He told himself, "The most ancient remaining human structures, on the face of the earth or carved inside it, are temples. Even today, no area is free of them. When will man grow up and depend on himself? That loud voice coming from the far corner of the mosque reminds people of the end. When has there ever been an end to time? How beautiful it would be to see man wrestle with his illusions and vanquish them. But when will the struggle cease and the fighter announce that he's happy and that the world looks so different that it might have been created the day before? These two men are my father and brother. Why shouldn't all men be my fathers and brothers? How could thisheart I carry within me let itself torment me in so many different ways? How frequently throughout the day I'm confronted by people I don't like…. Why should the friend I love have departed to the ends of the earth?"
When they finished praying, the father said, "Let's rest here a little before circling the tomb."
They sat there silently, their legs folded beneath them, until the father said gently, "We haven't been here together since that day."
Yasin replied emotionally, "Let's recite the 'Fatiha' for Fahmy's spirit."
They recited the opening prayer of the Qur'an, and then the father asked Yasin somewhat suspiciously, "I wonder whether worldly affairs have not kept you from visiting al-Husayn."
Yasin, who had not set foot in the mosque all those years except a handful of times, answered, "I don't let a week go by without visiting my master al-Husayn."
The father turned toward Kamal and cast him a glance as if to ask, "And you?"
Feeling embarrassed, Kamal replied, "Me too!"
The father said humbly, "He's our loved one and our intercessor with his grandfather Muhammad on a day when no mother or father can be of any assistance."
He had recovered from his illness this time, but only after it had taught him a lesson he would not forget. He had found its violence convincing and feared a recurrence. His intention to repent was sincere. He had always believed he would repent, no matter how long he waited. He was now certain that postponing it after this sickness would be stupidity and a blasphemous rejection of God's blessings. Whenever he happened to think of forbidden amusements, tie consoled himself with the innocent pleasures awaiting him in life, like friendship, music, and jests. Therefore he entreated God to preserve him from the whispered temptations of Satan and to strengthen his resolve to repent. He proceeded to recite some of the Qur'an's simpler, shorter suras that he knew by heart.
When he rose, his sons did too. Then they went to the sepul-cher, where they were greeted by the sweet fragrance pervading the place and a murmur of whispered recitations. They walked around the tomb with the throngs of visitors. Kamal's eyes looked up at the great green turban and then rested for a time on the wooden door, which he had kissed so often. He compared the present with the past and his former state of mind with his current one. He remembered how revelation of this tomb's secret had been the first tragedy in his life and then how the succession of tragedies following it had carried off love, belief, and friendship. Despite all that, he was still standing on his own two feet as he gazed worshipfully at truth, so heedless of the jabs of pain that even his bitterness caused him to smile. He had no regrets over his rejection of the blind happiness illuminating the faces of the men circumatubulating the tomb. How could he buy happiness at the price of light when he had vowed to live with his eyes open? He preferred to be anxious and alive rather than comfortable and sleepy. He chose wakeful insomnia over restful sleep.
When they had finished walking around the sepulcher, the father invited them to rest for a while in the shelter of the shrine. They went to a corner and sat down next to each other. Some acquaintances noticed al-Sayyid Ahmad and approached to shake hands and congratulate him on his recovery. Some stayed to sit with them. Most of them knew Yasin either from his father's store or from al-Nahhasin School, but hardly anyone knew Kamal. Some of them noticed how thin the boy was and one jokingly asked al-Sayyid Ahmad, "What's wrong with this son of yours? He's skinny as a ramrod."
As if returning the man's compliment with an even nicer one, al-Sayyid Ahmad shot back, "No, you're the ram!"
Yasin smiled. Kamal did too, for this was the first chance he had had to observe his father's secret personality of which he had heard so much. His father was obviously a man who would not miss a chance for a little joke even when he was beside the tomb of al-Husayn in a sacred place devoted to praise of God and repentance. Yasin was inspired to reflect on his father's future, wondering whether al-Sayyid Ahmad would return to his previous joys even after this serious illness.
Yasin told himself, "Knowing this is extremely important to me."
UMM IIANAFI was sitting cross-legged on a mat in the sitting room while Aisha's daughter Na'ima and Khadija's sons Abd al-Muni'm and Ahmad sat on the sofa opposite her. The two windows overlooking the courtyard of the house were open because of the hot, humid August weather, but scarcely a breeze stirred and the large lamp suspended from the ceiling cast a steady light throughout the room. The bedrooms opening off the sitting room seemed dark and silent. Umm Hanafi'shead was bowed, and her arms were folded across her chest. She would look up at the children on the sofa for a moment and then lower her eyes again. She said nothing but her lips never stopped moving.
Abd al-Muni'm asked, "How long will Uncle Kamal stay on the roof?"
Umm Hanafi muttered, "It's hot down here. Why didn't you stay up there with him?"
"It's dark, and Na'ima's afraid of bugs."
Ahmad asked angrily, "How long are we going to remain here? This is the second week. I'm counting every day. I want to go back to Papa and Mama."
Umm Hanafi said hopefully, "God willing, you'll all return and be in the best possible shape. Pray to God, for He answers the requests of pure young children."
Abd al-Muni'm said, "We pray before we go to sleep and when we wake up, just the way you instructed us."
The woman said, "Pray to God all the time. Pray to Him now. He's the only one who can remove our distress."
Abd al-Muni'm spread out his hands in prayer and looked at Ahmad to invite him to join in. The vexed look still on his face, Ahmad complied. Then they repeated together, as they had grown accustomed to during the last few days, "O Lord, cure Uncle Khalil and our cousins Uthman and Muhammad so we can return home with minds at ease."
The impact this made on Na'ima was apparent in her face. Her features had a sad look and her blue eyes were filled with tears. She cried out, "Papa, Uthman, and Muhammad how are they? I want to see Mama. I want to see all of them."
Abd al-Muni'm turned toward her to say in a consoling voice, "Don't cry, Na'ima. I've told you repeatedly not to cry. My uncle's fine. Uthman's fine. Muhammad's fine. We'll return home soon. Grandmother said so. Uncle Kamal said so too not very long ago."
Na'ima, who was sobbing, said, "I hear this every day. But they don't let us return. I want to see Papa, Uthman, and Muhammad. I want Mama."
Ahmad grumbled, "I want Papa and Mama too."
Abd al-Muni'm said, "We'll go back when they're well."
Na'ima cried out anxiously, "Let's go back now. I want to go home. Why are they keeping us away?"
Abd al-Muni'm replied, "They're afraid we'll catch the disease."
Na'ima answered stubbornly, "Mama's there. Aunt Khadija's there. Uncle Ibrahim's there. Grandmother's there. Why won't they catch it?"
"Because they're adults!"
"If adults can't catch diseases, why is Papa sick?"
Umm Hanafi sighed and said tenderly, "Is something upsetting you? This is your house too. And here are Masters Abd al-Muni'm and Ahmad to play with you. And your Uncle Kamal loves you more than all the world. You'll soon return to Mama, Papa, Uthman, and Muhammad. Don't cry, little lady. Pray for Papa and your brothers to get well."
Ahmad complained, "Two weeks! I've counted the days on my fingers. Besides, our apartment's on the third floor, and the disease is on the second. Why can't we return to our apartment and take Na'ima with us?"
Umm Hanafi put a finger to her lips as though to caution them and said, "Your uncle Kamal will get angry if he hears what you said. He buys you chocolates and melon seeds. How can you say you don't want to stay with him? You're not babies anymore. Master Abd al-Muni'm, you'll be starting primary school in a month. And you will too, dear Na'ima."
Backing down a little, Ahmad said, "At least let us go outside to play in the street."
Abd al-Muni'm seconded that suggestion: "That makes sense, Umm Hanafi. Why don't we go out and play in the street?"
Umm Hanafi replied firmly, "You have the courtyard, which is as big as the universe. And you also have the roof terrace. What more do you want than that? When Mr. Kamal was young, he only played in the house. When I finish my work, I'll tell you stories. Wouldn't you like that?"
Ahmad protested, "Yesterday you told us you'd finished all your stories."
Drying her eyes, Na'ima said, "Aunt Khadija knows more stories. If Mama washere we could sing together."
Umm Hanafi said ingratiatingly, "I keep begging you to sing for us and you refuse."
"I can't sing here. I can't sing when Uthman and Muhammad are sick."
Sighing, the woman said, "I'll fix supper for you, and then we'll go to bed. How about some cheese, watermelon, and cantaloupe?"
Kamal was sitting in a chair on the open side of the roof, next to the arbor of jasmine and hyacinth beans. He was scarcely visible in the darkness except for his loose-fitting white house shirt. His legs stretched out languidly, he looked at the sky studded with stars. He was lost in thought, and the silence encompassing him was broken only by an occasional voice from the street or a cluck from the chicken house. The family's affliction during the last two weeks had left its imprint on his face. During this time the normal household routine had been disrupted, and his mother had disappeared except for rare moments. The atmosphere of the house was transformed by the complaints of the three young prisoners who hs. d roamed its expanses asking for Papa and Mama until Kamal had run out of stratagems for cajoling and amusing them.
Over on Sugar Street, Aisha no longer sang or laughed in the way that had once caused so much talk. She stayed up nights with her beloved family of invalids - her husband and her sons. Kamal had yearned for Aisha to return to her old home when he was young. Now he was extremely apprehensive that she would be forced to return, her wing broken and her heart shattered.
His mother had whispered to him, "Don't visit Sugar Street, and if you do, don't stay long". He did go there occasionally and would leave with his hands smelling strangely of disinfectants and hisheart overwhelmed by anxiety.
The most amazing thing was that typhoid germs, like other ones, were incredibly tiny and invisible to the naked eye but capable of stopping the flow of a life, deciding the destiny of men, and breaking up a family. Poor Muhammad had been the first to fall ill. Uthman had been next. Finally and unexpectedly, the father had succumbed.
The maid Suwaydan had come to tell Kamal that his mother would spend the night at Sugar Street. Quoting his mother without comment, she had added that there was no cause for concern. If that was so, why was his mother staying over? Why did his breast feel such forebodings? Despite all this, it was always possible that the gloom might disperse in the twinkling of an eye. Khalil Shawkat and his two darling sons might recover. Aisha's face might sparkle and shine. Could he forget how the household had suffered through a similar ordeal only eight months before? And now his father was up and about, hishealth totally restored. His muscles had regained their strength and his eyes their attractive sparkle. He had returned to his friends and loved ones like a bird to the leafy tree. So who could deny that it was possible for everything to change in the twinkling of an eye?
"You're here alone!"
Kamal recognized the voice. Turning toward the door of the roof, he rose and stretched out his hand to the newcomer, saying, "How are you, brother? Have a seat."
Kamal got a chair for Yasin, who was breathing heavily after climbing up the stairs. Filling his chest with the scent of jasmine, he sat down and said, "The children have gone to sleep and Umm Hanafi has too."
Resuming his seat, Kamal asked, "What time is it? The poor kids won't rest and won't let anyone else rest either."
"It's eleven. The air here's a lot better than on the street."
"Where have you been?"
"Back and forth between Palace of Desire and Sugar Street. By the way, your mother's not coming home tonight."
"Suwaydan told me that. What's new? I've been extremely apprehensive."
Sighing, Yasin said, "We're all anxious. Our Lord is gracious. Our father's there too."
"Atriiishour!"
"I left him there". After a pause he continued: "I was at Sugar Street until eight this evening. Then a messenger came from Palace of Desire Alley to say that my wife's labor had begun. I went immediately to Umm Ali, the midwife, and took her to my house, where I found my wife was being cared for by some neighbors. I stayed there an hour but could not bear the moaning and screaming for long. I went back to Sugar Street again and found Father sitting with Ibrahim Shawkat."
"What does this mean? Tell me what you think."
In a low voice Yasin said, "Their condition's extremely grave."
"Grave?"
"Yes. I came here to try to calm my nerves. Couldn't Zanuba have picked some other night to have a baby? I'm exhausted from going back and forth between Palace of Desire and Sugar Street, between the doctor and the midwife. Their condition's critical. When Widow Shawkat looked at her son's face she cried out, 'Protect; us, Lord. You should have taken me first.' Your mother was very alarmed, but the old lady paid no attention to her and said in a hoarse voice, 'This is what members of the Shawkat family look like when they die. I saw his father and his uncle die, and his grandfather before them.' There's nothing left of Khalil but a shadow, and the children are the same way. There's no power or might save with God."
Kamal swallowed and said, "Perhaps these suspicions are unfounded."
"Perhaps…. Kamal, you're not a child anymore. You ought to know at least what I do. The doctor said the situation's critical."
"For all of them?"
"All! Khalil, Uthman, and Muhammad. O Lord! How wretched your luck is, Aisha…."
In the darknesshe imagined Aisha's laughing family as he had seen them in the past. They were joyful, happy individuals who pursued life as though it were an innocent entertainment.
"When will Aisha be able to laugh again?" Kamal wondered. "Fahmy was snatched away. The English or typhoid, it's all the same … like any other cause. Belief in God makes death seem a bewildering but wise decree, when actually it's nothing but a cruel joke."
"That's the most atrocious thing I've ever heard."
"That it is, but what can anyone do? What has Aisha done to deserve this? O God, forgiveness and mercy…."
"Is there any sublime philosophy that can justify mass slaughter?" Kamal asked himself. "Death follows the rules for jokes precisely. Yet how can we laugh when we're the butt of the joke. Perhaps I'd be able to meet it with a smile if I could always confront it with contemplation, understanding, and impartiality. That would be a victory over both life and death. But what would any of this mean to Aisha?"
"My head's spinning, brother."
In the sagest voice Kamal had ever heard him use, Yasin remarked, "This is the way the world is. You must come to know it as it really is". Then he rose suddenly and said, "I've got to go now."
Kamal implored him, "Stay with me a little longer."
But Yasin answered apologetically, "It's eleven. I must go to Palace of Desire Alley to reassure myself about Zanuba. Then I'll return to Sugar Street to be with them. I won't sleep an hour tonight, it seems. And by God I know what's awaiting us tomorrow."
Kamal stood up and said with alarm, "You talk as though it was all over. I'm going to Sugar Street right away."
"No, you must stay with the children until morning. Try to get some sleep. Otherwise I'll regret speaking so frankly to you."
Yasin left the roof of the house and Kamal accompanied him downstairs to the door. When they passed the top floor, where the children were sleeping, Kamal said sorrowfully, "What poor kids! Na'ima's wept bitterly during the past few days, as though her heart sensed what would happen…."
Yasin replied frankly, "The children will soon forget. Pray for the grown-ups."
As they went into the courtyard, they could hear a voice from the street crying out, "Special edition of al-Muqattamy"
Kamal murmured inquisitively, "A special edition for the paper?"
In a sad voice, Yasin said, "Oh! I know what it's about. When I was on my way here, I heard people spreading the news. Sa'd Zaghlul has died."
Kamal cried out from the depths of hisheart, "Sa'd?"
Yasin stopped walking and turned toward his brother to say,"Don't take it so hard. We have enough problems of our own."
Kamal stared into the darkness without speaking or moving. He seemed oblivious to Khalil, Uthman, Muhammad, and Aisha, to everything except the death of Sa'd Zaghlul.
Yasin walked on and remarked, "He died after receiving his full share of life and greatness. What more would you wish for him than that? May God be merciful to him."
Still stunned, Kamal followed him silently. He did not know how he would have received this news in circumstances that were not so grim. When disasters come at the same time, they compete with each other. Thus Kamal's grandmother had died soon after Fahmy had been slain, at a time when no one had tears to spare for her. So Sa'd was dead. The hero of the exile, the revolution, the liberation, and the constitution had died. Why should he not mourn for Sa'd Zaghlul, when the best qualities of his personality came from Sa'd's guidance and leadership?
Yasin stopped once more to open the door. Then he held out his hand to Kamal. After shaking hands with him, Kamal remembered something that had slipped his mind for too long. Embarrassed that he had forgotten, he told Yasin, "I pray to God that you'll find your wife has given birth safely."
Starting to leave, Yasin replied, "God willing. And I hope you sleep soundly."
The End
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