Whitewater Rendezvous

scooted over next to her until their bodies were just touching. “I’m not buying your bullshit excuses. I could feel in your kiss how much you want this. Need this. Just as much as I do.”

Chaz didn’t move. You can’t tell her she’s wrong. Her body was still so overheated from arousal that the cool air on her exposed legs was welcome. “Megan, please…” Her voice was honey thick. She meant it to sound like a protest, but it came out like a plea.

Megan looked her in the eyes and smiled knowingly, as though recognizing the desire she could not hide. Why was it again we shouldn’tdo this? Chaz wondered.

Before her mind could regain enough sense to answer, Megan’s face was descending toward hers. It paused just before their lips met.

“Let me touch you, Chaz. I want to make you come,” she whispered, then kissed her hard.

As her tongue pushed into Chaz’s mouth, Megan’s hand cupped her sex, and Chaz’s body involuntarily rose to meet the contact. Oh,Jesus, God. She could feel how wet she was, and she knew Megan could feel it too; it quickly saturated the thin material of her boxers.

Megan’s own excitement doubled when her fi ngers told her how aroused Chaz was, and she pressed her body tighter against Chaz’s with a moan.

You can’t do this. Chaz had no idea how her conscience had resurfaced at this moment. Or was it pride? Her professional ethics were losing their grip. And she hardly cared whether it was just for one night, any more. She wanted Megan so much. But what if this is all partof a bet? She didn’t want to believe that was true. God damn it.

She pulled Megan’s hand away as she forced their lips apart.

“Please stop.” Her voice broke with emotion.

Megan was breathing hard. She backed away slowly, just enough to separate their bodies. She could tell Chaz was upset, and that was what fi nally penetrated her determined efforts and haze of arousal.

“I want to,” Chaz admitted, staring up at the ceiling. She couldn’t look at Megan. She’d give in for sure, if she looked into those eyes.

“God, I want to. I’m so sorry. But not like this. Please, Megan.”

Megan shifted back onto her own sleeping bag and turned away without a word, fi ghting the urge to say something impulsive she knew she might later regret. Her anger was mitigated slightly by the sincere regret she heard in Chaz’s voice.

• 153 •

KIM BALDWIN

Not like this. The words echoed in Megan’s mind. She wants you.

Just not like this. If she has reservations you really don’t want to pushthis right now, do you? She might regret it if you do. And you don’t wanther to.

Chaz wished to hell she could think of something to say. Or that Megan would say something. Anything. Nothing like silence after arejection to make you feel like a complete ass. She hated hurting Megan, or embarrassing her. She knew she shouldn’t have let them go so far.

After a time, Megan’s anger subsided enough for her to realize that it was up to her to ease the tension between them. It had been she, after all, who had started all this in the fi rst place. But it was a diffi cult apology. She still felt humiliated, and she couldn’t face Chaz when she spoke the words. “I’m sorry. I should have heard no the fi rst time you said it.”

“I’m sorry, too, Megan,” Chaz said. “I don’t want this to...make things uncomfortable or anything. I mean, can’t we just put tonight behind us and enjoy the rest of the trip?”

“Sure. No problem.”

It was an awkward, uneasy truce.

Chaz’s mind and body were so keyed up that it was a very long time before she fell asleep, and she knew from Megan’s frequent, restless shifts in positions that she wasn’t faring any better. But no more words were spoken between them.

O

Megan was relieved to wake up alone the next morning. She hoped that a few minutes alone in the stark light of a new day might help her make some sense of what had happened. And why what had happened had hurt so much.

She wanted to say it didn’t matter. It was only that she wasn’t often turned down. And certainly not right in the middle of things like that. Your ego is bruised, that’s all. You’ll get over it.

But it did matter. Chaz’s rejection stung. And part of the reason it hurt so much was that she had to admit that she herself couldn’t have stopped what was happening. She had totally lost control. She had been more turned on than she could ever remember, more lost in the sensations pouring through her body than she’d imagined she could be.

• 154 •

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