The subject change is quick, but there isn’t a moment when Levi isn’t on his mind. Erwin sinks in his chair, a little smile worming its way across his cheeks. Ardis warms too, the thought of Kiva humming in her chest, and they grant themselves this one luxury, to think of the ones they care for.
Erwin has fancied himself in love before, a long time ago. She hardly crosses his mind now – even before Levi was on the scene – and when she does feature in his thoughts, they are platonic. Erwin is glad that Mary is happy with Nile and their child, but he does wonder from time to time if things could have been different.
He remembers the way Ardis would avoid Mary’s daemon, a white fallow deer with splayed antlers and a shy disposition, Erwin’s nervousness shining through to his daemon. Ardis can now walk in step with Basil, though Yakira is quick to jog up and hiss at Ardis. Neither Ardis nor Erwin need Nile’s reminder, but he respects the jaguar’s warning and always steps away politely. Erwin is still a threat in Nile’s eyes and probably always will be.
Erwin remembers a time Yakira and Ardis used to chase each other through the barracks and how Nile would tell Erwin of his plans to outwit titans – they were supposed to join together. But Mary changed them all, Nile softened and Erwin can never blame him. Mary and Erwin were never destined – the idea was nice for a short time – and Erwin knows why.
“No one really knows what love is,” Erwin says and Ardis huffs, sitting down at last. “Levi’s the only one I’d trust with you.”
That’s as much a confession that Erwin will ever allow himself (for now). He’ll allow himself to let Levi know how much he likes him, respects him and treasures him, but love is something entirely different. Erwin isn’t free to love Levi, not with titans and humanity in their grip.
Maybe one day. Erwin wonders if that day will ever come though and, if it does, how much they’ll have lost by then.
And then he thinks that if he can say those words, anything is worth living through.
*
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[Erwin/Levi] Cedarwood 13b/? (Anonymous) - 2014-02-20 05:44 (UTC) - Expand
Re: [Erwin/Levi] Cedarwood 13b/? (Anonymous) - 2014-02-22 09:49 (UTC) - Expand
[Erwin/Levi] Cedarwood 14a/?
(Anonymous)
2014-02-27 02:20 am (UTC)(link)
Thank you for the feedback! I’m glad this story’s being enjoyed:) It will be edited and reposted on AO3 at some point, but I’m not 100% sure when. This chapter contains a little nipple play and frottage, so skip to the second part if that doesn’t strike your fancy! Have a great week/end and I shall see you in the next part.
Also a mention of child sex trafficking and an upcoming experimentation/torture scene of an OC in the next update.
*
Erwin can hear his heart in his ears and he thinks that blood is roaring through him with the ferocity of a stud stallion. His breath is heavy, nostrils flared slightly, and if this was anyone but Levi, Erwin would be ashamed of his lack of control, of his exposed animal, primal instincts. But this is Levi and he has nothing to fear. From the way Levi tilts his chin and slips his mantel to the ground, Erwin knows Levi has the same fire running through his capillaries.
Ardis and Kiva have made themselves scarce and Erwin wraps his fingers around Levi’s hips, pulling him close. They fall back onto the bed, Erwin half-sitting, half-laying, and Levi mounts his thighs with a flash of teeth, allowing Erwin’s hands to manoeuvre him as he leans forward for a kiss. It isn’t sweet, but full of malice and the skill of a soldier.
“Look at you,” Erwin whispers against Levi’s neck, fingers splaying and hands moving upwards until he can feel the slight ridges of Levi’s ribs. His skin is stretched tight over thick muscle and bone and yet Levi still shifts away at the ghost impressions Erwin leaves, sensitive to his touch.
Hissing quietly as Erwin’s fingers press against sensitive ribs, Levi arches his back unbuttoning his shirt slowly. Erwin watches with heavy lidded eyes, thumbs running over Levi’s abdomen, skin blossoming into gooseflesh under his finger pads. Levi’s shirt falls to the side and Erwin cranes his neck forward, Levi accommodating and warm under his lips.
Shifting on his lap, Erwin hears something different – something metallic – and he looks down. The keys he’s sent to Levi (keys he himself had to return) lay above Levi’s sternum and he smirks triumphantly. He has every bit of Erwin, there’s no mistaking that, and the keys clank against one another as he shifts, slipping his trousers off with a little difficulty. Erwin supports him, keeping Levi between his hands, eyes fixed on the keys.
Levi’s fingers are shaking as he moves them to Erwin’s chest and Erwin meets his eyes easily. He is not controlled by fear or nerves, but desire and Erwin sucks in a deep breath as Levis fingers press to his skin, slipping under his clothing. His hands slide over the musculature of his shoulders, freeing Erwin’s arms one by one, and Levi does it all with calm precision, keeping his distance from Erwin. That doesn’t mean Erwin can’t feel the tension in his body and he smirks as he feels Levi shift his hips a little more than necessary, cock hard and heavy against Erwin’s thigh.
“Did you ever go through an awkward teenage phase,” Levi says, the words murmured. He drops Erwin’s shirt to the side and pushes him down, wriggling against Erwin’s thigh. He sighs contentedly and Erwin figures the friction feels good – though not as good as he’ll make Levi feel later.
“I did,” Erwin replies, indulgent. Their foreplay isn’t limited to touches alone and they both need verbal contact. Something out loud, filling the space between and around them so they can affirm that this relationship isn’t going to vanish in gold dust and rotting flesh.
“I can’t imagine that,” Levi says, sinking his body down to lie flat against Erwin. Erwin feels his entire body respond and he hums his reply, unable to form words as Levi grinds against him.
“We have time,” Erwin manages, eventually, with flushed cheeks and pleasure shivers. “I’ll tell you everything.”
If Erwin was the marrying sort, he reckoned he could marry Levi. Not yet, he’s hardly a fan of quick matched weddings and has a job to fulfil anyway, but one day, if they survive, perhaps he’ll swap Levi’s keys for a ring.
The keys around Levi’s neck clank as he removes his underwear. He mutters something and sets to work on removing Erwin’s remaining clothes, wrinkling his nose when he reaches Erwin’s feet.
“How many fucking holes does a sock need to have before you throw it away?” Erwin’s chest deflates a little and he frowns. His salary hardly allows for splurges and one or two (or three) holes isn’t too bad.
“You’re killing my boner,” Levi says with distaste, pulling Erwin’s socks off and letting them hang from his hands. At least they are clean, Erwin thinks, and his frown deepens.
Levi drops the socks and Erwin has barely a second before Levi is kissing him, socks discarded and forgotten, along with the rest of their clothing.
“Our budget doesn’t allow for frivolous spending,” Erwin defends and Levi pulls back from kissing Erwin’s neck, eyes wide and curious.
“Then we’ll rearrange the budget,” he says simply, returning to Erwin’s neck, pressing hot, wet kisses against skin. “I’ll make sure you get the sturdiest socks this side of the walls.”
Erwin wants to point out that titans hardly sit down and make clothes when Levi bites his neck, just at the base. Erwin hisses, hand rising automatically, and lets his head roll back as Levi soothes the area with his tongue. Erwin can feel the smirk and he raises his head a little, enough so that he can watch Levi as he moves down.
His mouth latches gently to Erwin’s nipple and Levi gives an experimental suck. His tongue flicks against the nub and Erwin moans, his head hitting the bed with a dull thud.
“You’re pretty sensitive here,” Levi says and he runs a thumb across Erwin’s nipple. The skin is hardened and Erwin looks up through strands of hair that have loosened from their usual position. Levi is ruining him, undoing him piece by piece from the composed leader the light of day portrays him.
“Do you think you’d come just from me playing with your nipples?” Levi asks, voice contemplating. Erwin shivers at the thought and the muscles in his leg twitch, garnering an eyebrow raise from Levi.
“But don’t think it’ll be the only time I’m letting you come,” Levi says and Erwin’s eyes widen.
True to his word, Levi shifts his weight off of Erwin and lies on one side. He’s able to lavish attention to Erwin’s left nipple alone and does it wonderfully. Erwin’s arm curls behind him, stroking Levi’s shoulders as he feels pleasure building.
Levi is skilful in how he works. He is tentative and delicate, using his teeth sparingly and only to graze, a simple hint of pain. They know true pain and Levi’s tongue sooths away the slight discomfort instantly, excitement boiling in Erwin’s blood.
Turning his attention to the other nipple, Levi rolls over. Erwin makes a move to touch him, but he pulls back instantly, hands pulling back to rest on Erwin’s thighs.
“You don’t get to touch yet,” Levi hisses, digging his fingers into Erwin’s thigh and Erwin murmurs his response, fixed on the controlled anger in Levi’s eyes and the pressure of Levi’s dick against his.
He is powerless to Levi and his muscles tense, holding him rigid. Erwin knows that if he relaxes, he will move and moving isn’t what Levi wants him to do. Levi has control for now and Erwin hardly gets a raw end of the deal. He takes a sharp inhale of breath as Levi runs his tongue across his chest, kissing his way over Erwin’s right nipple.
Contrary to his earlier words, Levi doesn’t make Erwin come from this alone. He pulls back, wiping his mouth, before kissing Erwin eagerly. Erwin moves a hand against Levi’s back, rolling his hips as they kiss, revelling in the small pants Levi makes against his lips. They do not need to fight for dominance or hold it over one another – they know what they want and they will always push and pull at each other.
Erwin feels Levi take control and lets him. He shifts his hips, pressing down harder against Erwin, catching his lip between his teeth. Levi’s eyes are shut tight and Erwin thinks that if one image had to be burnt into his eyelids for the rest of his life then this image wouldn’t be such a bad one. Levi looks free, glorious and open, and Erwin jerks forward slightly, coming without warning.
“Erwin,” Levi moans, a little annoyance in his tone, and Erwin pulls his control back a little enough to reach for Levi’s cock and hold it in his palm. He keeps it still as Levi fucks into it and smiles as Levi comes, back arching and hands reaching behind to grasp Erwin’s thighs.
“Stamina,” Levi says as he pulls his head forward, releasing his grip on Erwin’s legs and sliding off him. He moves to get tissue and Erwin remains still as Levi wipes both his stomach and hand gently, throwing the tissue to the floor and kissing Erwin gently. “I know it’s been a while, but we need to work on stamina.”
Erwin smiles indulgently, pulling Levi tight to his side.
“I think that’s something we can work on easily,” he says, thumb trailing against the keys Levi is still wearing.
“Your scrawny teenage years then,” Levi says. “Tell me about them”
“They’re not that interesting,” Erwin says, but in truth he does want to tell Levi. Levi will know him inside and out before they die, Erwin has promised to himself, but he cannot push everything when they are still so new.
“Careful, I’ll find someone younger if you’re going to be this boring all the time.” Levi jabs his fingers into Erwin’s rib and Erwin shies away, the spot ticklish.
“Stop it,” Erwin snaps, though there’s no malice in his tone and Levi does pull back, resting his fingertips on the muscles of Erwin’s stomach instead. His hand looks small and alone so Erwin places his spare hand with Levi’s, fingers threading together.
“I didn’t have many friends,” he begins and while he cannot see Levi’s face, he knows he is paying close attention. “I was a weird kid,” Erwin offers and thinks he hears Levi mutter than he still is creepy, but he ignores that.
“I went through training with Mike and Nile – the commander of the military police. Nile and I aren’t particularly on good terms anymore, but he’s a good man deep down. Mike’s… well he’s Mike. I trust him.” Trust was a heavy word and Levi nods slowly. Erwin wonders if there’s anyone Levi trusts outside of this room, but that’s a question for another time.
“Why did you join the scouting legion?” Levi says, voice flat and emotionless. It’s isn’t an empty question and Erwin shifts until he’s on his side, propped up on the arm that had been holding Levi and looking him in the eye.
“This world is corrupt,” he says, heart pounding. He’s told people variations of what he’s to tell Levi, but never the full truth. “It’s not just the titans I want to put an end to, but to the filth that inhabits our walls and our governments.”
Levi looks at him, searching his face for something before he lets out a breath, relaxing.
“The pigs will never know what’s coming, will they?” Levi looks at him, tilting his head up for a kiss. “They made a mistake when they made you commander of an entire army.”
Perhaps they did, Erwin thinks, but they’ll never know that until it’s too late.
*
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[Erwin/Levi] Cedarwood 14b/? (Anonymous) - 2014-02-27 02:21 (UTC) - Expand
Re: [Erwin/Levi] Cedarwood 14b/? (Anonymous) - 2014-02-28 03:32 (UTC) - Expand
[Erwin/Levi] Cedarwood 15/?
(Anonymous)
2014-03-08 02:57 am (UTC)(link)
The second part of this contains a surgical experiment scene. While not long it is slightly graphic so please don't read if you don't want to or can't. What they discovered will be discussed in the next part. (also mentions - very very very brief - of child abuse and kidnapping/character death of an OC).
*
The base they were moving to is set outside a small village. They welcome the scouting legion happily, knowing that their income is about to take a boost, and Erwin dismounts, settling his horse with the inn owner.
“You must have come through early this morning,” the village leader, a stocky woman who runs the village with a firm, but kind hand. She’s turned soldiers out of her village before, even after warning the previous commander of her zero-harassment tolerance. This is the first time Erwin’s led the legion and been through these parts, but she’s always been decent to him and is not the least surprised to see him wearing the role of commander.
“I didn’t wish to disturb,” Erwin replies, asking for water rather than ale. The innkeeper nods and also places down a sparse lunch – bread, cheese and some meats – and Erwin thanks him.
“We’ve just taken on some new recruits,” Erwin says, sipping his water and picking at his plate. “And I shall be absent tonight so I just wanted to give you permission to take any unruly recruits and keep hem locked up until I return.”
Discipline is what every soldier needs and Erwin’s a little worried that the soldiers they’ve taken on are too relaxed. None of them understand what a titan really is, let along comprehend fighting against one. Yes they’ve undergone the training and been through the motions, but that’s just superficial. They’re untried and untested and if they believe the scouting legion is anything less than ruthless then they’ll be in for a shock.
Erwin slips some of the meat to Ardis and she chews on it thankfully. She doesn’t need it, but she enjoys it all the same. A huge short of air waves over them and Erwin smiles at the huge musk ox dominating the inn. He’s the village leader’s daemon and the inn keeper has had to clear out the area for them while they talk.
“Is there anything else I should know?” she says, turning her back on the bar an resting on it.
Erwin looks at her, noting the deeper lines on her face and her stiff stance. So it has been a harsh few months even this far out, he thinks. Ardis looks at him and bows her head.
“We’ve brought our own provisions,” Erwin says, because it’s standard. They always bring their own provisions, though they’ve been less strict in the past and accepted donations from villages. No one can afford to anymore, Erwin thinks.
Money and food have always been tight behind the walls – for anyone other than the elite that is. People aren’t starving in their homes (not enough that the government has to take action anyway), but across the poorer areas, people are starving. Their latest crop yield has failed to provide a boost and many people will be suffering.
“I’ll make sure my soldiers enter the town with their wallets,” Erwin says, brushing crumbs from his hands and downing his water. He dismisses himself and takes his horse, not bothering to mount just yet.
Instead, he walks with Ardis, letting his horse plod beside them. She’s a docile one and nudges Erwin gently as he takes his hands from the reins and lets her walk freely. She doesn’t stray.
It’s time Erwin says to Ardis. She gives a short whine, ears pressed down in discomfort. Neither of them like the idea of torture and the thought of seeing a child abuser makes Erwin’s stomach turn.
It will be valuable, Ardis affirms, though her ears are still flat and she stands rigid as Erwin mounts.
They ride slowly; there is no rush. Mike is watching their soldiers and Erwin gave his excuses (Mike knows though no words have been shared between them – Erwin thinks perhaps he smelt it on him). They have the night and Erwin’s mind whirls with the possibilities they might be able to find.
When the farmhouse appears in the distance, Erwin spares no second thought and asks his horse for a swift canter. His heart is pounding and steely; they have no time now to lose.
*
Hange, Levi is quick to learn, could have been the queen to his king if she’d lived in the underworld. She is ruthless and cunning, yet unabashed. She doesn’t wrinkle her nose as they step down into the sewers and even reaches out for a rat, asking Levi if he’s ever eaten one.
“Once or twice,” Levi admits, staring ahead of them to where the rat is sitting. It blinks at them then runs off, Hange sighing.
“I’ve had a squirrel,” she says, following Levi as they move through the sewer network. It’s the only way to get to where they want to go, despite Levi’s hatred of the sewers. They’re disgusting and full of disease.
When they near their location, Hange falls silent. She, like Levi, has manoeuvre gear strapped to her sides and Levi’s hands fall to his blades. Kiva is at his side, locating the tunnel they need in the darkness. When she runs forward, Levi follows, letting his hands slip from the blades and climbing up the ladder.
They don’t bother to close the hatch they climb through. Hange pats her daemon’s head from where Asha sits, in her jacket pocket, and they look around the warehouse they’ve found themselves in.
Technically they’ve entered through the back entrance – the escape route. There is a larger entrance, but this one gives them a little more surprise. The sound of water generators for the sewage system has covered up any noise they might have made and Levi knows exactly where he’s going. He’s been here before, when he was younger, when he was asked to join.
“Anyone will do,” Levi says, and Hange nods, smiling slightly. Levi wonders if she’s ever done this and was about to ask when someone crosses their view.
The warehouse is full of machinery parts and stacked up boxes. It’s the ideal location for them and they duck behind a large stack of metal rods. The person in view is a man, old and with a slight hunch to his back. He’s dressed nicely and Levi licks his lips, letting Kiva sneak a little closer.
His daemon’s a Komodo dragon, she says and Levi nods to Hange. If his daemon had been too large they’d have to look for someone else. They’re lucky and Levi wastes no time.
Hange moves first, stepping into the open. The man starts, hands darting to his side. He freezes when his eyes catch Hange’s blade boxes and Levi can practically hear his knees shake.
“We’re here to collect you,” Hange says and Levi can picture the smile on her face. He sends Kiva off to keep an eye on the daemon while he moves into a better position. They’re to subdue the daemon first and use it as negotiation.
It’s hard. Hange engages the man and they’re lucky he’s fairly complacent. He doesn’t reach for his gun – perhaps he’s waiting till Hange steps closer into better range – and Kiva gets the attention of the Komodo dragon. Its forked tongue passes through air and it picks her scent up, oblivious to Levi until he’s wrapped his wires around her jaw, careful not to touch her skin. They may be kidnapping this man, but there is still something sacred about touching another’s daemon.
“Ira!” the man gasps as he notices Levi’s work. She is strong and struggles, but she falls completely still, a sign Levi takes as Hange moving closer with her blades.
Levi stands
“You’re coming with us,” Levi orders and the man’s head snaps to him, hovered over his daemon. “You’ll be watched by Hange and I’ll watch your daemon. If either of you make a move to escape, I’ll kill you.”
The words are strong and Levi tilts his head back, slipping more wire from the coil he’d attached to his gear. He’ll have to keep her on a line, degrading her.
“Do you understand?” Hange asks and the man nods. The higher ups here work through others – they’ll exploit the children who they kidnap and take the money, but they never get their own hands dirty. Levi doesn’t think that this man’s ever actually fired his own gun.
“Y-y-y-“ the man mumbles and his daemon hangs its head pathetically. Levi smells something he’s not sure is the sewer. The man’s probably pissed himself.
“Let’s go,” Levi mutters, leading the way. He’s merciless and watches the man’s daemon fall the small distance to the tunnel system below them. Hange almost lets the man follow too, but allows him to lower himself down with hands and feet.
From there it’s a smooth journey, through Sina and to the abandoned farmhouse. The nearest village is a small one and no one pays them any mind as they stop to pick up some basic provisions.
Their hostage is silent as Levi keeps him company and Kiva curls around his neck in annoyance. They’ve both been looking for a fight and this man has provided them with nothing. Levi hopes that whatever Erwin wants to see from this experiment will be there.
The farmhouse is empty, as expected. Hange unloads their gear from the carriage as Levi gets their ‘guest’ settled. He’s compliant and probably knows that this is the end.
He deserves it, Levi hisses to Kiva and she tucks her head against his neck. They hate the filth the underground dregs up and Levi thinks of all the people this man has killed – directly or indirectly.
He’ll be useful for once, Kiva murmurs and Levi nods, tying the man to a wooden chair.
There is a brass pot on the table, an odd object compared to the tools Hange’s begun setting out. Small wooden sticks fill the pot and Levi wonders their exact use.
“You’re unusually complacent,” Levi comments, turning to face the hostage. His head is hung low and his daemon twitches on the ground, trying to free its mouth.
“I’ve been through worse,” the man bluffs and Levi rolls his eyes. Perhaps he thinks he’ll get away if he plays it cool. He has no idea that his capture was a one-way deal, not a negotiation.
The door opens and Levi turns, two sets of footsteps present. He nods at Erwin and narrows his eyes at the lack of Ardis.
“If Kiva could leave to sit with Ardis and Asha,” Erwin commands and Levi lets his daemon go, eyes narrowing. Erwin doesn’t answer him directly and directs Hange to her medical supplies and the drugs she’ll use to numb the pain. They need to keep their hostage alive and pain-free through the experiment, after all.
“We’re going to numb your entire body,” Erwin says, working over the brass pot. “You won’t be able to move and you won’t be able to feel anything.”
The man opens his mouth, wriggling in fear as Hange approaches. Levi doesn’t know what’s in the needle Hange’s holding and doesn’t want to. She’s worked as a field doctor for the scouting legion many times and Levi vows never to get hurt so badly he needs her medical attention. Kiva echoes the agreement from outside the room, tucked up with Asha and Ardis, unhappy yet unable to do anything.
The smell of smoke passes through the room and Levi watches as Erwin hovers over the pot a little more before stepping back. The scent changes and Levi recognises the thin layer of rosemary and jasmine, a woody undertone cutting through.
So this was why Erwin asked for their daemons to remain outside, Levi thinks. And the cedarwood is how they’ll stop the man’s daemon from attacking them as they work on his brain.
The man slumps forward suddenly and Hange smiles, motioning to Levi.
“You’re going to help me,” she says, offering up shaving tools. They work quickly to shave the man’s head, Erwin moving to stand in front of the man. His daemon is slumped beside him, on its side and breathing rapidly. As long as they have the burner running, they’ll be fine.
“Let’s get started then,” Hange announces, waiting for Erwin’s nod before she makes the first cut.
They work together to pass through skin and bone. Levi wonders how the man is able to stay alive, but Erwin’s keeping a close eye on him and reports that he is fine. His breathing has increased, but he cannot feel what’s going on and so cannot quite understand.
Finding what they want is a little difficult. With titans, Hange explains, they can hack away at the brain and the titan will be fine. With humans, a cut to the brain means certain death. They work awkwardly and the few looks Levi shoots at Erwin show him with a clenched jaw and darkened eyes. So Levi works harder, letting Hange guide him.
Levi finds his hands covered in gore and his palms supporting something when Hange makes a deep sound in her throat. It’s a noise of disappointment and she steps back, wiping her hands on her gown.
“This is where it would be,” she directs to Erwin. The thick smell of blood rushes over Levi and he curls his nose. “But it’s not.”
He takes the cue and releases whatever he was holding. This whole thing was useless, he can tell, and his stomach fills with the disappointment that passes fleetingly over Erwin’s face.
“We needed to know,” Erwin says and Hange moves back to her collection of needles. She’s already explained that she’ll use an injection to kill the man and she does just that.
His daemon vanishes in a million sparkling particles and Levi hovers, covered in the blood of a dead man. He wants to know what they didn’t find and why it’s so important, but he knows if he opens his mouth, the taste of human decay will silence him.
“Let’s get this cleaned,” Erwin says instead, slipping on a gown of his own and reaching for the gloves. “And then we’ll talk about what this all means.”
*
Tbc.
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