The Mighty Boosh (Radio Series) Jungle

The Mighty Boosh (Radio Series) "Jungle"

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Come with us now on a journey through time and space… To the world of the Mighty Boosh!

Vince (V): Hey, Howard, how is it going? I've got a very really weird day. Some joker dropped bamboo in the penguin enclosure and they all vaulted out. It's a nightmare, took me all morning to get them back in. What about you, have you had a good day?.. What's wrong with you?

Howard (H): Nothing. It's just the zoo's falling apart!!

V: What are you on about?

H: Look around the place is crumbling. You know, there's no animals we got worth speaking of.

V: What about Mr. Bollo?

H: Bollo, yeah, hundred-year-old ape, he's bringing them in and he stinks.

V: C'mon he's a wise old ape, he's brilliant.

H: Is he really?

V: Yes, he's got a gift he can talk, he tells me stuff.

H: Does he?

V: Yeah, he tells me about the future.

H: Really? The future? Does he tell you the future of this place, the way it's all collapsing, the way it's descending into nothingness and death and nothingness.

V: He doesn't deal in that kind of bleak imagery.

H: No, he doesn't. He deals in the imagery of you two riding off together on a banana horse to the land of magic... pies. It's not on. This place is falling apart. You know whose fault it is don't you.

V: Whose fault is it?

H: Bob Fossil.

V: Bob Fossil?

H: Coming over here with his fancy notions about how to run a zoo.

B: Announcement! Everyone, please keep away from the Muskrat cage he's completely naked, I don't want anybody see his rough hiney, except for the another Muskrat. And for the russian family, please stop using the spiders as eye-patches, you freak! I've got to read a book.

***

H: It was never like this. Not when Tommy run the zoo.

V: Oh God..

H: Tommy where are you now? Tommy where are you now? Tom-my - where-are-you?

V: He's dead.

H: Don't say that about Tommy.

V: He fell in the ocelot pit. Everybody knows that.

H: Did he? They never found his body.

V: They munched him down like an old Twix.

H: I find that very difficult to believe okay. Tommy was a big man.

V: So?

H: Yeah, what was he doing in the ocelot pit? He should have been in a chameleon boudoir. He was a lizard-man.

V: He was covering another keeper, that's quite simple.

H: Who was the other keeper?

V: Bob Fossil.

H: Bob Fossil, exactly. Do you see what I'm saying, see what I'm trying to build? You know, he was a big man, anyway, and ocelot was not a match for Tommy. Tommy was a big jungle warrior. Trained in the forest combat, you know he knew about how to deal.. he could handle himself. Tommy, he was a big man. A handsome man.

V: Handsome?

H: A brave man.

V: Handsome?

H: Yes.

V: I've seen footage of him. He had a big wide head.

H: Yeah.

V: Little stumpy legs.

H: Yeah, well that was the look wasn't it in the 1940s

V: What, the barrelhead?

H: It was all the rage the big head and short legs. Women would swoon when Tommy shuffled into a room. Didn't you know that?

V: I find that very hard to believe.

H: It's all true, a different aesthetic then. You know. I mean look at you now.

V: What? What's wrong with me?

H: Look at your feather cut, the little er jeans, the little bony face, cheek bones.

V: Yeah, I'm contemporary.

H: Yep, exactly transport you back to the 1940s. Yeah. You'd be immediately imprisoned for being a witch. Okay Tommy, the look, his look that was only one part of what Tommy had..

V: Really?

H: Yeah. One part of his all round package. Tommy was..

V: He was an all round package?

H: He was, and he had many other facets to his bow. This place he wanted to be a menagerie. Of exotic animals. All roaming around in their natural habitat. Not what I see now. What was Fossil doing, I look around as apes dressed in little blue pants..

V: I know it's shocking.

H: There's a fox dressed as a nurse.

V: It's not on

H: It's just that I've had enough. I'm going to find out what happened to Tommy. He wasn't killed. He's alive.

V: No..

H: I know he's alive.

V: Howard come on..

H: I can sense it and I'm going to find out what happened.

V: No way..

H: I'm gonna go

V: No Howard

H:..to where he was last seen, Vince.

V: No way!

H: I'm going the jungle room!

V: That is a kind of fresh madness.

H: Well I don't care I'm going there, ok.

V: No one's been in there..

H: Yeah

V: For years and years

H: Exactly.

V: For 25 years.

H: It's quite convenient.

V: It's all boarded up; you not even allowed in there Fossil says so.

H: Really. I don't care about Fossils little instructions. They call me the maverick. I'm going in there Vince. It's a dangerous mission and I'm asking you if you want to come with me, are you in?

V: I'd like to, but I got to play table tennis with Mr. Bollo.

H: Okay. Well at least I know where you stand thanks.

V: Ah!

H: It's a bit of a cheeky, ok. Get your stuff lets go to the jungle.

V: I can't I'm playing table tennis...Ah!

H: A second time you got me. Get your stuff. Can we go now?

V: I'm really playing table tennis. Ah! *slap* Owe!

H: See you in the jungle in an hour.

V: Ok..

***

V: Is it truth, what he said, Mr. Bollo? That I've realy been branded a witch in the 40s?

Bollo: Don't know.

V: Oh, good.

B: Banana horse is good and we're flying a horse..a banana... good

V: Ok, I was a bit worries for a while.

B: Are you happy now?

V: Yeah.

B: Ok, let's go.

Bob Fossil: Moon! Moon where the hell are you? Hey, you over there.

Zookeeper: Who? Me?

B: No, King Tat.

ZK: Hello.

B: Yeah, have you seen Howard Moon? Big tall guy looks like a freak giraffe?

ZK: No way, I ain't seen him all morning.

B: All right, well, listen. The zoo is falling apart. What are the russians do in my booth?? Listen! You! The baboons are naked. Their tits are flapping all over the place. They need some bra! Quick! Pronto, get them on!

ZK: I'll see what I can do.

B: All right, you do it fast! I've got to get to the booth! Jees! I need some progs!

***

V: Hey, mate. Mate, I need your help.

ZK: Hello there, fella. I know who are you.

V: What?

ZK: You are the guy who plays table tennis with apes.

V: Yeah, that's right.

ZK: How did you got beaten today?

V: What?

ZK: Pretty bad..

V: What?

ZK: That Bollo whooped your ass today.

V: Who told you that?

ZK: Bollo.

V: He's such a liar!

ZK Oh?

V: He's a filthy liar! Anyway, that's none of your business. I need your help. Where is the jungle room?

ZK: Well, sometimes if you are looking for some place it can help to look inside yourself..

V: What?

ZK: Just something I said

V: Where is the jungle room?

ZK: [?] you'll find it there

V: Ok, cheers, thanks man, oh, and if you see Fossil don't tell him you saw me whatever you do.

ZK: You are in the rush, sometimes it's help to look around at the tree

V: Yep, cheers mate

ZK: Oh. The tree is a man and a man is a tree...

***

B: What the hell, get the freak outa here! NO VODKA! Get outa here!! Shut the DOOR! Howard Moon!! Where the hell are you????

V: Howard...Howard.. oh, where is he?

H: Vince, Vince, Vince what are you doing? Monkeys, leave he, leave him be!

V: Beaten by the old apes..

H: Vince, what's the matter?

V: I'm so unluck, I fell right in the monkey pit. All this big massive monkeys with long stringy arms poking me in the eyes and little monkeys all getting me bellybutton.

H: Calm down, you are all right. Why you come dressed like that in a forest?

V: Like what?

H: Like that, like a Camden leisure pirate.

V: I'm in the band!

H: And a big silver boots..it's not going to fit in the forest.

V: Listen, I'm in the band, what if I have to play gig at the drop of a hat*?

H: We are in the forest.

V: Yeah, l might have to do a benefit for some pine cones.

H: Listen, we are in the forest! You've got to blend and look what have going on here. This is my look, check it out. Forest casual.

V: Forest casual?

H:.. for the leafy gent. You see what I'm looking like? Come on now.

V: You look like a knob.

H: Oh, hey! You've got to respect the forest, ok. You've got to get with the brake, you've got to move with the moss. You've got to speak the forest language, Vince. Cor-demahek-ayyy...

V: What? Is he french, the forest?

H: Don't mock the forest, ok. Please, don't mock the forest.

V: I don't mock forest.

H: Don't mock forest.

V: I don't mock forest.

H: No no no.

V: Forest is flimsy fool.

H: You mock forest, forest sense mockage.

V: Really?

H: He come at you fast lake screaming ball of all of hot bark! You dunno wha'ts happening you wake up in France riding round on a cheese horse going 'eurhg me brea hoof, eurgh me edam-..

V: Howard, Howard, look at this.

H: What's that?

V: It's the door in this tree.

H: oh my god...

V: What?

H: This is the place... Tommy spoke of this place..

V: Really?

H: He must have been here

V: No way…

H: Knock at the door!

V: Maybe he is inside.

H: I'll do with this.

*knock knock*

*the door opens*

Guard: Oh, hello my little pretty, my little angel. Are we to be married on the morrow, my tiny little child?

H: What?

G: Oh sorry I thought you're pretty lady... do beg your pardon.

H: Can we come in, please?

G: What for?

H: For… We're looking for someone.

G: Oh really?

H: Yeah we're looking for a... Tommy.

G: Tommy?

H: Tommy Nookah. Have you seen him?

G: Tommy Nookah?

H: Tommy Nookah very a...wide-head-short-legged man.

G: Maybe I have seen him, maybe I haven't.

H: Have you seen him?

G: Lots of people come through here. How could you POSSIBLY expect me to remember??

H: Well, can we come in anyway?

G: Oh maybe you can.. oh, yes, you can come in.. yes, of course you can come in, you can come in, OK, but you can never leave..

H: ok.

G: Do you understand the concept?

H: Yes.

G: You can come in but you can never leave.

H: That's fine.

G: No, listen to me. It's.. it's like a membrane, not a two-way membrane but one-way membrane. If you come in this place - that's it - it's over. You could never leave

H: We haven't got much on.

Литл Кен [wtf?]: See you then all of you

G: Bye, Литл Кен.

H: Oh, so he can leave..

G: Oh he can leave all right. Look at him leaving like a little conker in the night, oh he can live little {кен??? }. Do you know why he can leave? Because he is too small. He is too small for the membrane...

H: Vince, this guy is insane!

V: I know, I know. Look, let me do with him, all right? Another word with him.

V: Erm.. Hi, I'm Vince Noir rock'n'roll star. You probably heard about me I'm in the band actually.

G: Oh, you're in the band, are you? Oh, I see. Why didn't you say that in the first place? Ok, then you go.

V: Told ya..

H: Yeah, all right.

G: You are aware of our policy, are you?

V: Whatever.

G: Ok, downstairs further on the left....

*the door closes*

H: Why do you have to lie all the time?

V: What do you mean? I am in the band.

H: Well, yeah, but.. you know.. we are in the band, are we?

V: We could be...

***

Bob Fossil: Come on, chimpy, put on this bra. Quick, your tits are all over the place. Come on, little chimp.

Zookeeper: Hey there, Mr. Fossil.

B: Look at you!

ZK: How are you doing?

B: Yeah! I'm doing your job over here! That's what I'm doing. Come on, chimp.

ZK: Just to let you know that I was erm.. passing by a lion enclosure there, Mr. Fossil.

B: Yeah, what?

ZK: Looked up and saw a guy.. he looked like he was gonna jump.

B: Oh, not another jumper.

ZK: Oh, It's sad day..

B: I can't do everything. Have you found Moon yet?

ZK: I am afraid I haven't seen him.

B: What about Vince? He's got a great face, he can charm him down with his face..

ZK: I haven't.. seen.. him.. either.

B: Well, what am I gonna DO??

ZK: Hey!

B: I don't know!!

ZK: Mr. Fossil, calm down.

ZK: You know, sometimes when you get upset or the world ain't treat you right..

B: Yeah?

ZK: What I do is a look on up at the sky. Look on up an oooold Mr. Moon. He don't worry, he just keep on shining down.

B: Who the FREAK are you??

ZK: They call me.. [песня]

***

H: Wow, this place is amazing!

V: I know, it's outrageous!

H: Huge! I'm going over there to mingle, ok?

V: Ok.

H: Erm.. to see if anyone have seen Tommy.

V: And I'm gonna have some peanuts.

Entertainer: Good evening and welcome to club "&*%&$(*&". You are on after the next act.

V: What do you mean?

E: Well, you are the band...

V: What, no. No no, we ARE. Yeah, we are the band.

H: All right..

V: No no, we are the band.. We are Howard and Vince... the Ladder...

H:..Coins..

V: The Ladder Coins!

E: Yes! The Ladder Coins. Here are your refreshments...

V: Oh, wow, great.

E:..in the dressing room.

V: Cream soda.

E: Yes and pickles too.

H: Hm.. great.

V: All right. See you after the gig then.

E: You are aware of the policy..

V: Yeah, whatever.

H: Actually, no.. I forgot it.. What was it again?

E: Actually, it's very simple. It's base on ancient roman gladiators.

If you perform well - you leave.

If you play badly the penalty is death.

If the crowd likes you anyway - death.

If the gig goes badly - death.

It it starts out well and then goes a bit shaky - death.

Enjoy the gig! Bye.

***

H: Vince, I'm gonna hurt you so much.

V: Look, I didn't know, did I?

H: I'm gonna take you to the Land of Hurt.

V: I didn't know about the policy.

H: What are we gonna do?

V: It will be all right.

H: Vince, we are going to die..

V: You've seen me on stage - I'm a mesmerizer!!

H: You are mes.. You are gonna mesmerize the audience into thinking you've got a band

V: It will be all right.

H:..and we've got instruments..

V: No, we'll just improvise. Don't worry about that.

H: What do you mean 'improvise'?? Who are you??

V: Don't worry about it, all right. Come on. Let's go and check out this first guy.

E: And now..Bruno Mindhorn.

?????????????????????

* at the drop of a hat [idiom] - if you do something at the drop of a hat, you do it suddenly and easily, often without any preparation

*

Yeah, what was he doing in the ocelot pit? He should have been in a [? cominian какой-то? boudoir as a lizard man]

при чем там lizard man.. да потому что он должен был быть в Chameleon (!) boudoir

Bruno Mindhorn: My name is Mindhorn. Bruno Mindhorn. I swim backwards, forwards, sideways. I'm in love with a woman, she's got no eyes. I found her drawing cows near Brugge. I don't know her name, I call her Mrs China. She were a coiffure but it ended in bloodshed. Now she lives in a glass case in the town hall in Ghent. And every three years on a tuesday I dust her...

H: Was it a bit good, this Bruno

V: What do you mean?

H: Hi's going down the storm*, look at him

V: His act is weak.

H: How we are going to follow this?

V: Look, if they like this - they gonna LOVE us!

E: Bruno Mindhorn.

*audience cheering*

E: We love you, Bruno. You shall leave to play another day. And now next on the bill at club "&*%&$(*&" a new act. Very exciting. The Ladder Coins.

V: Good evening, we are The Ladder Coins and we've got some stuff for you.

Audience: "DEATH DEATH DEATH"

***

H: Great! I'm really glad I brought you along in this trip, Vince.

V: It's not my fault, is it? That was a nightmare, that crowd.

Prisoner: Hey.

H: I know. There's someone in the next cell.

V: Hi! Hello!

H: Don't, Vince. Don't. Don't do that.

V:What?

H: You are in prison now. You gonna let people know who you are, what you are about, you know. Show them who is boss. I'll do with this...

P: Hellooo...

H: HELLO! Hello there! Hi! Howard Moon I'm in the next cellar. I'm just wanna say I'm.. I'm new in a.. on the block.. erm.. in some here.. so I'm.. not even try it with us what I'm saying.. so just spread that around, will you?

P: I'm gonna kill you with a brick...

H: a-a-hhh..

P: I'm gonna bust your head...

H: VINCE, VINCE!

V: Stop panicking

H: Vince

V: I've heard what he said, just stop panicking, all right?

H: What are we gonna do??

V: Just give me a second to think, all right?

H: All right.

V: Ok, just be quiet.

H: Ok.

V: Let me think, i'll think of something.

P: I'm gonna crush your body...

H: Vince, wake up! Vince! Oh, god!

P: I'm gonna snap your nose off..

H: Vince!

***

B: Ok.

Jumper: Get away..

B: Listen up, look. Let's go through this again.

J: Oh..

B: Your wife doesn't love you, you're ugly, you're an asshole, your eyes sting, you've got no job, no prospects, your mommy think you're a looser. All I'm saying is if you jump.. jump to the right over there. The lions had already eaten, but [?]. I try to run a zoo! My staff's all run off. I've got topless baboons..

J: AAaahhhhh

B: I said "to the RIGHT", looser. Oh, Jeez.. Somebody, scoop that up.

***

G: Are we to be married on the morrow, my pretty child, my sweet angel?

T: I beg your pardon, sir.

G: Oh, sorry, I thought you are a lovely lady.

T: I'm a traveling hobo, you've pass them through.

G: Hm..really. You do realize if you came in here, you could never leave?

T: Yep[?], I'm intend to come in there, sir

G: Yeaaah, That's what they all say, but if you came in here by accident, if you follow the puffin in here and you only came for a.. brief..

T: Sir!

G:...then I could shut the door and say it's over

T: Will you calm down?

G: If you only say 'I come in for a moment' I'll shut the door and say it's over for you..

T: Calm down now, sir!

G: Never leave, you could never leave, youcouldneverleave. Nay!

T: You spit it all over.

G: Nooo, oh.. I'm so stressed.

T: You need to relax, you sir.

G: I know..

T: What's the matter?

G: I don't know.. it's this job.. it's getting me down.. on my arms, legs, I mean I'm so lonely here, working at the club door. I mean..I just... just want to met a lovely lady..

T: Oh, I hear you. I know that feeling.

G: Yes...

T: Sometimes if you are lonely, sir, it can help to sing a song, you know that?

G: Really?

T: Yep.

G: It's not a bad idea.

T: It's tasty rhythm, ok, let's go.

*and the song goes*

Are we to be married on the morrow my child or will I always be alone?

Are we to be together forever and a day or will life always be this way?

Because I dreamed of a hedge

Where you laid your head

The grass was red

The seagull screamed

What can it mean?

Was it just a dream?

Am I too obscene for your eyes?

Are we to be married on the morrow my child?

Or will life always be this way?

Or will life always be this way

Sing it now

Or will life always be this way?

Sing only...

Can I ever love?

Will I ever touch?

Can I ever see?

Can I ever dream?

Will I ever be?

Can I ever find what I need?

I can't see I can't breathe

Yeah

I`m spiraling down in infinity

Oh look what you did

You came into my wood

With your tiny little eyes and your hair made of wool

Now it`s over (wooh)

Now I loved you and oh how I needed you

Oh lying down on the floor

Like a crispy noodle cup boy (yeah)

Dreaming that you were once the child of a wolf

With your paper arms and wrists

I worshiped you

I needed you

With your see-through scorpion underbelly

And your tiny little claws

Hammering away at the pigeons eyebrow

Climbing up your head as if were an elaborate childнs climbing frame

Oh, ladders to the moon

With your cardboard page three paisley silver eyes

(Sing it now, sing it now, sing it now) [repeat]

And value of your structured silhouette

Creeping around you like a Chinese cad-bury wolf

It`s over

I hate you

It`s over (oh yeah)

G: It seems you've done the trick. Thank you.

T: Glad to be of service. Take care now.

G: Bye!

***

P: I'm gonna suck a meat from your face... I'm gonna hammer you flat and then scrape you off the floor like a piece of liner.

H: Yeah yeah yeah yes, ok. Can you just pipe down for a little bit now, please?

P: What?

H: Well, you know.. Do you have to go on like this all the time [?] level. Spent three hours now and I'm gonna be a bit cheesed off.

P: I'm pure evil.

H: Yep, I know you are. It's very.. good. I'm very proud of you. Can you just, you know.. shut up now, please? I mean it must be boring for you - never mind me - me.. kinda.. just very the levels or something, you know..start small, build up - it's dynamics.

P: I'm not sute I understand what are you saying.

H: Well.. did you always do evil things in your life?

P: Oh, yeaaaah, I'm pure evil. And all I'm interested is evil.

H: Yeah, but.. I mean when you were young, you know, I'm sure there was something you did before you were evil that was, you know, not evil.

P: Hm.. don't know about that. Oh, when I was a nipper I used to fly kites and I loved it. I used to design my own kites and take them in the [?] staying there in the afternoon sun.

H: There's something there! Right there, look at that, flying a kite in the afternoon. That's something that's more like it. You see, you can tell people about that and then they could make their stay here - in this prison - a little bit less painfull, wouldn't it? and ease attention to this place a littel bit, you know.

P: I don't know. I don't know if it will work. I mean.. I'll give it a try. And then I.. go and write a few ideas down.

H: Yeah, that's a good idea, go on and write a few ideas down. I would be here If you need me.

H: No..

T: Howard Moon.

H: Please, no. I don't want to die now.. I can't die now.. I've got to much to give..

T: Shut up, I'm trying to rescue you. Come, follow me and bring your companion.

H: Oh, right! Ok, yeah yeah yeah. Vince! Vince, Vince, wake up. We've being rescued.

T: No, leave him asleep, he will be less conspicuous that way. Place him in this [?]. Lets go!

***

T: Follow me. Quick. This way. Now stop. Sleep. Wake up, there's no time. Comb your hair. Let us whistle. Stop. The time for whistling has now past we must continue. Follow me. Come. Let us go through the lake.

H: I can't swim.

T: Leap on to my huge head. Come. Follow me. Touch me. No, I don't like that. Climb up this bank now.

H: Oh, no, I've forgotten Vince.

T: Don't worry, I'll go back, you wait here. Solve this puzzle whilst I'm gone. Here's pen and paper for you. Have you solved the puzzle?

H: Eeerm..

T: 4 across was 'emu'.

H: Yeah.

T: Anyway. There's no time. Come. Into this bush. Climb aboard these mules, they are lame. Shoot them and sell them for offal. Get a good price. That was a good price! It's pretty much straight on for about 2 miles now.

T: This is my humble dwelling, we will be safe here.

H: That was quite the journey, Have we lost them do you think?

T: Who?

H: The people that chasing us.

T: There was no one chasing us, distance is its own reward. Come. Warm yourself by my fire.

H: Who are you? Who hides his face behind the mask?

T: I thought you would recognize me by my voice, but very well.. I'll reveal myself.

H: Oh my god!

T: Yes, It is I, Tommy.

H: Tommy! Thought you were dead...

T: A-ha-ha-ha. I'll tell you the story of how I came to be here over a simple broth which I have prepared, but first wake your companion.

H: Vince! Vince! Vince, we're free. We've escaped.

V: I've told ya I've think of something.

H: Yeah yeah yeah.

T: Oh my god, your friend. He has the appearance of a witch.

V: What?

T: Yes, his face is all bony, boned up.

V: Have you heard of [?] you stocky hummer-head?

H: Vince, This is Tommy.

V: All right..

H: He rescued us.

V: Oh, sorry.

H: He's alive, look!

T: Come now. Let us not dwell on appearances.

V: Not yours, you back of the..

H: Vince!

T: Calm! Calm! Let us enjoy the simple broth I have prepared for us.

T: And it was on that night that I realized I would stay here in the forest and make a home for myself and take a wife. So I settled here and I planted seeds: parsley, radish, weed, cress, barley, but no corn for I couldn't find any. And I remember thinking what a bizarre twist of fate that there should be barley, cress, weed..

V: Howard, this bloke is so boring..

H: Shhh, I know.. I know.

T:...oh how I laughed of a contemplated the corn.. the situation that I've found myself in. And I told my friend Christoff, I said, Christoff what kind of a mad world are we living in..

V: He is rubbish.

H: I know, he used to be interesting when I was young, I don't know how.. he was much more impressive then. His head seemed wider.

V: It looks ridiculous.

T:... but I need them. And I said 'can I borrow one?', he went 'no', and I said 'Very well, may I take a picture of them so let me show them to my wife'. And he agreed and [.. blah-blah-blah]

V: Can we go?

H: No! Just.. at least during a curtsey of listing to the last of his story. I think he's finishing up.

T:..and so..that's end of the First Chapter of my life story. Now there will be an interval and my son Soul will sing. Soul was a mute for 30 years until one day not only did he speak but the boy sang. So now, please, I give you my son Soul with his song, everything I have ever seen but have been unable to talk about until now. I will accompany on the French Horn.

H: Vince, where are you going?

V: I'm going, I've had enough.

H: Don't leave me here.

V: I've got to get out.

H: I can't wait here.

V: Oh come on, let's go.

H: All right.

Son: First I saw the soil, then I saw a pebble, then I saw a leaf.

V: Oh, we get out of there. I thought it was never gonna end.

H: Yeah. Come on, let's get back to the zoo.

V: Yeah.

H: What an adventure then, wasn't in?

V: Quite an adventure.

H: Yeah.

V: What? Charging about a forrest all day just to find out your mate is really boring.

H: Yeah, but we've learned a valuable lesson, didn't we? You know..

V: What?

H: That heroes have feet of clay**...

V:..and really big heads. He was so weird looking...

H: Absolutely terrifying..

***

P: Hello

Some new prisoner: Who's there?

P: I'll make you a nice little kite...

S: Kite?

P: Yeaaaah.

S: What?

P: I'm gonna make you a nice little kite and take you to the windy place...

S: I don't wanna go.. windy place?

P: Imagine it! Tight silk stretched over.. (...)??

S: Guard!

P:..flapping in the sky...

S: Guard! Get me outa this place!!! GUARD!!!!

?????????????????????

* To say that something has been enjoyable or successful, you can say that it has gone down a storm.

** have feet of clay [idiom] Fig. [for a strong person] to have a defect of character. "All human beings have feet of clay. No one is perfect."

Дата добавления: 2015-11-05