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Cleaning, cooking and sewing? ? ?

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Do guys still like a woman who cleans, cooks and knows how to sew? The cleaning part is fine: everyone knows how to clean a toilet, but the cooking and sewing part - no way! I know how to do the microwave dinners but I can only boil water otherwise and I couldn't sew to save my life! I've heard guys like a meal served by their girlfriends once in a while. I really used to see of my Home Economics teacher, I was the worst student! Cooking and sewing classes are out for me as I have no time or money. Am I in trouble?

Betty, 23.

Well, don't worry about the sewing... how often do you really need something sewn anyway? Not that often usually. And for the cooking, I don't think it's that big of a deal really. Some guys (like me) love to cook; some don't care one way or the other. If you are really concerned, then try and learn 3or 4 easy recipes that you can fix. Get your mom or a friend to teach you, or experiment yourself, it could be a fun! Cooking isn't really that hard at all, and besides, there are tons more important things to think about, in a relationship than cooking, sewing and cleaning.

John, 20.

Alright this is where age gets given away. I'm from the old school and cook, clean, and sew. You would be surprised at how much knowing how to sew can be a real life saver, especially if you have children. It's also been said that a way to a man's heart is through his stomach. I love to cook and am a very good one. Proof of that is how the men in my life have always lost weight after our relationship had ended. I've actually found for me that men seem to like and appreciate the fact that I can keep a clean house, sew the things that need to be sewn, cook like a gourmet, and knock their socks off in the bedroom, and damn it I can keep up my end of a conversation too, as well as have my own business and be secure. No, I'm not wonder woman but you can be old fashioned in the 90's and still be up to par as well.

Jane, 39.

Where do you live? Just kidding. But seriously, all that sounds good to me. If any of it's missing, then perhaps you need to bring something else to the table like earning enough money to help have somebody else clean, sew, and put food on the table (housekeeper/maid). My ex took care of everything, but either did not work or worked part-time. Sure a lot of men like to cook; and many women work and both of you may be exhausted at the end of the day. So, somebody's got to do it even if it's a restaurant. So who's paying every night? My wife hates to cook and she earns good money and prefers going out every night. And she doesn't mind paying most of the time because we split household/lifestyle expenses. I prefer to come home to a home-cooked meal; but that's not in the cards. The maid who comes in weekly cleans and sews and picks up a few things at the store, dry cleaners, etc. And that's the way it is.

Kelly, 35.

I live in the Pacific Northwest and have for the majority of my life. I was raised on a farm where everyone had to work, pull their share of the load, and my whole family had different talents that we have carried into adulthood. My father was a horse trainer/blacksmith and his hobbies included silversmithing, skin-diving and underwater photography. As a matter of fact, my father is the one that taught me how to cook and sew as well as milk a cow and break a green horse. My mother was a housewife who also was well known for her leatherworking, she taught me the art of knitting and other needle points, and how to keep up a household. I believe that is the difference between myself and many other women of my age: the way I was raised. These do seem to have become lost art forms or talents and that is why some men DO appreciate finding a woman that possesses these qualities. Knowing how to do one or all of those things is simply a bonus.

A relationship isn't (and I hope shouldn't) be based upon whether a girl can cook, clean, etc. I myself love to cook and have been told I'm fairly good at it. I also can do most sewing that I've ever needed to do, same with cleaning. But I had to learn how to do most of that stuff from being in Boy-scouts when I was younger. "Always be prepared".

Jessica, 19.

I've been seeing this guy for about 7 months - he has a male roommate and they both are very messy. Last night I was over there and while my boyfriend was cooking I started washing the dishes. His roommate came in and said to me "Lisa your just way to nice". Is this a compliment or not? Does a woman lose her sex appeal if she also washes his dishes and massages his back for him? I usually do some kind of cleaning and massage his back almost every time I'm over. I started to think maybe I shouldn't be doing this because I don't want him to start taking me for granted.

Lisa, 21.

  1. Does your ideal partner possess these qualities?
  2. What else should he be able to do?

 

THE PROBLEMS OF BEING THE PERFECT HUSBAND

 

Read the story and tell your partner if you agree or disagree with the author’s point of view.

I don't like to say it, but I'm the perfect husband. I know being the perfect husband is a God-given talent, and you're either born with it or you're not.

What makes a perfect husband? It's quite simple. The perfect husband is the one who is able to see his wife's shortcomings, correct them if they need correcting, show her what she is doing wrong, and at the same time do nothing to harm the relations between the children and the father.

People will tell you that the happiest unions are those mixed marriages in which one of the mates is perfect and the other is not. Most marriages end in divorce when both mates are perfect or both mates are imperfect. In my case I was just lucky to find an imperfect wife, and because I'm perfect we've had a very happy marriage.

It isn't easy to be the perfect husband. You have to be right all the time, and sometimes it's a little difficult when I have to point out to my wife her mistakes all the time.

Sometimes she gets angry and shouts, "Why don't you let me win an argument just once — that's all I ask, let me win one, just once".

I would like her to win an argument, but how can I when she's always wrong. And how can a wife respect a man who says she is right and he is wrong.

Let me tell you about some of the problems a perfect husband has.

His wife has been at home all day with the children. Her nerves are in terrible state, and she screams, "Just wait until your father gets home". Now the perfect husband comes home. He must hear both sides - his wife's' and also the children's. In many cases I've had to decide against my wife. When she demanded, for example, that my son should go to bed without his supper, or that my daughter should not go skating with her friends, after hearing the arguments I had to decide in favour of the children. Naturally my wife is dis­appointed and at the time she can even be angry, but in the end I'm sure she understands that as a perfect husband 1 had no choice, As I'm also the perfect father I don't want the children to think badly of me.

As the perfect husband, I have, sometimes, had to point out to my wife the shortcomings in her relatives. Sometimes she feels I'm wrong in my criticism, and probably, being imperfect, she really believes this is so. But I try to explain to her that it is because of fa­mily love that she can't see it, and it is easier for me to see what's wrong with them.

There have been moments when she has tried to point out imper­fections in my family. But I said it was all nonsense, I have the perfect family - that explains why I'm the perfect husband.

If one is perfect in his home life he should also be perfect in his social life.

Let's take parties, for example. My wife has always felt that at a party I should talk and dance mostly with her, and some of our fights have been about it. It's hard for her to understand that she shouldn't be selfish about 'me. It is quite possible some of the women I talk to don't have perfect husbands of their own, and need a friendly ear or a kind smile. But all my wife says is that I'm flirting with another woman. It's absolute nonsense. I don't even think it necessary to answer it.

Some men think that to be a perfect husband they have to help around the house, clean the yard, look after the garden, and do other household chores. This is nonsense. The perfect husband is not the one who does the chores, but the one who knows what other people have to do about the house. Kings don't cook their own meals; presidents don't clean their flats; prime-ministers never wash their own cars. If you're the perfect husband you must let the people with imperfections do the dirty work.

If you're married to the perfect man you know what I'm talking about. If you're not, aren't you sorry you're not married to the perfect husband?

By Art. Buchwald


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