looking at him, he called Mal Evans over and whispered something in his ear. Mal grinned and slipped out of the door. When he came back, a couple of hours later, they were all taking a break and chatting. Mal was carrying a gleaming guitar case. He went up to George who blushed and looked embarrassed. He said, "No, you do it." Then Mal pre­sented the case to Mary, "George would like you to have this." When Mary opened the case, she found inside a beautiful Martinez­the best guitar money can buy. Mary was taking completely by surprise. * But it was typical of George. He liked the music she was playing and thought that she deserved something better to play it on.

George is a lovely man, indeed.

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*Для Мэри это была полная неожиданность.

XV

ALISTAIR TAYLOR: One evening I found myself * in Studio Two at Abbey Road with Mary Hopkins and Anne Nightingale, a journalist. The boys were recording, then they stopped for a break and Paul came up to us. He sat down on the piano stool and we all chatted for a few minutes. The conversation was about the art of song­writing and Paul asked Mary, "Do you write songs?" "Well", replied Mary, "the music is all right, but I have trouble with lyrics."

Paul turned round to the piano and lifted the lid, inviting Mary to sit beside him. He played us a simple three-chord number, which he progressed to five chords and beyond that. "Right", he said. "Let's think of a story - anything at all. Now suppose ** there's a guy who waits every morning at the bus-stop and there's a girl who always stands next to him in the queue ***. But he's very shy, he can't make himself talk to her." Paul picked out a tune and started to set the lyrics for this situation to it.

We sat in silence, listening to him. "Now one dark night he goes out to post a letter at the letter box on the corner. Just as he is putting his hand up to the opening ****, the girl appears from the other side and does the same thing." More lyrics and a stronger tune. "They both jump back in surprise, it turns out she's as shy as he is. They fall in love and live happily ever after. You see, that's how to write a song", concluded ***** Paul and swung round on the piano stool. He didn't understand how much he had impressed us. It was like one of us saying, "You see, that's how to boil an egg."

Later I asked Anne, "Are you going to write about that in your column?" With a sad smile she answered, "How could anyone write about what we've just seen?"

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*оказался

**предположим

***в очереди

****щель

*****заключил

XVI

ALISTAIR TAYLOR: Last night the boys had been recording until about three o'clock in the morning. Then they just called a few minutes' break* and went out of the room. But I felt that I'd had enough. All I wanted to do was get my head down** for three or four hours. But I was a kind of personal assistant to Paul at the moment and I couldn't leave the studios without seeing him. Where was Paul? I didn't know. He wasn't in any of his usual places. I I searched them all.At last I found him in the huge*** Number One studio, where full symphonies are recorded. Paul was sitting at the grand piano, with one hand he was picking out a beautiful me­lody on the keys. I came up to him. "It's wonderful", I said, "What are you doing?" "This is just an idea I've got for a song", Paul replied. "But it's lovely. The melody line is beautiful". " Hang on a minute****, said Paul. "Have you got any tape left?" he asked the technician in the control room. "Yeah", the guy shouted. "Right", said Paul and turned again to the keyboard. "You stand over there and shut up for a minute or two, Alistair".

I stood there just a few feet away while Paul composed a song out of this lovely melody, full of la-las and hums, but a song with shape and words and all in a few minutes of spare time. In three minutes it had grown from a casual****** idea into another Beatles song. God, where do they all come from? "Right, there you are", Paul yawned and stretched*******, I don't need you any more tonight. You can go home, and thanks for being here". "What do you call it, Paul?" I asked. "The Long And Winding Road'", he replied.

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*объявили перерыв на несколько минут

**преклонить голову

***огромная

****Подожди минуту.

*****случайная

******зевнул и потянулся

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