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Do something that makes you happy.

Now the Venusians Love to Feel Worthy | While the Venusian Is Ready the Martian Will Appear | LEARNING TO GIVE | Martians Need Love Too | Speaking Different Languages | EXPRESSING FEELINGS VS EXPRESSING INFORMATION | WHEN VENUSIANS TALK | Understanding the Cave | Why Men Go To Their Caves | Getting Burned by the Dragon |


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If you need to "talk," write him a letter to be read later when he is out, and if you need to be nurtured, talk to a friend. Don't make him the sole source of your fulfillment.

A man wants his favorite Venusian to trust that he can handle what is bothering him. To be trusted that he can handle his problems is very important to his honor, pride, and self-esteem. Not worrying about him is difficult for her. Worrying for others is one way women express their love and caring. It is a way of showing love. For a woman, being happy when the person you love is upset just doesn't seem right. He certainly doesn't want her to be happy becausehe is upset, but he does want her to be happy. He wants her to be happy so that he has one less problem to worry about. In addition he wants her to be happy because it helps him to feel loved by her. When a woman is happy and free from worry, it is easier for him to come out. Ironically men show their love by not worrying. A man questions "How can you worry about someone whom you admire and trust?". Men commonly support one another by saying phrases such as "Don't worry, you can handle it" or "That's their problem, not yours" or "I'm sure it will work out.". Men support one another by not worrying or minimizing their troubles. It took me years to understand that my wife actually wanted me to worry for her when she was upset. Without this awareness of our different needs, I would minimize the importance of her concerns. This only made her more upset.

When a man goes into his cave he is generally trying to solve a problem. If his mate is happy or not needy at this time, then he has one less problem to solve before coming out. Knowing that she is happy with him also gives him more strength to deal with his problem while in the cave. Anything that distracts her or helps her to feel good will be helpful to him. These are some examples:


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SIX COMMON ABBREVIATED WARNING SIGNALS| Now to Approach a Man With Criticism or Advice

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