Read them through and say what problems they are faced with at home.

Note: Doctor Brothers and Marian are agony aunts with English newspapers.

Dear Doctor Brothers:   I’m a high school senior, and I took a part-time job against my parents’ wishes. They eventually relented, saying I could try, as long as I kept with my homework and my grades didn’t suffer. They didn’t at first, but now I have a new girlfriend. I’m trying to keep her happy, keep my folks happy, keep my grades up and keep my job. I love my parents, but lately I’m feeling really pressured. They say that I’m rude and short-tempered with them. Sometimes, I guess I am, but I don’t know what to do. That’s how I feel. – V.E.

Dear V.E.: One of the first symptoms of sleep deprivation is irritability, and it sounds to me that this may be your biggest problem. You’re spreading yourself too thin. You are going to have to start budgeting your time, according to your priorities. Even though your girlfriend is important to you, at this point in your life, your education is vital. Your parents know that much of your future depends upon your decisions and your actions over the next few years. If you make the wrong choices now, you’ll regret it later. If your girlfriend cares for you, and for herself, she must know that education is important for her and for you. Part of growing up is learning to compromise, negotiate and make wise choices. First, acknowledge that teenagers need eight hours of sleep. When you divide up your time, keep this in mind. If you are getting less, you’re short-changing yourself.

Dear Dr. Brothers: I’m 16 years old, and my mother still insists on going shopping with me, like I was an 8-year-old. I wouldn’t mind so much except her taste is definitely not mine. She wants me to wear stuff I’d never want to be seen dead in. It’s like she’s been living in another century. She always complains that what I want is too old and sexy for me. When I complain, she says, “Who’s paying for these clothes?” Of course, she is, but that doesn’t give her the right to make me look like a nun, does it? I have a good figure. What’s wrong with showing it off? – D.I.

Dear D. I.: Unless you wear huge, oversize clothing, your good figure will probably be obvious. A beautiful figure is often more attractive if the clothes are understated, rather than the kind of extreme cuts and colors that seem designed to stop traffic. Sometimes, what young girls think is sexy actually turns men off, so perhaps you might try to be open to clothing that is somewhere between what your mother wants you to wear and what you want to wear. Many parents today fear that youngsters your age are trying to grow up too fast and that they’ll be thrust into situations they can’t handle. Even though teenagers can be intelligent and trustworthy, they haven’t had the experience to cope with complex emotional and sexual problems. Try to remember that your mother isn’t trying to punish you, but protect you.

Dear Mariam,   I’m 17 and I really like this girl. The problem is she is my best friend’s younger sister. She’s a year younger than me but I really care about her and I think she feels the same way about me. I’ve been best mates with my friend since junior school and we get on really well. I don’t have loads of friends and I don’t want to ruin my friendship with her brother, as we do so much together. Should I ask her out and hope he understands or just keep this to myself?

If your intentions towards your best friend’s younger sister are entirely honourable, why should he object to your taking her out? After all, he’s chosen you as his best friend, so he must like you. Who better for his sister to have as a beau? I’d talk it over with him before asking her out. Not to ask his permission, you understanmd, but to let him know what you intend to do. Not mentioing it would look furtive and as if you had something to hide. I hope, after all this, the young girl in question likes you as much as you like her. It would probably be best if you asked her out in a group rather than one-to-one – at least at first. She’ll feel more secure that way and not under a lot of pressure.

4. Look at the letters again and analyze the agony aunts’ answers.

1. Do you find them …?

• elusive
• straightforward
• practical
• helpful
• encouraging
• moralizing
• instructive
• informative
• other

2. How would you formulate the main reason why they should seek a stranger’s advice?

3. Have you ever written to a newspaper asking for help? Or would you ever do it? Under what circumstances?

² Listening comprehension

1. Family upbringing starts at an early age and parents do their best to raise a well-behaved child. How come that their dearest and nearest become problem children? Discuss it with your partner and then with the group.

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