My Family.

I believe we are an average Russian family. There are four of us: my mother, my father, my brother and me. We also have a grandfather who doesn’t live with us. He was an engineer. Now he is retired. Grandpa knows all about radio sets and likes to repair old ones. He can fix almost everything: a vacuum cleaner, a washing machine, and what not. His wife, my Granny, died when I was very little.

My Dad is forty-five years old He works in the office of an engineering company. He is very handsome. My Mum keeps house and takes care of us. She’s good at cooking and sews perfectly. We are very united and never quarrel.

At the weekends we usually go to the country and have family parties there. Sometimes my aunts and uncles join us for holidays, weddings, birthdays and other celebrations.

Once upon a time in the deepest part of the ocean there lived a mermaid. She was pretty and charming. And her name was Belle. She had a lot of relatives, some of them were married, others – divorced, but all of them were devoted to each other. They were so devoted to each other that they hated human beings who lived in the world above the water.

Belle was a quiet child, she didn’t do all the things her sisters considered to be best in the universe. She didn’t have collections of boy-friends, and naturally, she didn’t keep their pictures in a photograph album. She knew what fashion was? But she wasn’t in the know what the height of it was. She wasn’t nasty when her father forbade her to do something and she never referred to him for help. Belle was tolerant, respectful and understanding. Maybe, that’s why she was the only one in the family who wasn’t against visiting people’s castles, their towns and villages.

Once Belle couldn’t help doing it. She rose to the surface of the sea. The moment she rose there, she saw a young man bathing nearby. The mermaid was extremely beautiful and attracted his attention. He spoke to her, but she didn’t understand his language. Anyway, the young man gave her a flower. When she was back she always kept it in a drawer hidden from the eyes of her family members. But one day her brother who was a year her senior, peeped into that drawer and discovered the flower. Her grandpa, the head of the family, became furious. He tore the flower into pieces and locked the mermaid in a tower. There she stayed for days and days and grew pale and thin and quiet. She missed the world she had seen once so much that she died of a heart attack one day.

Dwelling. Dictation.

If you are invited to an English home, at five o’clock in the morning you get a cup of tea. You must not say “Go away.” On the contrary, you have to say, with your best five o’clock smile, “Thank you so much. I love a cup of early morning tea, especially early in the morning.”

Then you have tea for breakfast; then you have tea at eleven o’clock in the morning; then after lunch; then you have tea for tea; then after supper; and again at eleven o’clock at night.

You must not refuse tea under the following circumstances: if it is hot; if it is cold; if you are tired; if anybody thinks that you might be tired; if you are nervous; if you are happy; before you go out; if you are out; if you have just returned home; if you have had no tea for some time; if you have just had a cup.

You definitely must not follow my example. I sleep at five o’clock in the morning; I have coffee for breakfast; I drink innumerable cups of black coffee during the day.

The other day, for instance, I wanted a cup of coffee and a piece of cheese for tea. It was a very hot day, and my wife made some cold coffee and put it in the refrigerator, where it froze solid. On the other hand, she left the cheese on the kitchen table, where it melted. So I had a piece of coffee and a glass of cheese.

(from How to Be an Alien by George Mikes, adapted)

Дата добавления: 2015-07-19