Kaidan or the world

W hat now?

Still hadn’t heard from Dad. Desperately wanted to talk to Kaidan. Was worried about Jay, Marna, Ginger, Blake, and Patti. And here I was driving aimlessly around Virginia.

A foolish part of me wanted to be near Patti and Jay, even if we couldn’t actually be together.

I stopped for gas in a tiny town, admiring the view of the Blue Ridge Mountains against the deep blue night sky. The scenery was abruptly ruined as two vile winged beings flew down and circled the car, watching me. Crap. Ignoring them, I started the car and got back on I-81.

They would never leave me alone.

There would be no hiding or escaping from the whisperers. I was being watched and followed. I could try to find a church like Jay, considering the spirits and Dukes wouldn’t go in. But they’d still know where I was, and they’d send their human lackeys in after me. All I could do was try to stay one step ahead.

Even on the open roads, surrounded by immense earthly beauty, I felt trapped.

Where are you, Dad? What am I supposed to do now? My brilliant plan to speak with Marek had been a whopping fail.

I wouldn’t cry, but my eyes burned and my breathing felt ragged.

The last thing Dad had advised, and all we Neph agreed to, was to pretend to work. Maybe that was what I should do. Instead of running and hiding, I could head to college. It was Dad’s plan for my life. My next “duty station,” where I’d put on a show of being a student while partying it up. Would it throw the Dukes off if I kept with the working charade instead of running and looking guilty? Anything was worth a try at this point.

I headed to Blacksburg, checking into a hotel since the dorms weren’t open.

Dorms. College. Ha. It was all in my grasp, and yet it wasn’t. I couldn’t even be excited by the cute town or fun atmosphere.

I tossed and turned all night, sweating despite the blasting air conditioner. My whole body hurt, and I fought the urge to go out and buy more painkillers, worried I’d take more than I should. I woke at six a.m. from a dream that was blurred and faint.

The sheets were still tangled around my hips when the knock at the door came, and my heart rate rocketed. I disengaged myself from the blankets, and grabbed the stun gun and knife from the nightstand. This hotel had no window or door through which to escape. My brain whirled.

Was it the sons of Thamuz? Kope had hurt one of them pretty badly—I couldn’t imagine they’d be on the go already. Hotel staff wouldn’t knock at the door this early. It had to be a Neph or Duke. Whisperers must have found me while I slept. Was it Marek and Caterina again? With great effort I forced my extended hearing outside the door and whispered, “Who is it?”

“Kaidan Rowe. Son of Pharzuph.”

My breath stuck and my internal organs somersaulted. It was his voice. But why did he sound so formal? And what the heck was he doing here? I sprinted to the entrance—no peephole!

I stood in front of the door, shaking. “What do you want?”

“I need to speak with you. Open up.”

Either it was really him, and something horrible was happening, or someone was doing a dang good impersonation.

“I’m not here to hurt you.” He spoke softly, but his tone sounded dangerous.

I didn’t want to be scared of Kaidan. My Kai. But instincts made me clutch the knife harder.

Swallowing down the moisture of emotion, I turned the doorknob. When I pulled the door open, my heart soared. It was definitely Kaidan, looking like he’d been up all night. His chin-length brown hair hung disheveled around a blast of bright blue eyes and a hardened face. Next to him, hovering with a malicious grin, was a whisperer.

I was confused, nervous, elated, sickened. He’d brought a whisperer straight to me... or perhaps the whisperer had led Kaidan. The human panty thief hadn’t worked. Neither had Marek or Caterina or the sons of Thamuz. So the Dukes sent Kaidan. That fact made me relieved in one major sense—they must not be suspicious of him. He was safe, for now.

So, what was Kaidan’s plan?

My pulse would not settle. Kaidan grabbed the edge of the door over my shoulder and stepped forward, moving us both into the room.

I realized I’d completely let down my guard when I felt his hand wrap around mine, successfully snapping my knife shut and slipping it into his own pocket. He gave the “flashlight” a funny look before pulling it from my grasp and dropping it to the floor. The door shut, and the whisperer pushed its way through it, watching as Kaidan backed me against the wall.

With the spirit watching, I had to pretend I didn’t love him, just as he was doing, even if it hurt. In normal life I couldn’t stomach lying. But where whisperers and Dukes were concerned, all bets were off.

I put my palms on Kaidan’s chest and straightened my arms, giving him my fiercest look. His red starburst pumped.

“Back off, son of Pharzuph,” I warned.

A predatory grin spread across his handsome face, and the repulsive whisperer sidled closer.

“I’m only here as a precaution,” Kaidan crooned. “To be sure our little daughter of Belial is behaving properly.” His voice sounded as it had during our first meetings—contemptuous and dark. It was so appropriate that they’d sent him, the son of Lust, to make sure I wasn’t a virgin. Letting my lust for him overcome me was something I could not do. If the heavenly hilt, the Sword of Righteousness, sensed any lack of purity of heart, it wouldn’t allow me to wield it. I had to be angelic to use an angel relic.

“I heard you don’t even like Neph girls,” I countered.

He laughed, swishing hair from his eyes with a flick of his head and stepping forward again. “I don’t. But I’m willing to make sacrifices for the greater evil.”

I swallowed hard. He was convincing. Too convincing.

He’s just putting on a show, I told myself.

“So, what are you saying?” I asked. “The Dukes don’t think I’m working? Is that why they’re sending every Neph to question me and fight me?”

His pause at my mention of other Neph was minuscule, but I knew him well enough to catch it.

“Just covering all the bases. They know you’re pushing alcohol, but you weren’t exactly a well-rounded worker at that summit, yeah?”

“That was a year and a half ago,” I ground out. “I’m very well-rounded now.”

“Prove it.”

His mouth hit mine with a wave of warm, citrusy pheromones and his body pressed me to the wall. I’d forgotten about my shoulder blade until a dull crest of pain coursed through me, and I whimpered. I felt him hesitate, as if he might stop to ask what was wrong, but then he kept going.

I wanted to sink into the touch of him, but a disgusting gurgling purr sounded in my brain from the whisperer, who was watching way too closely. Kaidan broke from the kiss long enough to glare at the spirit.

“Bit of a turnoff when you do that,” he told it. “Mind shutting up?” The whisperer snarled, and Kaidan was kissing me again—hard, firm kisses.

This was nothing like the making out we’d done at his apartment in L.A. He was all physical business now—nothing more. I trusted him, but my feelings wavered as clothes began to shed. He took his shirt off in one swift move. When he reached for my shirt, I wanted so badly to stop him because I wasn’t wearing a bra. I forced myself not to protest or cover myself as he unceremoniously yanked the top over my head and kissed my mouth again, roughly, pure lust, our bare chests touching.

The desperate, self-conscious part of me wondered what he thought of my body. It was strange not to have him taking time to savor me like I knew he could. Like I knew he enjoyed.

At that moment I imagined I could smell the rancid breath of the whisperer in our space, making me bitter and nervous. We had to get that thing away from us.

Kaidan’s mouth found the curve where my shoulder met my neck, and I felt his warm hands dip fully into the back of my pajama bottoms, his hands cupping my butt, pushing my underwear down my thighs.

My heart rate tripled. How far was he going to let this go?

“Take them off,” he said.

For the first time I hesitated and wanted to cry. I’d always wondered if I’d be naked with Kaidan someday, but never under these circumstances. Unleashing my emotions, I snapped, “You don’t have to be such an ass.”

His brief laugh was a dark sound as he pushed me onto the bed, grasping my bottoms and pulling them down my legs, tossing them away and leaving me bare. His whole body tensed as his eyes landed on the faded, greenish bruises across my shins. A quick survey of my skin showed I had bruises everywhere. Kaidan recovered quickly, his jaw set in hard lines.

He kept his eyes on my knees or stomach after that. The red badge at his sternum was as large as I’d ever seen it, spinning and pulsing. I wished for one soft glance from Kai—one glimpse of the boy who loved me. When his gaze finally met mine for the briefest second, it was all heat and anger.

I pressed my knees together, shocked that I lay naked in front of Kaidan Rowe and he seemed not to care. He stood at the end of the bed, unclasping his belt, which made his cargo shorts droop low on his hips. I had to swallow as he unzipped them.

This isn’t happening. I took a cue from his playbook and appeared slightly uninterested, keeping my eyes on his chest as his shorts dropped to the floor. Don’t look, Anna, I told myself.

Kaidan Rowe was nude, in all his glory, and I had to pretend to be unfazed. I couldn’t be caught gawking as if it was something I’d never seen. Which I hadn’t, and didn’t want to now. Not like this.

He won’t do it, I told myself. He won’t. Not like this. He loves you.

This was exactly the position Kaidan and I swore to never let ourselves get in. Naked. Together. I had no doubt in my mind that his father had sent him and the spirit. The consequence of refusing his father’s will would be death. Was I willing to go all the way in this moment to save him? Even if it meant I couldn’t wield the Sword of Righteousness—the only weapon that would help us get rid of the demons? Kaidan or the world. What kind of choice was that?

Please, please, please, I begged. Get us out of this.

Kaidan came toward me. When the whisperer made that gross, guttural purring sound again, I scrunched my nose. Panic and frustration made me speak out.

“Do you have to be here?” I asked it. “You’re really distracting.”

Shut up, it said to me. As if I want to be here with you boring Neph.

“Then leave,” Kaidan said. “We’re almost finished here. Anyway, I think you’d find room 108 far more interesting.”

This seemed to catch the spirit’s interest, and for the first time since Kai and the whisperer entered, I felt a spike of hope. The demon froze and then bobbed up and down.

You won’t tell? it asked.

“Tell what?” Kaidan said with impatience. “You did what you bloody came to do—you saw me find the girl and assure she’s impure. Your job is done, and I can finish mine much better if you’re not hovering.”

The spirit pondered this a few seconds before it turned with a swish and flew through the walls, disappearing.

I was afraid to breathe. We stared at the blank wall in silence for a full minute before Kaidan collapsed on the bed next to me, shoving his face into a pillow and hollering. I climbed beneath the blanket and tossed a pillow over his chiseled, naked butt.

My heart was beating too fast, and the thoughts in my head were too murky to decipher. When Kaidan reached an arm over and pulled himself closer, burying his face in the blanket at my lap, I was afraid to touch him.

“I would have stopped, Anna.” His voice was a thick whisper, causing tears to streak down each of my cheeks. “I swear. I’d die before I took you against your will. Please tell me you believe me.”

“I believe you.” And I did, but it had still been a scary, desperate moment that left me trembling. I was furious with the Dukes for putting us through this. What if we hadn’t been able to talk the whisperer into leaving? Things were going too far. Something would have to give. And soon.

I swiped the tears from my cheeks and pushed my fingers into his hair, knowing full well the whisperer could return at any moment. We couldn’t keep touching like this.

“Get under the covers with me,” I said. “We need to lie here for a little while in case it comes back.”

Kaidan looked up at me, showing all the emotion he’d so expertly kept hidden in the presence of the spirit. His expression made everything inside me come to life.

“There you are,” I whispered, stroking his cheek until I was awarded with a tired, small grin.

He sat up, shifting the pillow over his lap until he was under the blanket. We lay side by side, quiet, both our chests rising and falling too fast. Kaidan trembled before seeming to suddenly remember something. He shot up and took my arm, running a hand over the bruises.

“Anna...” Here we go. “What. The bloody hell. Happened? Who did this to you?”

I swallowed hard. “Listen, Kai. I’m all right now, okay?”

“Who?”

His breathing became faster, a raging storm brewing.

“The sons of Thamuz.”

His mouth went slack. “What did they do? I swear to God—”

“Nothing. They tried to take me, but I fought. And... Kope showed up.”

“Kope?”

“Yeah.” Kaidan was not going to like this story. I braced myself, and told him everything. He looked ready to blow a fuse.

“You should have called me,” he said.

“I thought you were in L.A. There wasn’t much time, and I didn’t want you to be worried. I was going to tell you everything afterward.”

He rubbed his face. “I can’t... I just... Anna, swear you’ll never engage another Neph like that. You’re bloody lucky Kope showed! God, what would I do? Look at you!”

He pushed my hair aside and cursed at the sight of my shoulder and back.

“I’d no clue you were injured,” he whispered. “I was too rough....”

“I’m okay. I swear. You had to be rough. It was more convincing that way.”

“I’ll kill them.”

“Sh.” I pulled Kaidan back down to lie next to me and watched him breathe as he worked through his anger.

After ten minutes I said, “We can probably get up now, right? I think that’s long enough to get the job done.”

My words pulled him from his dark thoughts enough to make him chuckle. “Ah, luv, I’d certainly hope not.”

It was a relief to hear him joking. We sat up, and just as I was about to ask if he thought the spirit would come back, he turned and kissed me for real, cupping my face. I gripped his shoulders, gasping at the feel of our bare chests meeting as our passion urged us closer. I forced myself to pull back.

“Oh, God,” he said. “Clothes. Now.”

“You first,” I said.

“Look away,” he advised. “Unless you want an eyeful.”

I turned my head, partly out of embarrassment and partly because if I let my curiosity get the best of me and he caught me staring, he might attack. And I might let him.

My head snapped up when I heard Kaidan curse, and I found him standing there shirtless, facing the same hovering spirit that had left us ten minutes earlier.

“Yes, I’m obviously done,” Kaidan said to it, sounding bored.

The spirit turned toward me, and even though my chest was covered by the blanket, I wanted to pull it up higher. I didn’t dare move.

The spirit must have said something else telepathically to Kai, because he responded in a snide tone, “You do that.”

When the spirit flew away, Kaidan let out a breath and said in a low voice, “He’s gone to tell Pharzuph.”

I swallowed a dry lump and nodded. Kai bent to pick up my discarded clothes and tossed them to me before disappearing into the bathroom.

The whole time I dressed, a question continued churning inside me: Kaidan or the world? I’d been spared making that choice today, but it seemed inevitable that I’d have to eventually. Could I do the right thing if it meant Kaidan would lose his life? Tears threatened to fall again, but I fought them back, putting on a strong face and closing my eyes.

Please, God. Don’t make me choose.

Дата добавления: 2015-10-21