I knew my nerves wouldn't let me do anything besides biting my nails and shaking my legs during those twenty minutes that I had to wait. I turned the TV on, keeping the volume low not to wake up Frankie. It wasn't of any help; going through all the existing channels at least five times only made me more anxious.
I spent the remaining minutes sauntering the room and glaring at my watch. When it finally signaled that it was, indeed, twenty minutes later, I practically jumped to the phone. However, when I was about to call, I felt a pair of arms holding me from behind and a pair of lips kissing behind my ear.
"Hey, pretty babe!" I turned to kiss him. He stared at me with sleepy eyes, his shin on my shoulder. "I just have to make a call and then I'll be all yours, ok?"
"K-kay."
I hadn't even found the redial button -nerves blurring my vision and screwing up my pulse- when Frankie grabbed my face, kissed my cheek and then the side of my mouth.
"L-love you." he whispered seductively.
"I love you too, Frankie, a lot. But I really need to make this call, just a minute..."
"K-kay, meanie!" he sat up quietly, his eyes still fixed on me. Again I turned my attention to the phone and pressed the button, but Frankie suddenly climbed on my lap, making me drop the handset to the floor.
"Frankie...ENOUGH! I told you to please wait, I'm busy! We have the whole night, so why the rush? I love you, but you have to understand when I'm being serious!" I spat annoyed, guilt hitting me like a huge piano on my head as soon as I saw his face. He withdrew from me to the opposite side of the couch and his eyes filled with tears.
I truly hated myself in those situations, when I'd let my nerves dominate me and I'd forget who I was talking to. Of course he didn't mean to disobey, even less bother me. He was only showing his love for me and I had pushed him away like the worst asshole.
"S-sorry. N-now you're an-angry and don't l-love me." he murmured sadly.
" I am the one who's sorry, Frankie, I was a jerk. Of course I love you." I reached out for his hand but he didn't take mine. I heard a voice coming from the receiver and I picked it up.
"Hello?" a man asked.
"Oh yes, sorry...I dropped the phone, just a minute!" I explained. I stared at Frank imploringly. "Please?" I mouthed, beckoning for him to get closer. When I saw him move, wiping away his tears, I patted my lap. He got the sign and rested his head on it.
"I'm here now. Sorry again, I just had a little...problem. Mister Hawkins?" I spoke on the phone as I twirled Frankie's hair with my fingers.
"Yes, I am. And don't worry, who am I speaking to?"
"I'm Gerard Way. Do you remember a woman called Grace Neil?" I asked, a little more relaxed hearing Alexander's friendly voice.
"I do, my cousin contacted us."
"She wanted to find out about Alice Caravaggio and Frank Iero..." I continued, demonstrating my knowledge on the subject. Upon hearing his name, Frankie looked up at me. With my index finger on my lips I told him to be silent.
"Aha. I consulted some colleagues and got some information about the woman, but I didn't have Grace's number and she didn't call me again."
"Oh, I know. She got in trouble at work due to using the phone for personal matters. She lives there and doesn't have a cellphone at the moment." I didn't give out many details. I couldn't tell him Grace had been nearly menaced if I expected the guy to speak. "That's why she told me to call you now. What could you find out?"
"Well...this woman, Alice Caravaggio, was in a very good financial situation. She died about two years ago and had written a legal testament, a will, establishing the destination for her money and possessions."
"Oh..." was all I managed to voice, many things already making sense in my head. All of the ideas I came up with were baleful. "Do you know anything else about that will?"
"She bequeathed her last house to her daughter. Any other properties had to be sold and the money kept in the bank with the rest. All that was left to her grandson, Frank Iero. However, it was stated that this relative is mentally ill. For that reason he can't dispose of the money, even after turning the legal age."
"And what did she decide then?" I interrupted, interested but confused. Frankie was still giving me that same questioning look.
"She designated a procurator who would make sure that the institution where her grandson was received the payment every month, for life, plus some more money for extra needs or spendings."
"But...why did they stop receiving it after two years of her death?" I asked.
"I don't know about that, I'd have to investigate further and locate the procurator. Since this woman Grace never called again, I didn't venture more into it."
"I understand. Could you try now? It's really important." I requested. It was a great chance to get to the truth. I had an hypothesis, but it wouldn't be of any use if I couldn't prove it.
"I'll try, I can't promise anything. Would you give me your number? It's a lot easier when I can contact people."
"Of course." I gave him both the numbers of my house and my cellphone. Then Alexander excused himself politely, saying he had things to do.
I was left overburdened, feeling like my brain was so swollen that it didn't fit inside my skull. Too much information, too many words. Specially one word bothering me; the one that would always complicate things, the one that could drive some people to do the unthinkable: money.
When money was involved, anything was possible.
"G-gee...can I k-kiss you now?" Frank's soft voice chased my bitterness away.
"Of course you can, my love. Come here." I sat him on my lap, closed my eyes and kissed him. Not thinking, only feeling. His lips on mine, his skin under my fingers as I caressed his face. No amount of money could ever replace that. What we had was invaluable.
Money, so they say,
is the root of all evil today.
CHAPTER 37
But every time I look at you,
no matter what I'm going through, it's easy to see.
And every time I hold you,
the things I never told you seem to come easily...
cause you're everything to me.
That Monday morning I left in a hurry. The day at the zoo had left me very tired, and the news I'd gotten through the phone hadn't helped either. It had been hard to fall asleep even if my body was imploring me to do it. Ray had been tempted to stay in bed too. He'd fought the temptation and won, but the battle was hard and long. He arrived later than usual -too late to save me from oversleeping- looking as if the pillow was still stuck to his face. There was no time for talking, so I decided to wait until my return to fill Ray in about what Hawkins had told me.
Frankie hadn't been awake at the time I left for work, so when I came back in the afternoon he almost threw me to the floor. He and Puppy seemed to have plotted against me. While I was trying to maintain my balance with Frank clinging to me like a koala, the dog painfully bit my calf.
"Uh...hello, love!" I greeted my boyfriend.
"M-missed you, m-meanie!"
"Woah! Why am I a meanie?" I asked, not understanding. "And tell Puppy I'm not a bone for him to gnaw on!"
"Frankie got angry because you weren't home when he woke up, we had a little huff here. He wanted me to take him to see you, but I finally explained things and he understood." Ray said.
"S-still angry and s-so is Puppy!"
"You didn't seem angry when we made hamburgers and fries..." Ray laughed.
"Oh! So that's how you really convinced him. Though...hamburgers again, Ray? Isn't it too much junk food?" I questioned. Ray gave me a funny look. "I know, I sound like my mother but...I think it's enough for this week."
"S-see that you're m-mean?" Frank punched me.
"How mean?" I trapped him in between my arms.
" V-very! L-lemme go!"
"Sure you want me to let you go?" I whispered in his ear, and he shuddered. I loved when he'd do that.
"Uhm..."
"I think someone's anger is evaporating too fast..." Ray sang.
"Do I let you go? Do I hold you tighter? Choose now!" I kept him in my arms, but spun him so he was facing me. He bit his lip, the annoyance far gone.
"H-hold me t-tighter but...n-no, wait!" he pushed us apart a little with his hand. "K-kiss me too or...or I w-won't forgive you!"
"As if you needed to ask him that..." I heard Ray murmur. He was always saying we were 'over-sugared'.
"Shh...shut up, Ray! Anyway he's right really, Frankie. You didn't need to ask me that. The 'hold you tighter' option already featured a kiss."
"Y-yeah?"
"Yep! Like this one." I pulled him closer until our bodies were fully touching and we shared one of those breath taking, slow, long kisses.
"What about that call last night?" Ray asked once Frankie and I broke apart.
"I have some news but..." I signaled to Frank with my head. He'd turned the TV on, but appeared to be more interested in our conversation.
"Oh, leave it to me, I'm always well equipped!" Ray grabbed his backpack and took a small game console out of it. An old Nintendo, together with a legendary Mario cartridge.
"He knows how to play that?" I inquired.
"Yes, he does. He didn't tell you?"
"No, he didn't...that's weird."
"Oh, f-forgot!" Frank smiled. There were things or situations he would remember every detail of, while he'd totally forget others.
"I found my old consoles last week and brought them. We tried them all, but Frankie got a little frustrated with the newer ones. The magnificent, old Nintendo was the best option." he commented triumphantly.
"Y-yeah didn't un-understand the o-others, this one's e-easier. I d-die a lot, a-anyway, but it's f-fun." he nodded. "P-plug it, Ray!"
"I'm doing it!"
As soon as it was all plugged in, Frankie got lost among bricks, coins and pipes. The look of concentration on his face was something very amusing to behold, same as the random way in which he'd press all the buttons when he didn't know what to do.
"Let's go to the kitchen, we don't have much time. "Ray suggested. "He loves it, but gets tired of it fast."
"That's good, at least he won't become addicted to it, don't you think?" I laughed, even though it was sometimes a problem how soon Frank would get tired of most activities.
******
After I told Ray everything, he remained silent, thoughtful. He hadn't liked what he heard.
"Gerard...you should stop now. Just live your life and take care of Frankie, forget about his past." he said shortly.
"What? I can't stop! I need to know why things happened the way they did, why there was so much shit against the poor boy! I want to do it for Frankie."
"I know Gee but...it's about money. When there's money involved, there's danger. Specially with that mafia-man Frank's mother has with her." he justified his opinion.
"I'm not going to do anything, at least for now. I'm just trying to find out, nothing's gonna happen by just asking around. Linda and that asshole must be hiding somewhere far away." I replied.
"You can't be so sure. See...I know you're a stubborn bastard, and probably nothing I could tell you is going make you change your mind; but please be careful. Don't go too far, you can't fix the past. You're helping make Frankie's present better. That's more important, don't ruin it..." he insisted.
"I'll be careful, I promise. I'm only going to wait for this guy to call me again, that's all."
"Gerard..." Ray sighed, but said nothing else.
"G-gee, Ray! I...I'm b-bored already, come h-here?" Frankie called us. I was glad to end that conversation. Even if I knew that there could be some danger, I felt like I had to know more.
"You abandoned Mario?" I sat with him.
"Y-yeah, wanna d-do another th-thing."
"I'm gonna go take a shower now, maybe you'll play a little longer if Ray plays with you? It's more fun that way..."
"Oh about that...I can't wait until you shower today, Gee. My dad just texted and he needs me now. I'm sure Frankie will behave in the meantime, right boy?" Ray ruffled his hair. The random thought of how long Frank's hair was crossed my mind. I loved it, but he would rarely accept to brush it so it was a real mess.
"Y-yes, I'll be g-good. B-but...Gee takes t-too much time, he sh-should hurry up."
"I will, I will!" I protested. Now Frankie was the one sounding like my mother.
When Ray left, I went for some clean clothes and got into the bathroom. Frankie was watching some cartoons and I knew I'd have to be quick. He did behave a lot better than before, but I still didn't trust him alone for too long. It was better to prevent accidents when possible.
I turned on the water -barely warm- and got under the shower. I was soaking my hair when I heard the door open. Poking my head from one side of the curtain I saw Frankie standing there, clean clothes folded against his chest.
"Do you need something, Frankie?" I asked.
"C-can I shower w-with you? P-Please?"
"Uh..." I had no excuse. There was no reason to tell him 'no', specially after how he'd asked for it. It might even be something good, it could help us feel more comfortable around each other. On top of that, we'd save time and I'd have one less problem -or two: no more asking Ray to stay while I showered, and no more worrying about Frankie getting hurt in the bathroom by himself.
"Ok, come in."
"I'm d-dressed, silly. W-wait!" Frank laughed. He left what he was holding over the toilet together with his glasses, and quickly took off his clothes. As he walked towards the bathtub, my eyes didn't wait for permission. He was so pretty, so...delicate. His angelical face, slender shoulders and chest, his slightly rounded belly and feminine hips. He was mostly hairless except for the thin trail of hair that started under his deep belly button and ended there, where I diverted my glance, looking at his legs instead. They were short, but well proportioned. Small feet, just like him. Small, beautiful, and naked in front of me.
Looking into his eyes, I opened the curtain and offered him my hand. He didn't move at first, and I could sense that he was watching me too. I felt so weird, even more naked than I was, my old insecurities coming back all together. But he smiled and took my hand, stepping into the shower with me. Everything was alright again.
We froze under the falling water, our eyes locked until Frank's hair got wet and fell on his face, interrupting his view. He raised both hands and ran them through his locks, fixing them back. His perfect features became visible, adorned and highlighted by the cascading drops. Hazel orbs spying me through dripping eyelashes, eyes as perfect to me as everything that surrounded them. Frankie knew that and would never avoid my look; he would return it, unashamed.
He tiptoed and kissed my nose, grinning like a little child. Then he grabbed my face and kissed my lips. I placed my hands on his hips, loving the sensation but trying to stay cool. Instead of bringing him closer, I kept my arms semi extended so our bodies would not meet. It was the first time we were totally naked together, and I didn't think it convenient. I didn't want a nice moment to turn awkward.
After a tender, moist kiss, things were completely normal. We washed ourselves while singing some random tunes, having fun and laughing. I shampooed his hair, he lathered my back. I stepped aside every time Frankie went under the shower to flush the soap and shampoo away, avoiding accidental grazes.
When we were done, I left the bathtub first and helped him out; throwing the big, white towel over his shoulders. Then I took a smaller one and dried his hair. He could perfectly do it himself, but I needed to coddle my boyfriend. He giggled and seemed extremely happy, and I knew that I wanted it to be like that forever.
All along the week we shared the shower. When I told Ray that he wouldn't need to stay any longer once I was home, he didn't like the reason much. He opined that I was putting myself in a very compromising situation, that I'd have to be twice as strong. I'd been, so far. There had been some days when Frank and I explored each other a little more, since that was still something new for us; the feeling of the other's skin under our fingers and how different it tasted. It was sensual, inviting. Yet my infallible self control had persisted. I didn't know how I'd succeeded at having such dominion over my own body, but I had. And it wasn't such a struggle anymore, it didn't mean suffering to me. It didn't matter how far we'd get. I'd always enjoy our intimate moments and it'd always feel enough in the end.
Frankie, on the other hand, would never try to control his feelings or sensations. He was spontaneous. He was discovering a new world, feeling things he had never felt before and couldn't even fully understand. He wouldn't attempt to, he'd just follow his instincts. Other times he'd be oblivious to his body reactions. It had happened a couple of times that week, and I'd pretended not to see while we kept playing around with shampoo bubbles.
Before that change in our routine, Frank would often complain about showering. He wouldn't do it everyday because I didn't want to force him. Needless to say, he never refused to shower again.
*******
Ray had printed out a lot of the pictures from our day at the zoo. When Frank saw them, his happiness was so immense that it didn't fit into his small body. He kept jumping, shrieking, clapping hands and laughing. He'd ran for transparent tape and adhered some of the photos to the closet's door. I kept one that showed Frank and me together and another one with the four of us -which we'd asked someone to take. I bought some fancy, colored frames to put them in display over a shelf, for everybody to see as soon as they entered the house.
I'd had no news from Hawkins and was about to agree with Ray; it might be better if the guy didn't call me again. Maybe I should take it as a sign and forget about it all. Curiosity, as well as that need for justice, were still inside of me; but if Alexander didn't call I would not insist.
It was Saturday and for the first time -apart from when Frank and I stopped there for a night- we were going to visit my mother's house. Of course, Mikey and Alicia would be present too.
We arrived and Frankie ran to the door, ringing the bell before I could even get out of the car. Once I caught up with him, I saw Alicia hug him so tightly that Frank's feet were in the air.
"Hey babe, you're getting heavier!" she told him, treating him like a baby as usual. The funny thing was that Frankie liked to be treated that way. Or at least he liked certain people doing it.
"Ouch, Al...you shouldn't have said that." I flinched.
"W-why you're all s-so mean? I...I'm n-not fat!" Frank protested.
"Oh...no, Frankie! I didn't mean that! Of course you're not. You were a little too thin before, now you're more...adorable and cuddly...and pinchable!" she kissed his cheek.
"R-really?"
"Really really! And boy, you look prettier every time I see you. Gerard takes good care of you, uh?"
"Y-yes! He l-loves me lots. I l-love him a l-lot too. Y-yeah. L-like my g-glasses?" he stood in front of her with the biggest smile. "Y-you hadn't seen th-them!"
"They're lovely! Don't tell Mikey, but your glasses are so much cooler than his!"
"L-let's not t-tell him, yeah...he w-would get angry and...a-and he doesn't like me m-much."
"Mikey does like you, he's just a little grumpy." my mom appeared, attacking Frank's cheek with motherly kisses.
"H-hiii! B-brought you this." Frankie handed her one of our photographs. He'd refused to buy a frame. With a little of help from me, he had made his own out of pink colored cardboard and drawn flowers all around it. My mother stared at the handmade gift in silence. Her eyes watered as a meaningful smile formed on her lips.
"G-gee helped me c-cut it cause I can't use s-scissors, but I g-glued it and m-made all the d-drawings." Frank explained thrilled. When he saw that my mom had tears in her eyes, he worried.
"D-donna...you d-don't like it? W-want me to m-make it again?"
"No, Frankie! It's perfect, I love it!" she answered, sitting down and pulling Frank on her lap.
"Th-then why you c-crying?" he ran a shaky finger under my mother's eye.
"Because...I'm a silly old woman that cries when she's too happy!" she studied the frame again. "You both look so pretty here. I'm sorry that I was too busy this week and we couldn't talk about the zoo! Did you enjoy it?"
"Oh, true! I want to hear about it too!" Alicia jumped into the scene.
"Be prepared, you're in for a long report!" I laughed. Frankie loved to have an 'audience' and something interesting to tell them. It'd take him some time due to his speech impediment, but he was enthusiastic and it was pleasant to hear him.
"Th-the Zoo w-was so so so g-good! L-lemme tell you a-all!"
He related every detail about that day to them; everything we did, everything he felt. He moved his hands a lot while talking and if you looked at his face, he seemed to be reliving it all.
At one point of his zoo review, Mikey entered the room. Frankie didn't see him and my brother didn't want to interrupt him, so he just stood where he was. Once in a while I'd take my eyes off Frankie to set them on Mikey, who was listening to him with his lips curved into a sincere smile; really paying attention to what Frank was saying. He suddenly saw me watching him and looked down. I waited for him to look back up and I arched my eyebrows, getting a giggle as response. Brotherly mute language.
Frank finished his story and turned to Mikey, only then realising he was there.
"Hello, kiddo! You're good at relating outings!" Mikey petted his hair.
"H-hello, Mikey." he replied timidly, looking at his own hands.
"What's wrong, Frankie?" my brother tried to grab Frank's chin trying, but the boy eluded him.
"Why don't you want to look at Mikey, baby? I told you, he does like you." my mom talked to him who was still on her lap.
"M-mikey doesn't like m-me looking at h-him." he shook his head.
"Oh...I'm sorry, Frankie...for real. I know I was a little too moody last time you saw me, but it's fine. Of course you can look at me." Mikey knelt in front of them and waited until Frank raised his eyes. "That's better. Friends? Well, you're also like...my brother in law now, since you're my bro's boyfriend!"
"Y-YES, FRIENDS AND B-BROTHERS IN...WH-WHATEVER!" Frank screamed, kissing Mikey's cheek.
"I still kinda think you're a crazy, mindless fucker, but the boy's not to blame." Mikey got up and spoke in my ear.
"If you say so..." I chuckled. I knew he wasn't angry, and I was sure that he trusted me. He just wouldn't admit that he worried about Frankie, even if it was obvious. Mikey loved to play tough.
******
We were sitting at the table, waiting for my mother to serve lunch. She had expressed that she felt bad for not having had time to cook a more elaborated meal, but we assured her that it wasn't important. It was about having a good time together after all. The menu was grilled chicken breasts and smashed potatoes and pumpkins. The smell coming from the kitchen told us it'd be delicious.
Among the regular bread over the table, there was a lonely cheese bun. I had been observing amused how Frankie eyed it, not daring to make a move. Eventually, he wasn't able to resist anymore and reached out for it...at the same time that Mikey did.
"M-MINE! G-GIMME!" Frankie shouted at him, both tugging at the bun.
"No way, saw it first and it's my house, dwarf!"
"N-NOT A DWARF AND I S-SAW IT FIRST. L-LIKE IT, G-GIMME!"
"Mikey...please." I said, hoping my glare was enough for him to get the idea.
"DON'T 'Mikey please' me, that boy can't have everything he wants." he retorted.
"You eat them almost everyday, come on!"
"No I don't, mom made them for a neighbor and only left a couple here and I wasn't home." he excused himself childishly, still fighting for the prize.
"IT...IT'S M-MINE, ASSHOLE! Y-YOU SAID WE...W-WE WERE F-FRIENDS!"
"Yeah we are, but you must learn that you can't get everything you want, kid!"
"F-FUCK YOU! M-MINE, PLEASEE!"
"Mikey, give me that!" Alicia tried to snatch it but they got up from the table, still not releasing the bun.
"Can you tell me what's happening here?" my mother entered the dining room.
"M-mikey doesn't w-want to gimme the ch-cheese thingie and...and I s-saw it first!" Frankie accused my brother, while trying to force open his fingers with his free hand.
"It's my bun, and he's a spoiled brat." Mikey said furious. "AND FUCKING LEAVE MY FINGERS ALONE!"
"TH-THEN GIMME OR TH-THE LITTLE P-PEOPLE WILL B-BREAK THEM! TH-THEY'RE HERE A-AND THEY D-DON'T LIKE YOU!"
"MICHAEL! Can you behave like an adult, please? This is...unbelievable."
"Donna's right, Mikey...do you realise the way you're acting?" Alicia hit the back of her boyfriend's head.
" I have to behave like an adult? For your information, I'm only one year older than Frank!"
" F-FRANKIE, YOU...I-IDIOT!"
"You know you're not making sense, Mikey. You understood what I meant, don't play fool with me." mom was really serious now.
"Whatever, take it. Happy?" he let go of his prey and Frankie ran back to the table, beaming.
Mikey sulked like the immature kid he'd sometimes be. One moment he was bossing me around and saying that I made him feel like the big brother. The next one he could be fighting over any stupid thing like a 5-year old. Annoying, to say the least. Frankie was about to bring the bun to his mouth, but stopped to look at Mikey.
"Don't mind him, he'll get over it." I whispered to him. He nodded, but kept staring. Suddenly, he parted the cheesy bread in two and after studying the halves, he left the slightly bigger one on his plate.
"M-Mikey?" he called him.
"W-what?" Mikey mumbled.
"Y-you can h-have this 'cause..'c-cause maybe we s-saw it at the s-same time." Frank offered him the other half. "A-and...Grace said sh-sharing is good." he added blushing, seemingly ashamed. Surely not as much as Mikey.
"Oh...uh...no...it's ok, Frankie. Sorry for wanting to keep it."
"T-take it?" Frank insisted.
"Ok, thank you."
"F-friends again?"
"Yes, kiddo, friends again." Mikey smiled showing his teeth and both 'kids' ate their bun in peace.
It was evident that Mikey felt guilty after that, since he kept trying hard to be nice. Food was served and he cut the chicken for Frankie. When Frank started eating, grabbing the fork with both hands, the other boy was dubious.
"We could help you, you know? You don't need to be doing such weird maneuvers to eat..." Mikey let out.
"N-NO. I c-can, see?"
"Ok! Jesus! And I am the moody one!"
"Don't take it personally, Mikey, he always gets angry whenever we offer to help him. He's a grown boy and likes to eat by himself, which is very understandable." my mother excused him.
"Oh, now he's a grown boy?" Mikey snickered.
"Don't start again..."
"I was joking, mom."
"Sure you were..." Alicia glanced at him.
"Ouch! Stop hurting me, woman!" he yelled. I wasn't sure of what she'd done to him under the table.
"Then start acting your age or I'll make you wear diapers, bib and a pacifier...then take pics and post them all over the net." she menaced. Frankie, my mom and I exploded in laughter just imagining that.
"Ok, Miss maturity." Mikey kissed Alicia's lips and grinned like an idiot at her. I wondered if I had that same silly face when I looked at Frank.
"Oh b-but...but I w-wanted to see b-baby Mikey!" Frank pouted.
"Maybe one day...maybe one day!" the girl laughed witch-style.
"Would you eat before it gets cold, children?" Donna asked, hitting the fork against her plate for attention. I bet she felt like a kindergarten teacher.
Дата добавления: 2015-11-04; просмотров: 19 | Нарушение авторских прав
| <== предыдущая лекция | | | следующая лекция ==> |