How to bridge the generation gap?

What is a family? A family is first of all the people, closest to you: relatives and parents. They always support you; they love you with all your merits and demerits. Taking care of you from your first days, they are used to treating you like a baby. Naturally, it irritates you once in a while; so you try to prove you are not a silly child any more. At the age of 15-16 you begin to form your own idea of life, but adults get their message across. What for? Although their care sometimes embarrasses us (teenagers, in front of our mates) they stubbornly and whole-heartedly try to do something good for us. Sometimes you want to answer: "Keep out of my room! Leave me alone!" But you cannot, because of the "generation gap". This phrase means that now you want to be alone, you do not want to continue objecting and arguing. But for your parents it is an outrage! Unfortunately, not all grown-ups can understand their children. If you are on good terms with your mother and father, if they are your best friends, it is a big advantage; because for many today's teenagers the lack of comprehension between different generations is a big problem. Not all of them can talk with adults about their boyfriend - or girlfriend, about somebody's mad house-party, about an American youth comedy you've seen today or about a super-mini-skirt... Surely, they will start nagging you about your interests, awaiting aims, the harmful impact of TV on your young sensitive mind, your laziness, your slow progress and the job of a janitor you are going to have according to their prediction. Their favourite phrase is: "It doesn't matter to me whether other teenagers do it or not! You'll not do the things you want till you're at least 18!" So, if you want to be more independent, try to make friends with your parents. Ask them a question about their own youth: relations with their parents, the places where they spent free time, the scope of their freedom. Giving you examples from their life, they will understand your standpoint better. For instance the grown-ups of 70's didn't enjoy "Boney M", while it was the favourite band of Soviet youth. Then why is Eminem, Madonna or Aria bad? Sometimes grown-ups try to make friends with their children. They start asking you what you are up to about your school, friends, relations with them and problems. It is not bad when you need their help, support, understanding, but sometimes it is really terrible. One of them can go through all your stuff, looking for a secret diary, or pick up the phone extension and listen to your talk with a friend... They will be shocked if they learn, for example, that the person you are going out with is 10 years your senior. The best way to avoid such situations is to invite your friends to your place and to create a dialogue between your parents and them. It is a good way to show that you have the same problems as other teenagers. Coming back to the theme of independence, I want to observe that it is the "generation gap" displayed in all its "beauty" that causes incomprehension, because relations in the family are built not only on mutual love and respect, but also on the dependence of a child on his/her parents. It is a weak-point of all fathers and, especially, mothers. This question is very delicate. If you want to prove that you are not a baby, keep trying to think and to act as adults do for some time; try to carry out all your fair share of duties, quickly, to the best of your ability, without any reminders from your parents' side. They will understand you better, if they see you taking responsibility. One more piece of advice. When you conflict with them don't be aggressive (what good is it?), because all your relations with people around you are greatly connected with their dispositions. Your voice should be gentle, your arguments earnest and explanations logical. If you are a very emotional person and cannot disguise your feelings, do not give up; do not get into a state! Make haste slowly! You must be interesting, clever and kind and everyone will associate with you!

Дата добавления: 2015-07-25