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Putting the Pieces Together 26 страница



 

The goddess Durga was created in a time of great need to overcome a foe that no man could destroy. A womanwas fated to fight the demon Mahishasur, but history got it wrong. Not one woman but two. Two avatars of the goddess overcame Lokesh.

 

Phet said that our future would soon be determined. I wondered if that meant we had to stay here.Could I be happy living in the past? As a goddess I’d be waited upon. Thousands would come to worship us. We’d have all the gifts and weapons at our disposal, and we’d have the Damon Amulet. The power we had was virtually limitless. We could help so many.

 

I sighed. I didn’t crave ultimate power. I didn’t want to lead an empire or make myself out to be the some kind of heroine for the masses. Living as a goddess was a noble sacrifice to make. I’d spend the rest of my days serving others, which was a great thing. But, deep down, a normal life was really what I craved. I wanted a chance to be a mom. To marry a wonderful guy—someone who would take me out to dinner once in a while and who I could nag about putting his socks into the hamper.

 

That was the life I’d planned on.

 

I didn’t want to be magical.

 

I didn’t want to be a goddess.

 

I just wanted to be... me.

 

Anamika and I spent the rest of the afternoon organizing the camp. It was good to be doing something useful, and it kept my mind off whatever the future would bring.

 

After a time of working together quietly, I said to Anamika, “I’m sorry.”

 

“For what?”

 

“For blaming you for Ren’s death.”

 

She paused while folding a blanket, then set it softly on top of a pile. “You were right to blame me. If Lokesh had not killed Ren, I would have tried.”

 

“You were under Lokesh’s control. It’s not your fault.”

 

“I should have been strong enough to resist him.”

 

“No one could.”

 

“You did.”

 

I sighed. “He didn’t have my blood.”

 

“He... he wanted you. I could feel it when he controlled me.”

 

“Yes, he wanted a powerful son, and he thought I could provide one.”

 

Anamika nodded. “You are very beautiful. I understand why he would desire one such as you as his mate.”

 

“Me?” I almost choked with laughter. “Are you serious?”

 

“I do not jest, Kelsey. They all want you. Your tigers are devoted to you utterly. Their eyes never leave your face. You are as the sun to them. You are strong and powerful, and yet your skin is as soft as a flower and your hair smells of perfume. You are small, which makes a man puff out his chest and sweep you into his arms to carry you to safety.

 

“I am not like you. I am big and clumsy. My hair is always in knots and my skin is not creamy like goat’s milk. I fight men and often overpower them, which makes them feel weak. They have no desire to be close to me, and any man who tries is soon scared away when I argue with him. My temper is too fiery.”

 

“I have a temper, too. You should hear some of the fights I’ve had with Ren.”

 

“But still, there is great love there.”

 

“Yes,” I admitted.

 

“When I was with Kishan in battle, our minds connected, and I knew his thoughts about you. He worried that you are still in love with his brother. You once loved Dhiren.”

 

“Yes.”

 

“But now you are betrothed to Kishan.”

 

“Yes.”

 

She considered me quietly for a moment then stood. Before she exited the tent, she said, “I am envious of the love both brothers have for you. Treat them well, litt... Kelsey.”

 

Anamika left, and I stayed in the tent thinking about what she said for a long time.

 

The sunset that night was beautiful. The sky was full of puffy clouds that reflected gold, pink, and orange bands across the sky. The purple and blue mountains cast their shadows over the valley, but the white snow laden tips sparkled in the diminishing sunlight. The smell of pine and oak and campfires filled the air.

 

I sat between Ren and Kishan as we mingled with Anamika and Sunil’s men, sharing an evening meal. I felt content and at peace until the air twinkled and Phet appeared.



 

Saying nothing, he headed through the forest to a secluded glen. The five of us followed, and when Phet turned to speak, my stomach fluttered nervously.

 

“Do you have the Rope of Fire?” Phet asked.

 

Anamika nodded, took it from her bag, and handed it to him.

 

He coiled the Rope in his hand and said, “I am proud of all of you. You have accomplished a great thing and have protected the world from the demon. The stage has been set, and the time has now come for you to take your places and act your parts.”

 

The last rays of the sun hit Phet’s back and shone on his bald head. It might have been an illusion, but his body looked like it was surrounded by light. A bird made a pecking noise on a tree.

 

This was it. The moment when Phet broke the tiger’s curse and Ren and Kishan could be fully human. We’d worked so hard for this. Overcome so much. Would the universe give them what they deserved—a normal life—or would the two of them suddenly age and die before my eyes?

 

I didn’t know what would happen, but I held their hands tightly and wished on the still invisible stars that Ren and Kishan would survive this. Breathing in the scent of the forest, I swallowed nervously and closed my eyes. When I opened them, Phet was smiling at me which I took to be a good sign.

 

“Kelsey,” he said, “It is time for you to go home.”

 

I clutched my tigers’ hands. Uncertainly, I asked, “But what will happen to Anamika?”

 

“She will take on the role destiny created for her.”

 

I looked over at the woman who would become a goddess. She shifted uncomfortably at the news.

 

“You must leave all Durga’s weapons and gifts with her, for she will need them,” Phet instructed.

 

Ren, Kishan, and I handed over everything to the leggy Amazon.

 

She stood stiffly. Her brother said something softly to her, but she refused to make eye contact with the three of us. Her expression was stony, and she seemed determined not to say good-bye.

 

Something in me softened, and I put my arms around her waist. I hugged her fiercely and said, “You’re the bravest woman I know. You’ll be a wonderful Durga.”

 

She hesitated only a moment before hugging me back. Her rigid expression relaxed into one of sadness.

 

“Thank you for returning my brother to me. It is more than I deserve.”

 

I slipped Fanindra from my arm and pressed the snake’s nose to mine. “I never thought I’d get used to having a cobra for a pet. Thank you for saving all of our lives.”

 

The cobra’s golden body grew and she coiled herself around my hands. Her pink tongue shot out and tickled the tip of my nose, and her emerald eyes gleamed. I passed her to Durga who carefully readjusted Fanindra’s coils over her arm.

 

“Take care of her,” I whispered.

 

“We will keep one another company,” the goddess replied. “Goodbye, Kelsey.”

 

Sunil smiled and squeezed my arm.

 

As we parted, I saw Ren nod to her. She gave him a small smile in return, but when Kishan stepped toward her with his hand outstretched, she turned away and wrapped her arm around her brother’s waist. He stubbornly waited for her to look at him, but she refused.

 

I took Ren’s hand in my left and Kishan’s in my right. I had only the clothes on my back. Durga would keep the Damon Amulet, the golden weapons, and all the gifts, and I would return to my time with only myself and my tigers and a crazy story. I was ready.

 

“There’s still one last thing that must be done before I send you back, Kahl-see,” Phet said.

 

He began speaking words in Hindi and then asked, “Do you remember the first piece of the prophecy that was translated?”

 

“‘Seek Durga’s prize. Four gifts, five sacrifices. One transformation. Beast becomes mortal.’”

 

“That is correct. You have found the four gifts of Durga.”

 

“We’ve also given sacrifices at her temples,” Kishan said.

 

“You have, but in this instance the five sacrifices spoken of are not worldly in nature. You have offered four of the five sacrifices. The first sacrifice was when Ren gave up his memory of Kahl-see to save her life.”

 

Ren squeezed my hand as my breath caught.

 

“The second was when Mr. Kadam gave up his life to send Lokesh into the past.”

 

I clutched Kishan’s forearm. Tears welled in my eyes.

 

“The third sacrifice was when Kahl-see gave herself up to the Phoenix as a Sati wife. Her body burned so the tigers would be safe. The fourth sacrifice happened yesterday when Kishan gave up a piece of his own immortality to bring life back to his brother.”

 

My mouth suddenly went dry. “Then the fifth sacrifice...?”

 

“Must be made before you can return.”

 

I couldn’t control the trembling of my limbs. I suddenly felt like my entire body was made of water, and it was all I could do to remain upright.

 

“What else do we need to do?” I whispered.

 

Phet looked at me with deep regret. “Durga needs a tiger.”

 

I sunk to my knees at Phet’s feet. Tears spilled onto my cheeks. “No. No. No.” I mumbled over and over again. This was it. I was so close to getting safely home and now one of the men I loved would remain behind.

 

Durga took a few steps toward me, but I held up my hand and stood of my own accord. She seemed sympathetic but also a bit hopeful.

 

“Stay away from me,” I said. “I... I just can’t look at you right now.”

 

As she dropped her hands to her sides, my gaze flitted over to Ren and Kishan, who were talking quietly with Phet. Ren looked up and what I saw in his eyes frightened me. His gaze was full of regret and sorrow.

 

My hand shook as I cupped my mouth and breathed quickly.

 

“I am truly sorry for this, Kahl-see,” Phet said when he approached me.

 

“Sorry doesn’t fix it.”

 

“No, it does not.”

 

I paced back and forth, glancing from time to time at Ren and Kishan who were in deep discussion. This was what I’d always been afraid of. Ren was going to sacrifice himself. He couldn’t help it. I knew him very well. If he could spend his whole life serving the world, he would do it. He’d give up what he wanted so his brother could be happy. He was going to stay behind with Durga. He’d be a king, a god, and I’d never,ever see him again.

 

I couldn’t look at them anymore. I spun and headed into the trees and collapsed onto a fallen log, sobbing. My heart was breaking. Ren had been brought back from death only in time for me to lose him again.

 

After a while, Kishan crouched in front of me and pushed limp hair away from my stinging eyes.

 

“Shh,bilauta. Everything’s going to be okay.”

 

“How can you...” I snuffled loudly. “How can you say that? We’re going to...” I hiccupped. “Going to lose himforever.”

 

“Come on,” he said as he pulled me to my feet. “Dry your eyes and try to smile. It’s time to say good-bye.”

 

“I can’t, Kishan. I just can’t.”

 

“Please try.” He kissed my forehead and used his thumbs to wipe the tears from my cheeks.

 

I nodded, but looking up at him and seeing his tender expression full of love and patience made my eyes fill again.

 

Softly, he said, “I wanted you from the first moment I saw you hiding in the bushes, Kells. The truth is I knew you were there the whole time. I laid my eyes on you that day, and I haven’t ever been able to look away since. I tried to, but...” he smiled as he pressed his forehead against mine, “... there was something irresistible about you. You were so lost and yet such a spitfire—just like an angry little kitten. I wanted to tuck you into the crook of my arm and keep you.”

 

“Kishan, I—”

 

“I know you love him, Kelsey. I’ve known since that day in the jungle when you confessed your true feelings to Saachi, not knowing it was me in disguise. If I was completely honest with myself I’d confess that I even knew before that.”

 

He took a deep breath and his voice trembled. “I told myself that as long as you wore my ring, as long as you wanted me, needed me, that I would be there for you. That I’d try to become the kind of man you could love. Thereis love between us isn’t there, Kells?” he asked almost desperately.

 

“There is,” I answered as I smoothed his hair from his face. “I could no more give you up than I can him.”

 

He laughed shakily and nodded. “That’s really what I needed to hear.” With a small smile, he kissed each of my hands in turn and said, “Then kiss me good-bye,bilauta.”

 

“What? Good-bye? What do you—”

 

Kishan interrupted me with a kiss. Wrapping his arms around my body, he kissed me softly, sadly. My mind swam with questions, with worries, and with confusion; but all that suddenly became unimportant as I focused on the man who loved me so much he was willing to let me go.

 

I placed my arms around his neck and pulled him closer. Tears dripped down our cheeks. I could taste the saltiness of it. I poured all of my love and affection for this good man into the kiss. It blazed with heat and passion for a short time and then changed into something soft, something tender. When his lips left mine, they trailed over my cheeks and temple as Kishan held me close.

 

I pressed my hand over the heart of my black tiger and knew I’d never be the same without him.

 

“Why are you doing this?” I asked faintly as I sniffled.

 

“It’s the right thing, Kelsey.”

 

“I can’t give you up, Kishan. How can we be asked to make this choice?”

 

He stroked my hair softly and said, “Once, a long time ago, you asked me to let you go. Do you remember?”

 

I nodded against his chest.

 

After a moment, he took my hands and turned them over. He pressed a gentle kiss on each of my palms and said, “Now I’m asking you, Kelsey, to letme go.”

 

I trembled. “Is this what you truly want?”

 

He hesitated only briefly before answering. “It’s what needs to happen.”

 

I cried with renewed vigor while Kishan rubbed my shoulders and

 

back and pressed kisses along my hairline. Finally, he sighed and asked, “Are you ready?”

 

“No,” I dashed my hands across my cheeks. “I promised you a happy ending.”

 

He smiled. “My ending hasn’t been determined yet.” He took my face in his hands and vowed, “I will always hold a piece of you in my heart, Kelsey Hayes.”

 

“And I will keep a place for you in mine, Kishan Rajaram.”

 

Taking my hand, he pressed a golden key into my palm and closed his fingers over mine decisively.

 

“But it belongs to you,” I protested.

 

“Take it with you and build a home like the one we talked about.”

 

“I will,” I whispered.

 

He kissed my closed eyelids. “It’s time, Kells.”

 

Tucking my hand around his arm, we walked back toward the others. Just before we stepped through the trees, he paused. “You’ll remember me?”

 

“How can you even ask?”

 

He grunted. “Promise me something.”

 

I looked into haunted golden eyes full of heartbreak and sorrow and said, “Anything.”

 

“Promise you’ll be happy.”

 

I nodded as he wiped some tears from my cheeks with his thumbs and then guided me out of the trees.

 

“We’re ready,” Kishan announced. He led me over to Ren and put my hand into his brother’s. Ren’s bright blue eyes were red rimmed and full of unshed tears, but they met mine unashamedly, and he squeezed my hand gently.

 

“Take care of her,” Kishan said to his brother.

 

Ren clasped Kishan’s arm in his and said with a quiver in his voice, “Yours in life, Kishan.”

 

“Yours in death, Dhiren,” Kishan finished.

 

“Thank you,” Ren said softly.

 

“Strive your whole life to deserve her, brother.”

 

When Ren nodded, Kishan stretched out his fingers to trail them briefly down my jaw before turning away. He stopped next to Durga and folded his arms across his chest. Neither of them looked at each other.

 

Phet stepped forward. “A sacrifice has been made. Kishan will henceforth be known as Damon, the tiger of Durga. He will keep his power to heal as well as his ability to shift into tiger form, though there is now no limit on how long he can remain human. As for Ren...”

 

Phet lifted the Damon Amulet and murmured a few words. A bright light circled around the amulet. It seemed to draw a white mist from Ren’s body and pull it through the disk.

 

“The transformation is done. The beast is mortal.” Phet stepped forward and clasped Ren’s shoulder. His eyes were also full of tears. “Congratulations, son.”

 

Ren put his hand on his chest and gasped. “It... he’s... gone. The tiger is gone.”

 

“You are a mortal once again,” Phet said. “You will live a normal life span as if you were starting over again at twenty-one years of age.”

 

Phet approached me and took my right hand. He pressed his over mine until the henna tattoo he’d given me glowed red and then faded. He patted my newly naked right hand. Turning away, he flicked the Rope. Fire shot down the length of it. He whipped it into a circle to open a vortex.

 

Phet announced, “Three of you came to the past, and three must return. Sunil?”

 

“No!” Durga gasped in shock. “You willnot take my brother.”

 

“One that they love for one that you love, Anamika. This is how the universe maintains balance.”

 

“It is not fair! My burden is too heavy to bear!”

 

“Damon will help you,” Phet counseled.

 

She narrowed her eyes at Kishan, who accepted her scrutiny with patience.

 

Turning to her brother, she took his hands. “I never asked for this,” she said with a voice cracking with tears.

 

“Shh, Mika,” Sunil said. “It will be alright. Phet told me about this last night, and I agreed.” He gripped her arm and explained. “There is no longer a place for me here, dear sister. The armies look to you now. You are their leader. If I stayed by your side, I would only remind them that you were once human. Men will test you, question you, and use me as an excuse to try to strip the power from you. It must be made known that Anamika and Sunil Kalinga died in this battle. Durga survived, and it is Durga you must now become. Hold this power close. Guard it. The world is in your hands, my sister. It is not easy leaving you, but for you to take your true place in history, I must.”

 

“How will I do this knowing my brother exists in another time, another place?”

 

“The same way I will. I will send my wishes to you in the stars. I’m so proud of you, Mika.” He kissed his twin sister on both cheeks.

 

“I will miss you, Sunil.”

 

“And I will think of you every day.”

 

He clutched Kishan’s arm. “Will you care for my sister?”

 

“I will protect her with my life,” Kishan pledged.

 

The two men studied each other for a moment before Sunil nodded. We all took a final sip from thekamandal so the pressure of the universe would be less heavy to bear.

 

I turned to look into Kishan’s golden eyes one last time. He smiled softly, and I whispered, “I love you.”

 

Then Ren took my hand, and together we ran for the vortex, Sunil at our side.

 

As I jumped through, I heard Kishan say softly, “Good-bye,bilauta.”

 

Thoughts dragged sharp claws across my heart, threatening to tear it open. I closed my eyes and whispered to the universe to please take care of Kishan and give him the life he deserved.

 

Pressing Kishan’s ring to my lips, I gave myself up to the darkness.

 

 

promises

 

Kelsey. Miss Kelsey. Wake up!”

 

Someone shook my shoulder, and I groaned.

 

“Come on, Miss Kelsey Please.”

 

“Listen, bossy warrior Barbie, let me sleep,” I grumbled and rolled over onto cold, smooth tile.

 

Placing my palm down on the hard surface and propping myself up, I cracked open a crusted eye. “Where am I?”

 

“You are home,” a friendly voice answered.

 

“Home?”

 

I sat up and rubbed my eyes.Nilima!

 

I was sitting in a ray of sunshine in the foyer of Ren’s house.

 

She hugged me lightly, and we both turned when we heard a grunt.

 

“Ren?”

 

I crawled over to Ren as he blinked and sat up.

 

“Are you okay?” he asked as he cupped my cheek.

 

I pressed my hand on top of his. His eyes searched mine, and I knew he was asking about more than my physical health.

 

“I will be,” I answered softly.

 

We heard another moan and found Sunil sprawled on the thick carpet of the music room. Nilima stepped around us, and her eyes widened at the stranger.

 

Trying to get his bearings, Sunil stood and gaped openly at the grand piano, Ren’s guitars, and the giant stereo system gleaming before him.

 

“Welcome to our home,” Ren said. “We’ll put you in Kishan’s room for the time being.”

 

Sunil nodded distractedly as he stretched out his fingers to touch framed pictures and an antique lamp, but when Ren pulled Nilima into the room to make introductions, the stranger from centuries earlier ignored everything but the woman in front of him.

 

Sunil smiled disarmingly, and I was struck again by how handsome he was. His green eyes flashed as he took Nilima’s palm. Bowing, he pressed his forehead against her hand and said, “It is an honor to greet one so beautiful. Thank you for your hospitality.”

 

Nilima narrowed her eyes suspiciously and snatched her hand back. “You’re welcome.” Turning to Ren, she queried, “Who is he? And where is Kishan?”

 

“Kishan... won’t be returning,” Ren said softly.

 

Nilima turned questioning eyes to me. I swallowed and nodded as I felt the pain of leaving Kishan creep back up my throat.

 

“Tell me we haven’t lost him too,” she entreated.

 

“He has not passed on, dear lady,” Sunil explained. “He has stayed in the past to take care of my sister.”

 

“Who is your sister and why is she worthy enough to demand his attention?” Nilima asked hotly, tears in her eyes.

 

“My sister is the goddess Durga. Your brother Kishan has become the tiger Damon. He is to serve alongside her.”

 

“I see,” Nilima nodded and took a step backward, stumbling a bit.

 

Regret stole over Sunil’s face. “Forgive me. I am sorry to bear news that causes you pain.”

 

Ren put his arm around Nilima. “We have much to tell you.”

 

She wiped her eyes and straightened her shoulders. “Perhaps you’d better tell me everything that has happened over the last six months. It’s June already.”

 

Ren and I couldn’t believe so much time had passed. The four of us went to the Peacock room and spent all afternoon speaking of our travels. Sunil asked many questions about how we obtained the gifts for Durga and was fascinated by the Fire Realm. I sat next to Ren and didn’t say much. I just listened to his warm voice as he patiently answered question after question.

 

Later that night I called my foster family. Nilima had been sending them cards from me, but it was good to hear their voices. Mike and Sarah had a thousand questions and stories to tell. They weren’t my parents, but they too were part of what I’d come to call home and talking with them helped ease the ache of missing Kishan a little.

 

At sunset, Nilima brought in food, but I found I didn’t have much of an appetite. Ren kept me close by wrapping his arm around me. I fell asleep cuddled on Ren’s chest to the sound of the three of them quietly talking.

 

Waking abruptly in pitch darkness, I discovered I was lying in my bedroom upstairs. Automatically my hand shot out over the side of the mattress, searching for my tiger. He wasn’t there. Sleepily, I stumbled to the sliding balcony door and opened it.

 

“Kishan?” I called softly. But there was no black tail hanging lazily over the swinging bench.

 

Reality crashed into my brain: I’d never see my black tiger again. Tears slipped down, tickling my cheeks like soft fairy wings. I closed the door and pressed my forehead against the glass. “Ren?” I whispered, but there was no response.

 

Staggering back to bed, I grabbed my grandmother’s quilt and slid under the sheets. My hand hit fur, startling me, but I quickly realized that it was only the stuffed tiger I’d purchased in Oregon so long ago. I pulled him near, lay my head on his paws, and slept.

 

After a hot shower and putting on fresh clothes the next morning, I felt more human. I found Sunil at the kitchen counter, getting a lesson in how to use the microwave. A variety of breakfast items were spread across the counter.

 

I selected a plate of sliced fresh peaches over reheated waffles while I watched Sunil and Nilima, who was uncharacteristically flustered. She blushed often while he seemed not to mind a whit that he was in completely unfamiliar territory.

 

After the microwaving lesson, Sunil quickly picked up a glass and asked for another demonstration on how to get “icy cubes.”

 

I smiled, thinking that Nilima had better watch out; Sunil was a wily one. As she showed him how to work the refrigerator, I could see he was paying more attention to her than her teaching. Stirring my mug of chocolate, I wondered how Anamika would feel about her brother courting Nilima.

 

After a hearty breakfast, I wandered the house and found Ren in Mr. Kadam’s room, reading some notes.

 

Closing the book with a pop, he rose and took my hand. “Did you sleep well?” he asked.

 

I shrugged, not really knowing what to say. He frowned slightly and lowered his eyes.

 

“Do you,” he swallowed, “do you want to go home? To Oregon?”

 

“I... I don’t know. I’m not sure,” I admitted truthfully. Ren, Kishan, and I had had such a focused goal for so long. Now that our task was completed, I felt a bit directionless.

 

Nodding, he kissed my cheek. “Please let me know what you decide,” he said and then turned and left the room.

 

What was that about?I wondered.

 

On June twenty-fourth, one week after traveling through the vortex, I dressed with extra care and straightened my hair before heading downstairs. Nilima had left a note saying she was taking Sunil clothes shopping in town and that they were staying late to have dinner. I ate breakfast alone and then searched for Ren, but he wasn’t around either.

 

With not much else to do, I read most of the afternoon, took a call from Mike and Sarah, and then watched a series of movies in the theater room. I made kettle corn and fondly remembered how Ren, Kishan, and I liked to watch movies eating great big bowls of the stuff.


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