Of course at the time, I’d been stupid enough to think that our night together meant we were going to start dating. When she realized I was only a freshman, she’d laughed and patted my chest. She told me I was fun, but in no way dating material. That’d stung, but when I realized it was better that I didn’t get attached to anyone, I knew she’d actually done me a favor. She’d woken me from a long and tortuous depression and showed mI could actually be happy again. Well, if not truly happy, at least distracted from the aching sadness.
I spent every weekend after chasing after girls. It wasn’t hard. I’d grown to well over six feet by then and looked much older than fifteen. I never really examined my actions too closely. And now I’ve been doing it for so long, it’s just part of my survival instincts. Sex was the only closeness I got, and I couldn’t give that up. And I couldn’t risk love when it had the probability of ending so badly.
Chapter 11
After turning in the Russian assassin assignment to McAllister, I receive my next assignment.
Wil-tech has been contracted by the descendants of a royal family in Lithuania. Their once-trusted financial advisor Lars stole priceless artifacts and jewels from their bank vault and disappeared. He’s now surfaced in Germany, trying to sell the stolen goods. My job is to figure out who his buyers are and where they plan to meet. McAllister says once we know the rendezvous point, he’ll send Colt and a few members of the team in to take him down, stolen goods in possession.
I’ve worked for hours trying to break into the network he’s using, but it’s no use. They have some type of firewall that I might be able to infiltrate only if I was operating under the same network, but that’s not going to happen. He’s in Germany. I’m in Connecticut. I even used MJ’s translation skills, but it didn’t help.
I may have to break the news to McAllister that this one is beyond me, but I want one last go at it in Independent Study today.
When I walk into the computer lab, McAllister is waiting for me. Colt is with him. They’re talking in low voices and stop abruptly when I enter the room.
I sit down in the chair across from them. I assume McAllister is here to give me my next assignment, but Colt’s presence confuses me.
Once I’m seated, McAllister pulls a black envelope from his jacket pocket, but he makes no move to hand it to me. “I trust you know Colt?”
My eyes flick to Colt’s. He’s watching me too. I can tell by his flushed cheeks and by the pulse jumping in his neck that they’ve been arguing about something. I don’t think I’d have the guts to argue with McAllister about any subject. It makes me even more curious about why he’s here.
McAllister clears his throat and hands Colt the envelope, but looks over toward me. “The two of you will team up on this assignment.” While that’s still sinking in, McAllister turns to me. “This case hasn’t gone as expected, so you’ll be getting field experience earlier than anticipated.”
I’m not sure how I feel about this news. This is all still so surreal.
“But I’m sure you know you’re our only computer programmer here,” McAllister continues.
I nod.
Colt is quiet.
“You leave in the morning.”
“Leave?” I question.
“I’ve received a tip from an informant and Lars is in Cleveland for the weekend. You’ll be traveling there for the job. Shouldn’t take more than a day or two.”
Huh. Me and Colt? Alone. In Cleveland. Well this is an interesting development.
A moment later Colt stands. “Meet me at nine out front.” Without waiting for me to respond, he leaves.
I break the news to MJ and Logan that I leave in the morning. They’re shocked that I’m already assigned field work. But MJ helps me pack.
MJ holds up a pair of my jeans and makes a face, tossing them aside.
I snatch my jeans back. “These are my comfy jeans.”
“Oh yes, and comfort is the key spending a couple of nights on the road with the hottest instructor in school.” She smirks. “These are cuter.” She thrusts a pair of skintight black jeans inside my bag.
What am I getting myself into?
In the morning, I head downstairs, backpack slung over one shoulder and step outside into the circle drive in front of the school. Colt’s leaning against a sleek, black BMW that gleams in the sunlight. He looks smug and perfectly unkempt in a wrinkled button down shirt and jeans.
As I head toward him, he doesn’t even try to conceal that fact that he’s checking me out. I keep my chin high and pretend not to notice that he’s visually molesting me. You can look all you want, buddy, but you’re not getting any of this.
I walk past him, and open up the back door, tossing my backpack inside, then set my laptop bag on the seat beside it.
He opens the car door for me. But before getting in, I turn and face him. “We need to get something straight.”
He raises an eyebrow.
“This will be strictly a business arrangement. Understand?”
His lips slip into a smile. “Obviously. What did you think it was?”
Oh, right. I sound like a complete jackass. “Nothing, never mind. Let’s go.” I slip on my sunglasses and slide into the car. The interior is sleek and black, trimmed in shiny silver. Classy. As I pull my door closed, I notice it smells good in here. Like cologne. Well that’s distracting.
Colt gets inside, and tosses the black assignment envelope on my lap.
It’s been torn open along the flap and I slip the single sheet of paper from inside as Colt pulls out, kicking up gravel in his wake.
I read over the assignment while Colt turns on the music.
His phone is buzzing as soon as we start moving. He answers it as he maneuvers us down the single-lane drive toward the main road.
“Yeah?” he answers.
I can tell it’s a girl’s voice coming through the speaker, but I can’t make out what she’s saying.
“Listen, Bria, we already talked about this.”
He listens to her for a few seconds more, then cuts in again. “I know, and it was fun. But I was clear about what I wanted from the beginning.”
He listens to her carry on for a few moments; her voice raised just enough for me to detect the anger in her tone. I cringe into my seat. I know how bad it sucks being dumped.
“Look, I’m sorry you’re upset, but there’s nothing more to talk about. I’ve gotta go.” He clicks the phone off.
Damn, that was harsh. I shake my head. “Nice, Colt.”
He straightens in his seat. “I’m sorry you had to hear that.”
I wave my hand. “No biggie. I’ve been briefed on how you roll.”
“How I roll?” He pulls out onto the highway, picking up speed.
“You know, with the ladies?”
His mouth tugs down in the corners.
“Look, I’m not judging. It’s your life. You don’t have to explain it to me.”
He’s quiet for a second, and he focuses on the road. “If we’re going to work together, I don’t want you thinking I’m a douche bag.”
Too late. “Don’t worry about it.” I wave him off. I turn and look out my window, watching the pine trees pass by in a blur. For some reason, my mind wanders to Wes.
We dated for five months earlier this year. One night, with his parents out of town, he’d made a bed of blankets in front of the fireplace. It was the first, and last time we slept together.
He was distant the next day when we talked on the phone, and then didn’t answer my calls or texts for the next two days. I found out online that he’d be snowboarding with his friends that Sunday, and I drove down to the ski hill and waited in the lodge all afternoon. I had to know what was going on. I finally met up with him in the parking lot. He and his friends were sweaty and laughing as they made their way to his truck. His face dropped when he saw me.
He said he didn’t want to be tied down, and things had been getting too serious between us. Serious? No shit. Three days before, he told me he loved me and took my virginity. When I reminded him of that, he just said he didn’t want a serious girlfriend right now. His friends stood beside his truck, loading their boards inside while he broke up with me.
I didn’t even wait for him to finish, I turned and walked calmly to my car. I needed to get away from him before I broke down. I went straight home and spent the afternoon hacking into his personal files, social networks and email, intent on making his life a living hell, all the while tears streaming down my cheeks.
Colt keeps the music playing low, one hand on the wheel, his face relaxed. I watch him drive from the corner of my eye. His shirt sleeves are rolled up, his arms are tone and tan, and wound around one wrist is a woven bracelet made up of individual thin strings of leather.
And after a little while, I’m feeling bold. “So what’s with the bracelet?” I make a point of looking at the strings on his wrist.
He glances down at it, his brow drawing together.
I wonder if it’s from one of his many admirers, and what memory it’s conjured up.
“It was my mother’s,” he says, surprising me.
Oh.
“She wore it as an ankle bracelet.” He smiles. “And I did too, when she first gave it to me, until I got too big and it didn’t fit. Then I moved it to my wrist.”
Colt turns up the music and I know the conversation is over, but I’m left wondering if there’s more to the story.
Chapter 12
It’d been five years since I lost my mother, but the ache was still there like a pulled muscle, flaring up when you thought you were recovered. I don’t know why I’d admitted that stuff about my mom to Taylor. I needed to hold shit together, keep my head in the game. I was here for an assignment, not to reminisce about my mother and certainly not to examine my feelings for some girl who thought she had me all figured out. I know what Taylor thinks of me, and that’s fine. It’ll be easier to stay away from her if she stays away from me too.
We make it six hours of the nine hour trip when a tire blows out, sending the car screeching across the highway. I swear under my breath and slow to a stop on the shoulder. “Wait here,” I tell Taylor while I get out to inspect the damage.
She waits inside, watching me in the side mirror.
I kick at the flattened rear tire. Great. Just great.
I glance at Taylor. Despite what I told her, she’s unlatching her seat belt and getting out.
She stands next to me in silence watching while I jack up the car and bolt on the flimsy spare from the trunk.
“What are we going to do now?” she asks, once we’re back in the car.
“We won’t be able to go above forty-five on this tire, so we’ll need to pull off at the first repair shop we find.”
We ride in silence for a few miles, the music off, the hum of the roadway louder under the inadequate tire, until after about fifteen minutes, the GPS directs me to a repair shop just off the highway.
Taylor waits while I go inside. The place is run down, poorly managed and lacking in the tire I need. Fuck. I slam my fist against the counter.
After arguing for several minutes with the guy at the counter, I storm outside. Taylor is out of the car and on her feet.
“What are you doing?” she scolds. “That poor kid at the counter is practically shaking.”
I stomp out past her into the parking lot, but can feel her hot on my trail.
“Why are you in such a piss-poor mood?” She jogs to catch up with me. “So we got a flat? Big deal. We’ll get a new tire and we’ll be back on the road shortly.”
“You mean tomorrow?”
“Tomorrow?” she questions.
“They don’t have the tire we need, and with the shop closing for the night, we won’t be able to get one until the morning.” I keep walking.
Taylor catches up and tugs on my sleeve. “There’s a pizza place across the street. Come on. Let’s go get something to eat. We’ll figure out what to do.”
I glance at her, those big blue eyes are fixed on mine and the pissed off feeling subsides slightly. I give her a tight nod, and follow.
For the next fifteen minutes, I mess around on my phone trying to find the tire I need in stock somewhere else and glance up occasionally to watch Taylor nibbling on a slice of pizza.
She’s certainly not shy about eating. I told her to order whatever she wanted, and while most girls would get a side salad, and some water, she took that literal. Three large slices of pizza piled with spicy sausage and onions. A smile escapes my lips when she catches me watching her eat. But then I go back to my phone.
“Have one.” She slides the tray toward me.
I glance up again briefly, making eye contact. “I’m good.” I search every car place within fifty miles, but I still can’t get the tire delivered to the repair shop faster than tomorrow. So I quit searching for a tire, and instead start looking for a hotel. “Are you about done? I found a place for us to stay tonight.”
Taylor swallows down the last bite of pizza, wiping her mouth across the napkin. “Give me that.” She rips the phone from my hands, shaking her head. She begins tapping at the keys, that little crease appearing between her brows. “There’s nothing more irritating than incompetence,” she mutters under her breath.
I lean back against the booth, knowing she won’t be able to miraculously find something if I couldn’t. But her cockiness is cute. Nice try, sweetheart.
“This freaking Podunk town,” she murmurs next.
I suppress a smile and fold my hands behind my head. “No luck?”
She shoots me a glare that screams fuck off. God she’s adorable when she’s pissed. I bite my lip to keep from smiling. “Are you through? I found us a hotel for the night.”
She squints her eyes at me, her mouth pressing into a line. “Fine.” She slides the phone back across the table toward me.
“Let’s go. The shop probably has our loner ready.”
I slap a twenty down on the table and lead Taylor to the door.
Chapter 13
At the auto shop there’s a newer model silver sedan waiting for us with the keys already in it, so they don’t have to deal with Colt again, I presume.
We check into a hotel on the nicer side of town. Colt uses his corporate credit card to get us a two-bedroom suite on the hotel’s top floor. When we step into the room, I take a moment to look around. There’s floor to ceiling windows in the living room and the furniture is all pale blues and creams. It’s nice.
I turn to Colt, but it’s obvious his shitty mood is still firmly in place. He slams his duffle bag down onto an arm chair, swearing under his breath.
I roll my eyes and take a deep breath. I don't understand why he’s so worked up. Everything will turn out fine with his precious car. I get that things didn’t go as planned, but we’ll be back on the road tomorrow. Maybe he needs to blow off some steam. Guys like him can’t go from being all revved up to completely cooled down so quickly. An idea takes shape in my mind. “Come on, we’re going out.”
He searches my eyes. “What are you talking about? We just got here.” His voice has a sharp edge to it.
I turn my back, walking toward the door. “We need to get you laid.”
He inhales sharply. “Huh?”
I face him again, my hand still on the door knob. “This is just like Piper’s little brother, he’s crabby when he’s hungry. You’re being crabby right now. Therefore, we need to satisfy your… appetite. ” I pull open the door and though he hesitates for just a moment, I can tell he’ll come.
Despite acting like he was against my idea, Colt grins as we step into the elevator. We ride to the ground floor in silence.
Once we reach the hotel lobby Colt hands his ticket to the valet and a moment later, we step outside as the silver sedan pulls to a stop in front of us. Before Colt has a chance to open my door, I lunge for it and hop inside. I don’t need myself getting even more confused about our arrangement. We’re coworkers. That’s it. I desperately need to cling to that perspective. He shakes his head, chuckling under his breath and walks around to his side of the car.
A few minutes later, Colt parks on the street in front of a bar called Whiskey Dicks. I glance up at the sign, then back at him. Seriously?
“Remember this was your idea. I’m just going along with it.” He opens his door and unfolds his tall frame from the confines of the car.
I follow him up to the door where a bouncer is checking IDs. I hesitate. “Colt…” I turn to him and whisper.
“Hush.” He puts his hand on the small of my back, and propels me toward the door. He skillfully slips the bouncer a twenty, and the doors are pulled open for us.
Oh.
Once inside, the smell of beer and cheap perfume overwhelm me. I stay close to Colt’s side. He walks toward the back of the bar, ignoring the stares being directed our way. He acts like he’s been here a thousand times before and settles at a semi-secluded high top table in the corner.
Once we’re seated, I have the chance to really look around. The place is pretty small, one long bar running the length of the room, with a few scattered tables and a mess of stools. The crowd here is young, well, not our age young, but appropriate bar-age young. A cluster of guys mill around a pool table near us, a few girls sway to the too-loud music on the dance floor on the far side of the room. And people everywhere stand around talking, sipping drinks, and laughing out loud.
Colt’s eyes are roaming, just like mine, but for a different reason. Once he spots the waitress, he waves her over. She saunters up to our table, her eyes full of lust for Colt. “What can I getcha?”
Colt turns to me. Reluctantly, the waitress’ eyes follow. Now they are both looking at me. My mind goes completely blank. I’ve never been to a bar and ordered for myself before. Beer? Wine? Liquor? But what kind? I was about to ask for a water when Colt comes to my rescue.
“We’ll both take a vodka tonic. Belvedere if you have it.”
She nods once and turns on her heel.
“Thanks,” I mumble once she’s gone.
Colt nods, his eyes scanning the crowd. I watch him scope out the girls, wondering which is his type. The waitress returns with our drinks, and I test a sip. It’s bitter and stiff. I choke down it down, wondering how people actually enjoy this. Colt removes the straw from his glass, and takes a gulp, draining half its contents.
I force down another swig, then slide the drink away from me. “So anyone catching your eye?”
Colt looks up, like I’ve interrupted some private thought. “Are we seriously doing this?” his voice hints at boredom.
“What about her?” I nod toward the bleach blonde swaying her hips alone on the center of the dance floor. She’s in skin tight jeans torn at the knees and a hot pink halter top. Just trashy enough for a one night stand with being overtly skanky. A perfect choice for him.
He pulls his eyebrows together and shakes his head.
“What’s wrong with her?”
He glares at me. It’s strange how expressive he is without speaking a single word. He takes another drink, draining the rest of his glass. “We are not picking out my next victim together.” He offers a sly smile. Oh, this boy is trouble. With a capital T.
I stir the ice cubes in mine with the straw. “So who’s your choice?”
His eyes fix on mine and stay there for what feels like too long.
I roll my eyes. “Colt, I’m serious, this is why we’re here. We need to get you out of your shitty mood, and I’ve been around you long enough to know this is how it’s done.”
He finally drops his eyes from mine, and looks around. “Fine.” He takes a deep breath and releases it slowly. I watch him scan the room. “Her.” He nods toward the bar.
I turn around to glance in that direction, trying not to be too obvious. The girl he’s looking at is a brunette with pretty, yet plain looks, jeans, sandals and a long sleeved T-shirt. She certainly doesn’t stand out amongst the overly made-up girls trying hard to get noticed. This girl is actively trying not to be noticed if you ask me. Very little make up, hair back in a low ponytail, nothing spectacular about her. She actually reminds me a lot of, well…me.
I reach for my drink and take another sip, fumbling with the straw. I don’t know what Colt sees in her, most guys probably wouldn’t give her a second glance, not with the busty blondes putting on a show on the dance floor.
“Her?” I double check, thinking I must have the wrong girl.
His eyes are back on me. He nods.
“Why her?” I take another sip. It’s not as bad once you get used to the taste. He takes the drink from my hand, his fingers brushing past mine.
“Not too much, little one.” He sets the drink down across the table from me.
I squint my eyes, glaring at him.
“She’s the only one in here, besides you, who looks like a nice, normal girl. No drama. No strange ulterior motives.”
I half expect him to add disease-free. I don’t know what to make of his comment, but suddenly I’m wishing I had my drink back to distract me. After a few moments, I recover. “So go talk to her.”
Colt looks bored. “You’re serious about this whole thing, aren’t you?”
“Uh, yeah. Obviously. Now go.” I shoo him from the table.
Colt shakes his head, but he’s grinning. He gets off his stool, looking in her direction.
I reach out for his arm, and feign a voice of concern. “You have protection, right son?”
He rolls his eyes and walks away. Of course he does. He’s probably wearing a condom at all times, just in case. “Have fun!” I call to him, playfully and watch his backside for a few moments. Unfortunately he turns and looks back and catches me looking. He chuckles and I can’t help but blush, knowing I was just caught checking out his behind.
It takes everything in me not to turn and watch him try to pick her up. I wonder what it would be like to have Colt’s attention like that.
After a few minutes, I sneak a glance but Colt and the mystery brunette are gone. WTF? Damn, he works fast. I scan the bar, looking around for them. Surely he wouldn’t just leave me here. Would he? I guess I really hadn’t thought this through.
A second later, a guy with shaggy blonde hair and crystal blue eyes is standing in front of me. “Hi.”
“Hi?” I say, more than a little confused.
“I’m Ted.”
“Taylor.” I raise up on my stool and glance around him, still searching for Colt. But the mess of bodies crowding the bar makes it impossible.
“It looks like your friend left with my friend, so I thought I’d keep you company,” Ted says, bringing my attention back to him.
So Colt did leave with her. Huh. I try not to be annoyed and remind myself that this was my idea. I wonder if she’s in our car right now, sitting where I just sat, on her way to the hotel room I’m sharing with him. The vodka churns in my stomach. Ted sits down in the stool across from me. Colt’s stool. It feels like even more of an invasion.
“I’ve never seen you here before,” he says, flipping his longish hair off his forehead.
“Never been here before.” I down the rest of the drink. Probably not wise, but I’ll do anything to defy Colt right now. Ted’s cute actually, but I’m so on edge about Colt’s fling with the plain brunette who I swear could pass as my sister, I can’t focus on anything around me.
We pass about fifteen minutes with Ted trying to engage me in a conversation (he goes to school at the nearby university) but my mind twirls with thoughts of Colt and what he might be doing at this very moment, not to mention worrying about how I’m going to get back to the hotel.
A few minutes later, Colt appears with the brunette smiling by his side. Another satisfied customer. They stroll up to the table together. He introduces her as Sarah. Awesome. Colt drops a few bills on the table to pay our tab and we say goodbye to Sarah and Ted. She and Colt don’t even exchange phone numbers, not even a thank you. Huh. I guess that’s how it’s done. Though it certainly isn’t something I’m used to.
Outside I storm ahead of Colt, heading straight for the car.
“Hey, what’s wrong?” he calls from behind me.
I hold up my hand, waving him off and keep walking. If I tell him what’s wrong, it won’t be pretty. I have no clue why I’m so emotional, why this whole thing is conjuring up memories of Wes I can’t deal with.
“Why are you pissed at me? This was your idea.”
I swing around to face him. “Yeah, well I didn’t think you’d leave me alone in a bar while you fucked some random girl in the parking lot.”
A group of guys getting out of their car next to us bursts into laughter. I walk away from Colt as their laughter grates against my nerves.
“We didn’t fuck, actually,” Colt’s voice is low. He stands inches from me, looking frustrated.
Anger and jealousy pulses through me and I force air into my lungs, trying to push the irrational feelings away. I take a moment to gather my wits and notice that Colt’s hair seems no more rumpled than before. His shirt is still neatly buttoned.
“I just let her go down on me.” He grins a cocky half smile and glances at me through his eyelashes.
I push past him, walking ahead.
He chuckles and quickens his stride to catch up with me. “God, I’m kidding, Taylor, calm down. She went out for a smoke and I kept her company. We just talked. You’d like her actually, she’s an art student.”
His words should ease my mind, but instead, I feel even more disgusted with myself. I needed to keep my feelings for Colt in check. They are swinging wildly back and forth between hatred and lust.
We climb into the car and ride in silence to the hotel. When we get inside our room, I mumble an apology to Colt.
“What was that?” He puts his hand to his ear, urging me to say it louder.
“I. Said. I'm. Sorry,” I say it slowly, enunciating each word.
He grins. “What were you so mad about anyway?” He unzips his duffle bag and pulls out a worn gray T-shirt. “It was your idea that I needed to get laid. Which reminds me – I didn’t, by the way.”
I watch as he unbuttons his shirt, my eyes traveling south along the path of his fingers. He peels the button down shirt off his shoulders, and stands in front of me in a snug fit white T-shirt and jeans riding low on his hips.
I blush and look away. “I’m going to go change,” I mutter.
I grab my backpack and head into the bathroom. Begging myself to get a grip, I splash cold water on my face and catch my reflection in the mirror. My cheeks are flushed pink, my eyes shining brightly. All my senses are lit up around him. Colt is a manwhore. I repeat in my head, and I am not this girl. I will not be this girl. I need to remember that.
I change into my pajamas, and practice deep breathing. When I come out, Colt’s in his room with the door closed, which is probably for the best.
I drift into a restless sleep wondering how it is one guy can both infuriate me and fascinate me so much.
Chapter 14
We’re both quiet on the drive into Cleveland. I think about the disapproval written all over Taylor’s face last night when I led Sarah back inside and introduced her.
I could tell it unnerved Taylor how much she and Sarah looked alike. But her reaction was the last thing I expected. She seemed genuinely upset. I didn’t understand why, but I knew I didn’t ever again want to be responsible for making her big blue eyes look up at me like that.
We make it to Cleveland in the late morning and check into the same hotel that Lars Kaiser is staying at. McAllister’s instructions in the envelope I gave Taylor say that she’s supposed to access his computer and copy over his files so we can find out who he’s working with, names and locations of where they may be planning to make their deals. This is a non-contact mission. He won’t even know we’re here. But still, it makes me nervous. Especially since we’re right under his nose. But I know McAllister’s right, he’d have no idea that we even exist.
Inside our hotel room, another two-bedroom suite, I drop my bag on my bed, then join Taylor in the living room. She gets straight down to business setting up her laptop on the desk. I have nothing to do, so I opt for pacing beside her, wearing a path in the thick carpeting, turning each time I reach the wall. I stop and watch over her shoulder as she eagerly clicks through screens I’ve never seen before.
“Anything I can do to help?” I ask.
She digs around inside her laptop bag, pulling out a few crumpled dollar bills. “Go get me a Diet Coke.”
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