жесткое воспитание детей

wave [weɪv] волна tough [tʌf] parenting жесткое воспитание детей huge influence ['ɪnfluəns] огромное влияние commandments [kə'mɑːndmənt] заповеди chore [ʧɔː] ежедневная,рутинная работа по дому	dose [dəus] доза vitamin [ˈvɪtəmɪn] dependence зависимость sign [saɪn] знак; символ affection привязанность in order to для того, чтобы	instead (of) [ɪn'sted] вместо; взамен decent ['di:sənt] приличный, порядочный law-abiding ['lɔː ə'baɪdɪŋ] законопослушный reclaim возвращать себе (у т раченное) authority [ɔːˈθɒrəti] власть swallow ['swɔləu] проглатывать, принимать на веру
joy радость, счастье slap шлепать pattern ['pætən] образец, модель lose temper выходить из себя abuse [ə'bju:s] плохое, жестокое обращение out of fear из-за страха redirect [ri:dɪ'rekt] переориентировать(ся) consequence [ˈkɒnsɪkwəns] (по)следствие, резуль т а т	responsibility ответственность guidelines ['gaɪdlaɪn] рекомендации comfort ['kʌmfət] утешать, успокаивать provide [prə'vaɪd] order обеспечивать порядок consistent последовательный, постоянный praise хвалить essential [ɪˈsenʃəl] важнейший,нео т ъемлемый
demand [dɪ'mɑːnd] требование, требовать devote [dɪ'vəut] to smth/smb посвящать к-т/ч-т top priority [praɪ'ɔrətɪ] высший приоритет absorb [əb'zɔːb] впитывать; абсорбировать sponge [spʌndʒ] губка on occasion при случае, иногда reasonable разумный	involve вовлекать trend направление, тенденция considerate внимательный к другим generosity [ʤenə'rɔsɪtɪ] щедрость generous ['ʤenərəs] щедрый sense of justice ['ʤʌstɪs] чувство справедливости deepen ['di:pən] углублять

1. Seven Ways to Be a Good Parent, from The Observer

A whole new wave of tough parenting is setting revolutionary changes in childcare on both sides of the Atlantic. Writing in more than 150 newspapers and selling more than three million copies of his books, John Rosemond and his ideas could have a huge influence on the next generation of American children. Why and how? Here are his seven commandments: 1. You should pay more attention to your marriage rather than to your children 2. Expect your children to obey, and punish them every time they don't.

3. In order to build up their characters, you must make them do lots of chores. 4. Give them regular and realistic doses of 'Vitamin N'. (Say No.) 5. You mustn't let them have too many toys. 6. Limit their dependence on television. 7. Stop trying to make them happy all the time, and stop trying to be popular with them. You don't have to buy endless presents as a sign of your affection. Instead, you should show your love for them by doing what you have to do to turn them into decent, law-abiding citizens.

These views come from Rosemond's central belief: American parents have become too weak, and they need to reclaim their authority. He sees a country full of parents being ruled by their children, who are allowed to do what they want when they want to, and who don't know the meaning of the word 'no'. And Rosemond doesn't like what he sees. He believes in parent power. Once he was a long-haired, drug-taking boy. But then he got married, had a child and grew up. He says that because of theories in child development, parents

are now confused and unsure of what they are supposed to do. He says parents shouldn't worry. They ought to go back to basics - quick, easy and theory-free. The truth is that Rosemond is an anti-expert childcare expert. He thinks parents have to take back the control they once had over their kids; to be free of the experts and the theory-makers. And if people swallow his ideas, who knows? Perhaps the next generation will grow up more disciplined than the last, and maybe their parents will get the respect they deserve.

2. Parenting Tips

I love my children, but being a parent can be so hard!

Being a parent can be a joy, but it's also a tough job. No parent is perfect. We all make mistakes. Even loving parents sometimes do things they don't mean to do, like slap a child or call a child a bad name. But if you think you're having trouble controlling yourself, get help so a pattern of abuse doesn't start.

I get so frustrated sometimes. Is this normal?

Yes. All parents get frustrated. Children take a lot of time and energy. Parenting is even harder when you have problems in your life, such as worries about your job, your bills or your relationships, or problems with alcohol or drugs. To be a good parent, you have to take care of yourself. That means getting help for your problems.

What can I do when I feel frustrated?

Take a break. Everyone needs a break from being a parent once in a while. If you have another adult in your family, take turns getting away. For example, have your partner stay with the children so you can visit friends. Take turns sleeping late on the weekends. If you're a single parent, ask friends and relatives to help by doing some tasks for you. Maybe they could watch your child while you go out.

I sometimes lose my temper. Does that mean I'm a bad parent?

No. Many parents lose their temper with their children. It's OK to feel angry, but it's not OK to take it out on your children. When you're really angry, take a break. For example, take your children for a walk or call a friend to come to help you. If you feel angry with your child almost every day or have trouble controlling your temper, get some help. You might talk to your family doctor. There are groups that can help parents, too.

Is it OK to spank my child?

Spanking isn't the best way to discipline children. The goal of discipline is to teach children self-control. Spanking just teaches children to stop doing something out of fear. There are better ways to discipline children.

One good way for them is called " redirecting. " When you redirect a child, you replace an unwanted (bad) behavior with an acceptable (good) behavior. For example, if throwing a ball inside the house isn't allowed, take your child outside to throw the ball.

With older children, try to get them to see the consequences of their actions and to take responsibility for them. For example, you can explain to your son that everyone had to wait for dinner because he didn't set the table when he was supposed to. Explain that he has to wash the dishes after dinner because he didn't set the table before dinner.

How can I be a good parent?

There's not just one right way to raise children. And there's no such thing as a perfect parent--or a perfect child. But here are some guidelines to help your children grow up healthy and happy:

· Show your love. Every day, tell your children: "I love you. You're special to me." Give lots of hugs and kisses.

· Listen when your children talk. Listening to your children tells them that you think they're important and that you're interested in what they have to say.

· Make your children feel safe. Comfort them when they're scared. Show them you've taken steps to protect them.

· Provide order in their lives. Keep a regular schedule of meals, naps and bedtimes. If you have to change the schedule, tell them about the changes ahead of time.

· Praise your children. When your children learn something new or behave well, tell them you're proud of them.

· Criticize the behavior, not the child. When your child makes a mistake, don't say, "You were bad." Instead, explain what the child did wrong. For example, say: "Running into the street without looking isn't safe." Then tell the child what to do instead: "First, look both ways for cars."

· Be consistent. Your rules don't have to be the same ones other parents have, but they do need to be clear and consistent. (Consistent means the rules are the same all the time.) If two parents are raising a child, both need to use the same rules. Also, make sure baby sitters and relatives know, and follow, your family rules.

· Spend time with your children. Do things together, like reading, walking, playing and cleaning house. What children want most is your attention. Bad behavior is usually their way of getting your attention.

Who can I ask when I need help raising my child?

There are many ways to get good parenting advice. You can also ask your family doctor for parenting help. Don't be embarrassed to ask. Raising children is hard, and no one can do it alone. Your doctor can help you with such things like discipline, potty training, eating problems and bedtime. Your doctor can also help you find local groups that can help you learn better parenting skills.

3. Ten Tips for Raising Children of Character by Kevin Ryan, San Francisco

It is one of those essential facts of life that raising good children - children of character-- demand s time and attention. While having children may be "doing what comes naturally," being a good parent is much more complicated. Here are ten tips to help your children build strong characters:

1. Put parenting first. This is hard to do in a world with so many competing demands. Good parents always plan and devote time to parenting. They make developing their children’s character their top priority.

2. Review how you spend the hours and days of your week. Think about the amount of time your children spend with you.

3. Be a good example. Face it: human beings learn primarily through modeling. In fact, you can’t avoid being an example to your children, whether good or bad. Being a good example, then, is probably your most important job.

4. Develop an ear and an eye for what your children are absorbing. Children are like sponges. Much of what they take in has to do with moral values and character. Books, songs, TV, the Internet, and films are continually delivering messages–moral and immoral–to our children. As parents we must control the flow of ideas and images that are influencing our children.

5. Use the language of character. Children cannot develop a moral compass unless people around them use the clear, sharp language of right and wrong.

6. Punish with a loving heart. Today, punishment has a bad reputation. The results are guilty parents and out-of-control children. Children need limits. They will ignore these limits on occasion. Reasonable punishment is one of the ways human beings have always learned. Children must understand what punishment is for and know that its source is parental love.

7. Learn to listen to your children. It is easy for us to turn off the talk of our children. One of the greatest things we can do for them is to take them seriously and set aside time to listen.

8. Get deeply involve d in your child’s school life. School is the main event in the lives of our children. Their experience there is a mixed bag of triumphs and disappointments. How they deal with them will influence the course of their lives. Helping our children become good students is another name for helping them to get a strong character.

9. Make a big deal out of the family meal. One of the most dangerous trend s in America is the dying of the family meal. The dinner table is not only a place of family business but also a place for the teaching and passing on of our values. Manners and rules are absorbed over the table.

10. Do not reduce character education to words only. We gain much through practice. Parents should help children by promoting moral action through self-discipline, good work habits, kind and considerate behavior to others, and community service.

As parents, we want our children to be the architects of their own character, while we accept the responsibility to be architects of the environment-physical and moral. We need to create an environment in which our children can develop habits of honesty, generosity, and a sense of justice. For most of us, the greatest opportunity we personally have to deepen our own character is through the daily blood, sweat and tears of struggling to be good parents.

Homework for the___________________: read the 2^nd article, translate it. Work with a marker underlining (highlighting) everything you agree or disagree with.

+ Fill-in-the-blanks + All words

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